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So discouraged…
- This topic has 7 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 9 months, 2 weeks ago by
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I know all children are so different. My oldest was a very early reader and learning has always come easily to her and she enjoys learning. My youngest struggles in every subject and gets hostile when asked a question she doesn’t know. She will even run away and act like she has to do something else “real quick” and then doesn’t return. She either cannot or will not remember things we’ve gone over. She’s 13 and cannot spell and barely can do math no matter what I’ve tried. I do not ever compare them (well except I am right here right now) but she knows learning doesn’t come as easily.
I’ve seen videos on YouTube of a guy interviewing high school aged/early college age people asking them to name three countries, or who is the VP of the US, or what language do they speak in Idaho and they don’t know! My daughter is like this. She either cannot or will not listen and remember
Sooooooooo discouraged 😭
I was going to ask the same question as Tothesky. My third daughter is similar to how you describe yours, unlike her two sisters (now adults) who were similar to how you describe your older child. The older two had different styles and different interests, but neither struggled mightily with any particular subject. My third one is so different that it’s come to the point that we’re going to have her evaluated for learning differences and neurodivergence. You might consider something like that. In my experience (only speaking for myself), the avoidance has been less about rebellion and all about anxiety. Wishing you the best!
How do you get your child evaluated?
What exactly does that mean?
I don’t want her to be made to feel like something is wrong. 😢
I think you have to go through your regular doctor to get a referral to a specialist. But before you do that you could do some research to see if it’s worth it, before possibly rocking the boat with your daughter. The ADDitude website is very, very helpful.
Some children are also simply not as bright as others. It’s pretty common to have a child towards the lower end of normal intelligence. I have one- he’s precious but takes a lot longer and doesn’t retain easily. I wouldn’t trade him for anything.
My youngest DD, 16 yr, has some struggles learning. Math has been the biggest struggle. She’s not been tested but the closest thing I could find that really describes it is Dyscalculia. We’ve just gone at her pace. She is in high school but onlyat a 5th grade level in her Math. She’s at around a 7-8th grade reading level.
After talking with some teachers from various places, it was suggested to us that she could have some Auditory Processing disorder.
We’ve also researched into Irlen Syndrome. We did an online test and we were given advice to seek someone who is an Irlen diagnostic or Irlen Screener. It appears very much that this is what my daughter has.
Just some ideas of things you could research into. But the Irlen Syndrome for us was huge. We have yet to get a professional diagnosis.
Try not to get panicky about it. 🙂 I had a public school teacher encourage me that as long as they are making some progress even though at times it seems it’s one step forward and two steps back. You can’t push them and you can’t force knowledge into their heads. And sometimes for some kids, especially with auditory issues, questions will just shut them down. And sometimes they need time to process what they have read or heard and it might come out much better in a few days vs being put on the spot immediantly after supposedly learning something. As for the math part our daughter would forget the next day the simplest math facts that she knew before. We were encouraged to let her use a math chart as long as she understood the concepts. That is what worked the best for her until now she is finally able to do most of her basic math facts without looking at her chart.
Try to relax and not compare your child with your other children or anybody else. 🙂 I hope you can find some direction in how to help her with her schooling. It’s going to be alright.
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