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New to CM and in need of help with my teen
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Hello, my name is Andrea, and I am a second year homeschooler. After trying many methods and books, I am burnt out. I recently learned more and have been implementing the CM methods. My 7 year old loves our “new school”. He tolerates narration well and lives for nature study time. However, I really need help with my 13 year old. He has always struggled to articulate his thoughts. Writing is a synonym for punishment in his vocabulary.
We recently tried IEW, and that was a tortuous fail! So I shelved all of our writing curriculums so that we can take a small break. I started reading Aesops Fables, just as a starting point, and he is able, with great effort, to narrate those for me. I’m not sure where to go from this point. I have him doing some copy work and dictation from our scripture memory work, he is well grounded in math, loves his Apologia science. He is also a geography ace, and I have some science biographies on his list.
What I need help with for him is the copy work/dictation/narration work. Do his copy work and dictation have to come from a book he is reading? How does the Spelling Wisdom book play into that? If we should be using Spelling Wisdom, what level should he start with (3 looks hard, 2 looks like a maybe)? Then comes narration. We are about to begin Mystery of History Vol 1. Should I just focus on that right now for his narration? How long should he do oral before I get him into written narration? When do I introduce summarization? And when do I introduce essays? I feel like he is so far behind his peers in this area already. I feel pressed to get him caught up. He can barely write a decent paragraph, let alone a 3 or 5 paragraph essay……help
From what I have read in the CM books and from other homeschoolers, he seems to be capable of what the 9-10 year olds are capable of.
The other ladies will have more advice but to start with; if he has never narrated before it will take some time for him to get “up to level”. Give it time and just start out with short stories or as you read stop after a paragraph or half a page or half a chapter and have him narrate that, or whatever you think he can handle. Also the general rule for Spelling Wisdom is to start with the first book no matter what age. If they go quickly through the first one thats o.k. just keep going as fast or as slow as you need.
Thank you. Should I use SW for copy work and dictation? For example: have him copy a lesson on Monday, then dictate it to him on Tuesday?
Also, out of desperation, I bought Writing With Ease level 2. Do you think that would be good since I’m a newbie or really just counter productive?
We have homeschooled all along, but only started using CM methods last school year, so I feel some of your pain! My younger 2 children picked up on narration fairly quickly, but my then-16 and 15 y/o’s found it more difficult. I’ve had to take it slow but steady. We still do mostly oral narrations, which I feel is important for several reasons, including the fact that my oldest has Asperger’s Syndrome and so has struggled with speech and verbal expression all his life. I’ve had to be very patient and very, very encouraging. I’ve also had to adjust my expectations and not expect him to perform at the same level as other students his age, partly because this has been so new to him.
A word of encouragement: after several months of doing school this way, I am noticing improvements in my son’s ability to express himself verbally. Narration has become easier for all of them. It’s just not something that can be rushed.
A friend who has done CM for a very long time recommended that I start out with one written narration a week…even if it’s just a paragraph…to avoid overwhelming my reluctant writers. My daughter was actually more anxious about writing than her brother. It took a while, but eventually (over a period of several weeks) she did get less resistant and more willing to write longer narrations. The next step is to start requiring 2 written narrations per week, then eventually one per day. But for us, that’s going to be a ways off. Probably not until next school year.
As far as essay writing, I have them both doing Queen’s Language Lessons for high school, mostly because it includes dictation, creative writing, essays, poetry, and many other CM aspects. I know some people don’t think highly of Queen’s, but for us it’s been a lifesaver as they can do it mostly independently. (I know it’s weak on grammar, but my kids don’t need grammar instruction, as they already had that before switching to CM). I also like that my children like it! I know there are many other ways to cover the language arts, but for us this is working well.
Re: Mystery of History — I was using that last year for my 2 middle schoolers, and that was the book they mostlylearned to narrate with. I found it lent itself very well to using CM methods. We enjoyed it.
Mostly, I just want to encourage you that it’s okay that your son is where he is. Give him time to learn to narrate, and try to notice every little improvement. It will come, like a flower slowly opening. 🙂
Tara
I don’t know if you’ve had a chance to read any of the posts on the SCM blog, but Sonya did a series on transitioning to a CM education. Here is the link to that series:
Making the Transition to the Charlotte Mason Method
In particular, Sonya says in the second post of that series Transition to CM, Stage 1: The Basics:
“Start with oral narrations until the children (of all ages) get the hang of it. Once they feel comfortable with oral narrations, you can begin to require some written narrations from the older children (not younger than 10 years old).”
When we began to implement more of CM’s methods in our homeschool, my oldest was around 13yo as well. As far as narrations go, we spent the whole first year focusing mainly on oral narration. She did do some writing in some subjects since she was already accustomed to writing 5 paragraph essays. But as far as narrations go, we focused mainly on oral narration and then after that, began incorporating written narrations.
Edited to add: Looks like I was posting when others were posting too. So some of what I said may have already been said. 🙂
I just want to say something about Mystery of history since we have been using that last year and are on volume 2.
We did the memory cards which is a little like written narration. I find it good practice to find the main points, my oldest takes notes while he is reading, sometimes the lessons are a little too long so it is harder to narrate.
We found great living books on the guest hollow website that go along each time period. Also Winter promise uses MOH as part of their history and has really good books to go along. Those are what we use for narration.
Andrea, I can hear the frustration and desperation in your post. I suspect your 13yo may be feeling the same way. You can get this worked out and get your teen on track, but it will take a little time- it won’t happen all at once. When you are able to let go some of the worry, your son will be able to let go of some of his and things will start to improve, probably quite rapidly.
When transitioning kids from public school, or even from a frustrating home ed experience, they often need time to “deschool”, otherwise the stress and difficulty carries over from prior experiences. I have heard the rule of thumb to expect one month of deschooling for each year of previous diffcult school experience. So, I am guessing you are looking at 8ish months of time for your son to get back to a good place to begin to really benefit from education.
I know my older sons needed time to deschool when I transitioned them to more CM methods. When they felt the pressure I was feeling to “catch up” it actually made things worse.
The better choice for me was to get the foundations firm and then move forward. I would guess you have 4 or 5 years left schooling your 13yo. You can take all of that time to help him with the skills he needs. I also found that the Jr College does an excellent job of catching up any gaps that might hold them back. One of my sons is doing great in college now, honor society, and is ready to transition to the university or get his AA depending on the choices he makes in the next few months.
If this was my son, I would stop requiring much if any original writing for the time being. Keep those writing programs on the shelf! I would continue using Aesops fables or similar length pieces for oral narrations util he is able to do it easily, then slowly and gradually increase. If possible I would make it as conversational as possible so he isn’t feeling put on the spot. It may help his ability to articulate. If my younger child gets close to surpassing him, I would make sure I have them do their narrations seperately and seperate passages. The last thing a struggling older child needs is the pressure of a much younger child nipping at their heels. I learned this one the hard way with my boys!
You mentioned he has always struggled to articulate his thoughts and this process will help him improve more than anything. Don’t be concerned about spending many months or a year with this- hearing, understanding, connecting to the material and composing your thoughts so someone else can understand is higher level thinking, much more difficult than regurgitating fill in the blank answers. Build the foundation so he can expand his skills with writing successfully as he matures.
Your 13yo is a little old for copywork, but if this was my son I would start below his level so he can expereince some success before moving on to something that might be challenging. This article should help you sort out where to start with him. http://simplycharlottemason.com/2010/10/13/copywork-transcription-dictation-language-arts-part-7/ You can use passages out of books he is reading, or from Spelling Wisdom. If you have Spelling Wisdom, it is probably easiest to start there than try to find your own appropriate passages. Here is a link on how to use Spelling Wisdom http://simplycharlottemason.com/product-links-tips-info/how-to-use-spelling-wisdom/
I re-read your post- it looks like you don’t have Spelling Wisdom yet. If his spelling seems on par with a typical 8-10 yo, then I would start with book one and try a few of the lessons from the sample and see how they fit. If he is able to be successful most of the time consider trying the same on book two until you find his level.
Andrea, I would really like to encourage you to take your time finding your way and don’t let the push to “catch up” rule your decisions. In the mean time make it pleasant, work on the things you can without stress, and build your relationsip with your son. 13 and 14 can be such challenging years without any “extra” issues. When you add school challenges it can get very tough, but building on strengths and building relationships will always pay off in the end.
I have to agree with curlywhirly. I’m actually an IEW user, but our youngest will likely go through school without it because of the helpful instruction found here on the forum and at Lindafay’s website.
This link, http://www.charlottemasonhelp.com/2009/07/narration.html, offers so much encouragement on narration and the transition to composition! Read each article over time and implement when you notice readiness. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how well it works.
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