Name: CHEC Rocky Mountain Homeschool Conference
Start: 2025-06-12T00:00:00-05:00
End: 2025-06-14T23:59:59-05:00
Location: Denver, CO

Tagged: Laying Down the Rails, obedience, respect

This topic has 46 replies, 17 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 2 months ago by jill smith.

Viewing 15 posts - 16 through 30 (of 47 total)

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February 18, 2014 at 3:55 am
Mysterious Lady in Pink
Participant
Lindsey, I keep getting redirected back to the SCM discussion home page when I click on or copy the link for Bored Jar. Would you please help me with that? (Or are we sending them to the SCM discussion forum when they are bored? lol I’ll go! Pick me! )
February 18, 2014 at 4:11 am
Shannon
Participant
Lindsey, your Bored Jar link didn’t work. Can you try that again?
I’d love to hear exactly how you went about taking all the toys away. Were they there when you took them? Or was it overnight/when they were out with someone? Did they know it was going to happen and exactly why? What did you do with the items you took? Did you take their bikes also? Was this also a complete ‘no screen’ time for them? What about art supplies? I’m having some difficulties with my almost 8yo son and feel this would be great for him. Even though we have very few toys really, they still provide a lot of difficulty for my family and my son’s work ethic is non-existant. If I could snap my fingers and have it all gone for a month or two, I’d do it. I’m just not sure what to do with it all while it is away! I’d love to hear more about what you did and how you decided it was time to let the items return (and if that was gradual, if they were earned back, etc). Thanks!
(ETA that’s funny, Mysterious Lady in Pink!)
February 18, 2014 at 4:28 am
LindseyD
Participant
Sorry y’all! Try this: http://todayindietzville.blogspot.com/2013/02/mom-im-bored.html?m=1
February 19, 2014 at 5:47 pm
blue j
Participant
jrs5kids, I just read what you said about your dd being so “strong-willed”. I used to say the same thing until I read and reread CM’s writings. In actuality, your dd is WEAK-willed – as I discoved that I and some of my children were. (How embarrassing to write that.) Once I replaced the one word with the other, it was easier for me to see all the areas where this reared its ugly head in our home, and also deal with it appropriately. This may or may not be an issue for you, but when I thought “strong-willed”, although I was not pleased with the behavior, the word strong equates to “good”, so in essence, I wasn’t needing to build that quality, just bend it. However, once I realized what was going on was a matter of weak-will, that took on a whole different shape for me and made things easier for me to persevere somehow. I guess it was the realization that I wasn’t just needing to bend something, but actually build it up that made the difference.
Hoping you hit your stride with this and find ways to build your children up in this area.
February 19, 2014 at 6:12 pm
TailorMade
Participant
@ blue j-the weak willed idea ran through my brain in my sleep last night. Do you recall which volume includes the discussion? I need to reread it for myself right now. We’ve had a rough few months physically, so I’m worn down and need to retrain my own habits into a strong willed mom instead of a weak willed one.
February 20, 2014 at 1:05 am
Doug Smith
Keymaster
You might like to grab our free Way of the Will e-book. It deals with that very topic.
February 20, 2014 at 1:21 am
TailorMade
Participant
YEAH!
February 20, 2014 at 2:28 am
Sue
Participant
That is brilliant–“weak-willed” instead of “strong-willed.” That concept hit me like it came out of nowhere. I don’t know why I never thought of it that way. (Probably because “strong-willed” has become such a popular topic in child discipline.) I’d like to know where to find that in Miss Mason’s writings, too.
Thanks, Doug, for recommending the e-book….hadn’t even known about it before. Now to decide if I should order it in the Kindle for PC format or wait until I get my tablet I’m planning to purchase, which isn’t going to be a Kindle. (What can I say? I’m cheap….uh, make that thrifty!)
February 20, 2014 at 3:27 am
suzukimom
Participant
Sue, most tablets will run a kindle app….
February 20, 2014 at 7:29 pm
mycupoverflows
Participant
I just read about this very topic yesterday! It is in “Home Education” in the last chapter called “The Will-The Conscience-The Divine Life in the Child”. It is an absolutely fascinating read. I feel like I got a revelation from Heaven after reading it! 🙂
February 20, 2014 at 11:29 pm
Sue
Participant
most tablets will run a kindle app….
I haven’t checked into it yet, but if I download a kindle app to a new tablet, can I access the stuff I already have in my kindle for PC library? Does anybody know the answer to that?
February 20, 2014 at 11:47 pm
blue j
Participant
Sue, I was able to do so on my tablet.
February 21, 2014 at 12:15 am
Sue
Participant
Yay! Thanks, blue j & suzukimom.
February 26, 2014 at 3:53 am
jill smith
Participant
Ok, really need some exta support this week. Even after doing the cleaning out of toys and things my son keeps power struggling me. For instance: He was suppose to do a chore and refused to so I sat him in the corner andchevjust kept rebellingvagainst my authority. I wanted to scream. He makes me so mad. They constantly pick at each other. I honestly thinkwe all have winter blues.
Does anyone have a good school scedule, like what you do every day. Do you block time lets say from 8-8:30 you do math ect. I am struggling with do they all do math together, my oldest at home is 15 so should he join in with us or let him go on his own? I keep being asked how much does your 5 soon to be 6 yr girl do all day. Mmmm….play, some readong FIAR and math.
Is that enough i have been asked? I feel like I dought when im confronted with these questions.
February 26, 2014 at 4:59 am
Wings2fly
Participant
I have hesitated to give advice here. I have the same unanswered questions as Shannon above. I am afraid that if I took everything away from my kids, they would only get into mischief. I have been looking towards a gentler approach and I highly recommend books by Sally Clarkson to give you an idea of what that looks like, or her blog at http://www.itakejoy.com. You are their mother and you know them best. You need to get to the heart of the matters with each child. Your focus should be more on habits and character now than academics, while still meeting requirements. Do you have a good family read aloud going now for literature? This could be a special time for you all to bond together. Charlotte Mason says that education is an atmosphere, a discipline, a life. Do you have the right kinds of books and things available? You said you do not do video games, but do they have other screen times (tv, computer, iPod, tablet, etc.)? These may need to be restricted, while leaving educational games and living books and art supplies and beautiful music around aplenty. I am praying for you to figure this out soon.
You need a routine or schedule and general rules laid out for your family. And it won’t look like anyone else’s. In Laying Down the Rails, there is a small section on the habit of regularity. It starts with consistent bed times and then meal times and then work in other regular activities. For more on this, I recommend Managers of Their Homes. This will take a while to figure out and implement. Pray about what is right for your family.
A 15 yo can do much on his own. See http://www.urthemom.com and her book. In CM, the 6 yo does not need much academics. She learns through play and she needs to learn good habits now. How old is the son who power struggles over chores? I am hoping some wiser, more experienced moms will chime in here soon.