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To Potty Train or Not to Potty Train…
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OK, so not a homeschooling question, but maybe you can help me out.
DS will be 3 the first week in June, and is still in diapers. I have not yet tried to potty train him for several reasons – we have gone through an international move and lots of travelling (missionaries on furlough), so are very unsettled in terms of routine right now, he hasn’t shown much interest in using the potty, and potty training my dd was a long-drawn-out-battle that I haven’t wanted to repeat. So, I kind of wanted to wait until we were more “settled” and/or he showed some kind of intitiative on his own. However, the way things are going, we aren’t going to be settled as a family again for another year or more – I’m kind of realizing that if I wait until life gets “normal” it may never happen! He’s also close to outgrowing the cloth diapers that we use (Bumgenius) – which are a one-size diaper and as far as I know not available in a larger size (not that I really want to invest a lot of money in extra large diapers either). Right now, we have a 2 month window of time where we are settled in one place, and in our own apartment. (We will then be travelling most of the summer and not really in any one place for longer than about a week at a time.) So…I’m toying with the idea of giving it a try anyhow, just to see what happens. Any thoughts? Would you try it if you were in our shoes? Or would you wait, even if it meant that he (likely) would not get potty trained until he’s 4?
Thanks,
Jen
I would go for it. If you can find a way that works well for him, it won’t take long now that he is 3. In my experience with friends kids and my own, potty training after 3 is usually pretty straight forward, fast and effective. I would just take extra precautions to ensure that it is a relaxed and pleasant experience for him. Appeal to his particular personality. It will make things easier on you once he is trained as well!
This is just my humble opinion, though, and what I would do with MY kids if I were in your situation. You know your child best, go with your gut.
-Miranda
I’d probably go ahead and try, in my experience (with 2 girls and a boy) if they are ready two months should be plenty of time to get the concept down enough for it to stick when things heat up again for you.
I’d invest in a little potty chair for him and then just take that around with you over the next year to give the process some consistency even in the midst of change. We traveled quite a bit this last year but having my son’s little potty everywhere with us meant that he transitioned between environments with very little trouble. By now he has it down pat enough that we are just using the normal toilet.
I’ve noticed with my kids the key is for ME to be consistent even if other parts of our life are in flux. :o)
I would do it when you are in a more relaxed life, if now is that time, then great – if not don’t worry, wait for that nice period of calm when moves and things are out of the way. My daughters were both about 3 1/2 when they were potty trained, it went fast and we delayed on purpose because our naturopathic pediatrician said that many people are in way too much of a hurry to potty train, and if you wait it is far more relaxed and easy. She was right, the girls learned the ropes really fast with the minimum of fuss or stress for any of us. We took a lot of flak from people who thought we were crazy, but it was a peace of cake and I am truly glad we never pressured them and waited until they were ready. Hugs, Linda
I have potty trained 4 so far and now sounds great. I will try to post more later, my 2 yo is falling asleep in my arms.
Ah, okay, now my arms are free. Here are my experiences so far (4 potty trained, 2 to go currently).
Oldest decided to potty train herself for daytimes at just turning 2. She struggled with wetting the bed until nearly 6 (it’s hereditary…sigh).
Second was a boy, he was not interested in potty training until almost 3, but then he was completely done in about 2 weeks (meaning he had no more accidents).
Third was a girl who refused to potty train from sheer stubbornness. Yep, love her. At just over 3 she knew how. We took away the diapers for daytime one day and she decided to potty from then on. She is now 5yrs 4mos and also has bedwetting issues, just sleeps deeply and never wakes up till morning. We use cloth diapers at night.
Fourth was a boy who took about 4 hours to potty train just before age 3. He had no clue what I meant, you could tell, until he peed accidentally in the toilet about mid-day. From that moment on he was done. The only trouble is still at night, he’s a bedwetter too, probably 4 nights out of 7. He wears cloth to be.
Right around 3 seems to be a great age. The biggest things are to just make it matter of fact that accidents happen. We clean up and move on. Celebrate successes. Use the time on the toilet for extra stories. 😉 They nearly all learn by the time they’re 18, right? Nobody will ask on a job interview “How old were you when you potty trained?”, so I really think if you try for a few days and it isn’t working to not stress, just go back to diapers. They’ll get it when they’re ready.
I was stressing because my 3 1/2 yr old wasn’t going, wasn’t interested, etc…I had been talking to her about it for a while – big girls go on the potty, your big sisters go on the potty, etc. She was waking up mornings dry so just needed the motivation, I had resisted a “treat” for potty, but one day I tried it. She got A skittle when she went each time that day and she hasn’t looked back! =) She has wet the bed twice in a month…she really doesn’t like the pull-up! She was completely trained in two days on her own.
I think that if he is ready, go for it! Prepare him first so it is easier…a lot of the pressure we feel as parents is a throw back to society’s need for potty-trained kids in day care. I second the keeping a potty chair close and consistency on your part. He will get it!
I think that I would probably give it a try during that 2 months and if it doesn’t work then just wait until life settles again. You could try some things to get him interested in the potty. Maybe have a book that he only gets on the potty.
My neices were potty trained within a day or two by just taking off any pants/underwear. My SIL put them in a dress with nothing underneath and after one or two accidents they were done with that!! It didn’t work with my kids. =(
When you are really ready to hit it and be on top of it, you can make sure that the potty is very handy and then give him lots to drink so he will have to go a lot and you can get him on the potty with (hopefully) success multiple times in the first day or two.
A thought on having a little potty . . . good idea. I didn’t like the little potty’s though. I got an insert that sits on the seat and makes it smaller so they can’t fall in. It is smaller and everything goes in the big potty and I don’t have anything to clean. It is smaller for transporting on trips or to other people’s houses. He won’t always have a little potty available. BUT some kids do better with a little potty. And, it can (if you have room) be taken on road trips. Then when the little guy has to go (and GO NOW) you can pull over where ever you and you will always have a potty. Of course, when my DD was little and I had to make an emergency stop on the side of the road, every time we passed that place after that she would ask “Mommy, is that pooping spot?” — “No, dear, we use the potty.”
I agree with the others…
now could someone get me motivated to potty train my almost 3yo? She turns 3 in less than a month… When she was just barely 2 she tried to self-train (she has lots of practice taking everything off, getting on the toilet with a seat (she has no interest in the actual potty) etc… but had nothing “happen”…) – but this was right when I had the new baby and had absolutely no ability to help her with it.
A few months ago I got a potty video (total twaddle) that had her interested and she attempted again and had a few successes… but then she started resisting so I stopped. I am so sick of 2 in diapers!
suzukimom – I feel your pain – we’ve had 2 or 3 in diapers at a time for the last 6.5 years, and one in them for the 2 years before that. Yuck!
A practical suggestion – check out the book The No Cry Potty Solution by Elizabeth Pantley – I like all her books. She has some info on her website too.
Thanks for the thoughts ladies! I talked with dh about it this evening and he is with me on this, so I think we will give it a go! If we really aren’t getting anywhere with it by the time we are ready to hit the road this summer, we can always go back to diapers and try again later…really, we won’t be any worse off than if I don’t try at all. We had a terrible time with my dd but some of that was personality and some of that was my expectations being unreasonable…so I’ve learned my lesson about keeping it relaxed.
I’m thinking that on Saturday, I will take him to Walmart all by himself to pick out a little potty, a package of big boy underwear, and maybe some fun stickers to make a sticker chart with which will hopefully make it seem sort of special for him from the get go. We’ll see how we go!!Thanks,
JenThe best to you Jen those are good ideas you have – hope it works for you – then you won’t have to worry any more. Linda
Go ahead and try it. My 2 oldest dds refused to train until they were 4, and then they had to because they were going to 4K! LOL My 3rd trained very easily after we moved to MN last year, so she was a little over age 3. My son… Well, I have no experience training boys, so I have sat him on the potty chair fully clothed once or twice just to see how he’d react. He’s OK with it for a couple minutes. So I think I am going to just do that once in a while as he shows interest and see where it leads. I am really hoping he will be my easiest and earliest yet! 😛 I hope your son works with you and gets trained quickly! 🙂
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