What bedtime hours do *you* keep? Your kids?

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  • I have some terrible habits! And one of them is that I certainly do not get enough sleep. I’ve been pretty proud of myself getting to bed by midnight or 12:30 (instead of 1 or 2am) the last couple of weeks but I’m working off decades of poor sleep habits and while it may be a step in the right direction, I need to be better. Currently I’m in a season of getting up around 6am…although I often crash at some point during the day.

    So…now that I have laid out this awful habit in the bright light of day for all to see…I would love to be further shamed by some of your lovely examples of what perhaps more “proper” sleep habits look like. 

    And what about your kids — what is their bedtime / wakeup time / starting school time (with ages, please)? For my 5,8,9yo: lights out at 8:45pm (which goes until 9p or a touch later too often), and they wake up between 7-7:30am most days, but because *I* am dragging so much all the time, we don’t get what I would consider a “strong start” to our day like we used to, so school work doesn’t begin until more like 9:30, which is quite ridiculous when we we’re all up for hours by then.

    Wow, typing this out makes me acknowledge that this is a much worse habit than I even realized. Up until the last year or so I could still keep these hours but I was much for effective during the day. I really want to delete this post, but I still want to see some real examples of what could be…for inspiration.

    Monica
    Participant

    My kids go up to bed around 8, but my DH reads to them until close to 9:00.  Usually the younger two (ages 5 and 4) fall asleep during the story, but the older two (12 and 8) stay awake.

    They get up at random times.  The 12 and 5YO have always been early risers.  They are up usually around 6:30.  The 8 and 4YO have always needed a lot of sleep.  They usually aren’t up before 7:30.

    As for me, well, I usually try to get in bed by 10:30 and sleep until 6:30.  This week I’ve been so tired that I’ve been falling asleep really early (I must be fighting something off).

    We start our morning readings at 9:00, after breakfast and chores are done.  My oldest usually gets some other things done in the meantime since he’s up so early (currently Minecraft Homeschool).

    We’re pretty lax about all of that because DH works from home, so we generally have a quiet morning.  Once a week we have to leave home at 8:30 for our co-op/morning mass, so that takes some planning.

    Super23
    Member

    I try to get everyone in bed by 8 and asleep by 9. The exceptions are weekends and scout nights. I try to be asleep most nights by 10, though it doesn’t always work and we wake up anywhere from 6:15 to 7:15.

    Karen
    Participant

    Well, we’re weird just right from the get-go!  My husband is a dairy farmer — long, awful hours.  So.  He’s up at 3 and out to the barn.  Our oldest daughter (9yo) is up around 6 or 6:30 to help him.  Then I’m up around 6:30 to go help.  Then dd9 and I are back in the house by about 8 to tidy up, start laundry, start making breakfast.  Around 8:30 or 9 the other 3 girls appear (8, 6, 4).  After I’m done eating, while the girls are still finishing up eating, I start reading our history or artist/composer for the day.  I’ve found that doing this helps me think that we’ve gotten a great start to school!  It’s crazy, but it helps my mindset, so we do it when I remember and we can.

    Then we do breakfast chores.  The 9yo does dishes, the 8yo takes care of laundry, the 6yo sweeps the kitchen, the 4yo fusses about picking up the school room(!).  This is when (if my brain is in gear) I start dinner and/or supper.  Then I start school with whoever is done their chore.  Sometimes I help out with someone’s chore, if it seems to be going slow or is just a bad day.

    I bounce back and forth doing independent work with each girl for a while – until about 11 or 11:30 or 12, depending on how it’s going.  Someone gets snack ready, they eat and sometimes I do computer for a bit (either prepping for school or playing) and sometimes I’ll read another something to them – our read-aloud or whatever we’re behind in.

    Then around 12:30 or 1 I take them all upstairs and we do Together Time (our Bible verses, hymn, Bible story and sometimes our read aloud).  The littlest girl and I usually need a nap.  (You’ll see why in a bit!*L*)

    Then around 1 or 1:30 (or later!) I get up and come down to start dinner, finish schoolwork with someone, computer, whatever there is to do.

    We eat dinner somewhere between 2 and 3.  3 is milking time, so my husband is out the door then.  Dd9 is out soon after, to help him.  She has this habit of staying out until I call her in (“but Daddy’s gonna need me soon”) to finish school or practice piano.  She’d rather be out than in.  Dd8 is usually out then, too.

    Around 5 I get supper going or work on a sewing project or whatever.  Around 6 or 6:30, I go out to help.  I’m usually back in by 7 or 7:30 to finish supper.  We eat around 7:30 or 8.  Then bedtime is as soon as I can get them there!  But it’s a slumber party every night, with two girls in each room.  So they often don’t fall asleep until 10:30 or so.  I usually lay in bed and read or plan school or plan sewing projects….so I don’t often fall asleep before 11 or later.  (Which is why I need that nap!!)

    LindseyD
    Participant

    Our kids are in bed by 8:00-8:30. If we put them to bed at 8:00, we let them read until 8:30 or 8:45. Dh and I go down to our room and talk, read, or watch Netflix until 10:30 or 11:00. Kids are awake around 8:00 a.m., but we allow them to read in their beds until 9:00 a.m., if they want. If not, they can get up, dress, make their beds, and unload the dishwasher. Sometimes, they’re starting on breakfast by the time I come upstairs. Dh doesn’t have to be at work until 9:30, so he and I wake up around 8:30 or a bit later. With my health issues, I have to allow myself to sleep as long as my body will let me, so it is not unusual for me to wake up at 9:00. I don’t ever set an alarm for myself. We work our day around me waking later if necessary. 

    I used to think that I wasn’t a “good” homeschooler if we didn’t start our school day by 9:00 a.m., but things have changed a lot. We keep our lives very simple and have very few outside commitments so that we don’t feel like we have to run on a rigid schedule. The flow of our day is the same everyday, but the time on the clock may vary from day to day, if that makes sense.

    Shannon
    Participant

    karen, what time does your husband go to sleep?

     

    I am trying to be in bed by 10 each night but I fail most nights.  This week my bedtimes were 9:45, 12:15 and 12:30.  I feel SO much better when I’m in bed early.  I wake at 5:30 if I’m going to Crossfit (twice a week) or at 7-7:30 if not.  I intend to get up early on my non-Crossfit days to write or plan but I tend to find sleep more important. 

    I’m a HUGE believer in the benefits of lots of sleep, I just don’t seem to get it as often as I should.  These late nights for me were bc my husband didn’t get home from work until 10:30pm and I wanted to see him and I’d also help him a bit get prepared for the next day at work.

    My 8yo’s tend to sleep from 8pm to 7 or 7:30am.  My 13g likes to be asleep between 9and 9:30 and my 16b usually isn’t asleep until 10 or 10:30.  My daughter wakes at 6:30 to get ready for public school, my 16yo son wakes at 7:15 also for public school.  On the weekends he sleeps until I wake him around 10 and my daughter wakes on her own around 8-9. 

    My problem is I want to be asleep at 10 but I still put my older kids to bed and read to them so I’m usually not finished with them until 10 and then I like to have adult time with my husband.  (I have given up the hope of having alone time for myself at night for the most part.)  I think 10:30 should be my new goal and 11:00 a hard and fast time to be in bed.

    jmac17
    Participant

    I was just thinking about the same thing this morning.  I know I need to make some changes too.

    I get up at 6:45.  The twin toddlers that I take care of everyday arrive at 7:15, and we head downstairs so my kids can sleep a bit longer.  My girls,  DD8 and DD4 usually wander down soon after.  At 8am, we go upstairs to start breakfast, and if DS6 hasn’t joined us by 8:30, I wake him up. 

    Then comes my challenging part of the day.  It is taking us until after 10am to get breakfast done and cleaned up and everyone dressed and ready for the day.  I think this is ridiculously long, but I can’t figure out how to streamline.  Everyone has a set routine posted on the wall, but they all get so distracted that I have to be constantly on top of them to get everything going.  It’s driving me crazy.

    Once we get ready, we do the ‘family’ subjects for school (devotional, our fitness program, artist, composer, etc.).  I’d like to have time for other projects, (planting seeds for our garden, etc.) but we always run out of time because the morning takes so long. (Today we skipped morning school and the kids are sitting beside me cleaning out their craft drawers to decide what to keep and what to throw, which is how I have time to be posting!)

    After lunch, the twins go done for a nap and we do our individual subjects. 

    After school/nap the kids go outside to play and I get whatever chores done that can be done while watching out my kitchen window.

    Supper is around 6.  Bedtime routine starts about 7:30, with the goal of kids being in bed by 8:30.  DD4 falls asleep quickly. DD8 reads until 9:30  (or 10 or even later if I forget to go remind her to turn out her light.  Sigh.) and then spends a long time trying to get to sleep.  She has always had a difficult time winding down, even as an infant.   DS6 also has had a very difficult time getting to sleep lately.  Starting tomorrow I’m going to wake up DS6 earlier and see if we can get his ‘fall asleep’ time earlier.  That might help the morning crunch problem too. We also need to be more active.  Being cooped up indoors most of the day has taken it’s toll.  Even when we are outside, it isn’t for as long and they aren’t as active running around when the snow is up to their hips or just solid blocks of ice.  I can’t wait until spring! 

    I try to head to bed around 10pm, but it’s usually closer to 11pm before I settle in.  This is not early enough for me (any less than 8 hours on a regular basis and I get physically sick,) which is why I need to figure out how to get everything done earlier in the day. 

    I think it’s a common problem.  There’s always more to do than there is time to do it in.

     

    Tristan
    Participant

    Ahh, bedtime.  At my house bedtime is usually done without Daddy’s help as he has to be in bed early and up in the middle of the night to go to work.  So imagine bedtime with three children age three and under, plus five not much older.  🙂  Yeah, sleep is something I wish I had more of.  Here is how it works at my house:

    8:30pm is family prayer and the following children go up to their beds with a booklight:  9yo, 8yo, 6yo, and newly turned 5yo. We turn an audio book on in the hall too. The 12yo and I are downstairs with the 3yo, 2yo, 7 month old. 

    Around 9:00pm I go upstairs to lay down with the 2yo.  Some nights the baby has already fallen asleep in my arms, though lately he’s been taking a late nap and staying up until close to midnight.  The 2yo is asleep within 10 minutes.  I go downstairs.

    If the baby is already asleep the 12yo heads to bed, if not, I take the 3 yo up and lay with him while she hangs out downstairs with the baby.  Once the 3yo is asleep (by 10pm) I’m free to go to bed, unless the baby had a late nap and is still up. 

     

    Lately that means I get to bed around 11:30pm, though I am NOT a night owl.  If little ones are asleep by 9:30pm I head to bed too.  If one of them is up until 10pm or later so am I.

     

    Mornings – I wake up between 5am and 7am depending on the season and the middle of the night demands of little ones.  I have to be up at midnight to catheterize the 2 yo who has spina bifida.  I’m usually up once or twice with the 7 month old. 

    Kids are woken between 7am and 8am depending on the needs of the day versus the need for sleep. 

    We do a daily quiet time that lasts 1 1/2 hours where everyone is in beds resting or napping, or on a couch resting or napping. 

    If a child is tired or has trouble waking in the morning consistently they get an earlier bedtime and no booklight so they can get sleep.

    amama5
    Participant

    I was almost going to start a post about this but felt silly asking about bedtime, so I didn’t, so thanks!  My son is 9, just like me, has a busy mind that won’t settle down at bedtime without reading, etc.  I stay up late and get up early, and when I lie down at night my mind won’t stop!  My son has expressed feeling the same way, he is allowed to read in bed until 9:30, but says he consistently is awake until 10:30 or 11 each night.  He said he feels crazy with energy lying there and it makes him get up later and feel grumpy (he gets up around 7:45), so he wants to read longer in bed.  I understand how he feels, but shouldn’t a 9 yr old need more sleep or should I just let him read until he’s tired?

    Karen
    Participant

    Shannon,

    my husband goes to bed the same time I do.  That’s something he insists on – he knows how much I enjoy the quiet and would LOVE to get more done!!! 🙂  So, we get in bed at the same time.  He falls asleep – immediately, usually.  On a bad night, he’ll take 2 minutes to fall asleep! I know he’s deprived of sleep.  I know it’s in my best interests to stay in bed, so I don’t usually get out of bed to do any more work.  But I do read….or sit up and plan school! *L*

    Karen
    Participant

    jmac17,

    I’ve given up trying to streamline.  What I’ve done instead is try to fit things into odd places.  Like reading history at the breakfast table.  Typically, the girls are done eating before I’m done reading.  So, they grab paper and colored pencils and draw.  Most of hte time the drawings don’t apply to what I’m reading, but at least they’re quiet and they are listening. (And can narrate quite well.)

    The worst thing about it is that I have to keep a checklist in my head and make sure that if a moment looks unoccupied I fill it with something “school”.  Sometimes that makes me grumpy.  But streamlining doesn’t work here — too many thing interrupt us.

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