Feeling inadequate

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  • mrsmccardell
    Participant

    I am really off and on with getting a good, solid footing with home school.  I’ll go through weeks where I feel like we’re doing awesome and then other weeks where I feel like we’re flopping.  I know that there will be ups and downs but the extremes seem to be more than that.  I don’t know if I suffer from comparison syndrome so it may just be my fault.  I feel like we’re doing enough and I even have a spreadsheet with names of great curric that’s been mentioned on here for later grades and a rough sketch of our next few years.  But the great ideas keep coming and then I keep questioning.  I know some questioning is always healthy but why does it turn out to make me feel bad about what we are doing at our house?  

    We are taking it slow (7, 6, 3, 7 mos) and that’s our choice so why do I feel bad when I read about some 6yo that are doing a lot.  Again, reminding myself that their family is different and their school is different.  I’m trying to understand this constant self-defeating pattern so it doesn’t destroy me/us!  

    Sometimes I wonder if it’s b/c we don’t have all the workbooks to “show” what we are doing.  Or we’re not a family that loves writing so that takes out a lot of our hands-on options.  I’m all over the place with my thoughts so I really need to find the peace.  I’ve been praying and I’ll continue but thought maybe the experienced mamas could lend a hand.  Thanks.  I love this forum and I’ve learned so much.  I refer to you as my friends when I speak to others! Wink

    Blessings,

    Leslie 

    Super23
    Member

    I understand how you feel!! I always wonder the same thing, but I’ve decided not to let fear run my life. The best thing for me has been my homeschoolers devotional bible. It always makes me feel better.

    mrsmccardell
    Participant

    Super23, what is the name of your homeschoolers devotional?

    So based on what I wrote above are you saying it would be described as fear?  

    Tristan
    Participant

    I think becoming comfortable in our homeschool skin was easier to do when the internet wasn’t such a part of the picture.  We really didn’t have options paraded in front of us daily so we kept on with what we set out to do.  I know this was true for me in the beginning.  There just was not a well established homeschool online community that I was aware of 9 years ago.  I didn’t have pinterest, blogs, and forums showing me a hundred different ways to teach the same subject to the same age as my child/children.  I had to rely on prayer to figure out what to do. 

    Today I find I must be much more deliberate.  I have to pray over our decisions and then commit to sticking with them long-term half a school year or the whole school year.  Then I have to stop reading things online when I find myself losing my contentment with our plan.  Unless something is seriously not working for our homeschool I try to avoid changing curriculum plans until the school year is over.  My husband is my accountability partner for this, he reminds me to stay the course until the year is up.  Then I can enjoy exploring all the possibilities for a new year, pray about them, commit to the next year’s plan, and practice contentment again.

     

    ((HUGS))  It’s not easy!

    mrsmccardell
    Participant

    Thanks Tristan.  I’ll add contentment to my list!

    Monica
    Participant

    I can relate to what you are talking about!  It’s very challenging with babies and toddlers in the mix.  This is my first year when my kids are ages 4 and up!

    We don’t do a lot of writing (all of my 12YO’s writing is in his blog and my 7YO is still doing copywork), we don’t do a lot of hands-on experiments, and we don’t have ANY worksheets.

    We are making progress, though.  My 7YO is obsessed with talking about the periodic table – and loves to think about Marie Curie and her radium “night light”; my 5YO and 4YO both sounded out words from the missal at church yesterday for the FIRST time;  My 12YO is away at his nana’s work learning about ecology and endangered species, and he packed a bunch of reading to do in his spare time while he’s there. 

    These real-world learning experiences are so valuable, and the variety of books we read are really the foundation of our homeschooling.  They create such a broad, rich learning experience.

    And, for what it’s worth, my older two do the CAT tests each year (because our state requires it) and they do well.

    This is my third year and I find that we are settling into a nice routine and we’ve found a flow that works for each of the kids.

    Prayers that you will find peace!

    Super23
    Member

    Yes, I’d say it sounds like fear. You’re afraid that what you’re doing is not enough or that you’re doing the wrong thing. I have all the same fears. My bible is called Homeschool Mom’s Bible.

    elsnow6
    Participant

    Guilty here!! I call it Pinterest Syndrome lol 🙂 It’s this idea that IF I can just get this perfect plan (how to arrange my kitchen, how to homeschool without tears, how to cook 6000 meals ahead of time so not stressed at dinner, etc), then life will fall into place and not be overwhelming. Of course, that’s never worked out! Surprising lol :-p

    missceegee
    Participant

    Tristan is so right!! In some ways, everything about life was easier prior to the internet.

    This reminded me of an old thread. Perhaps it will encourage you. It did me as I re-read it.

    http://simplycharlottemason.com/scmforum/topic/overcoming-perfectionism-in-homeschooling

    Blessings, Christie

    Kristen
    Participant

    I have the same fears at times also. I dont think we can help it! However, I too have had to STOP LOOKING at more and more books and curriculum so that I dont keep waffling on what we are doing. Not saying I dont ever make changes but for instance I use the SCM history guides and we love them. So why did I keep looking at what others use for history? All it did was waste my time and confuse me. So I quit looking.

    I am going to look up the Homeschoolers Bible though! Lol

    mrsmccardell
    Participant

    Thanks for the encouragement.  I am guilty of following up on what people are using b/c I will need some of it in the near future.  If it looks interesting I just add it to my spreadsheet for that subject.  I can forget about it until that time comes.  Half of the stuff I’ve never even heard of so then I need to figure out what I would need that for.  This makes boxed curric appealing but I know I like to plan so it wouldn’t work anyway.     

    I will agree that when I let go of that perfect vision and just dig in with what we have then it’s usually the best day.  That should be enough movtivation to keep going…but it’s not.  I’ll rely on Him to see me through.  

    Christie, that post was great.  

    Thanks again.

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