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Life Whine
- This topic has 19 replies, 14 voices, and was last updated 13 years, 8 months ago by
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Oh my goodness. I just want you to know you are not alone. Your day sounds like mine, only my kids are a little older. I think we live in the same house too. We ALL share a bedroom here because we have a baby grand piano in the other room that could be used as a bedroom. There are six of us. We have a cape cod, so our bedroom is huge and our end is separated from the kids a little. But really, it’s ridiculous. Thankfully, my kids just see the bedroom as a place to sleep. Anyway, I know how you feel-about all of it. I can’t get up early enough either, and the kids have to get breakfast. We start school so late and I’m so not ready each day.
I have to say though that when I’m getting up before them, it goes so much better. (I can sometimes do that for about a week!) I would do all I could now to try to get up before them if possible, because my younger batch of kids is behind where they really should be. I didn’t have fatigue problems when my 17 yr old was young, and he was never behind on anything. In fact, he was ahead and graduated early. I don’t mean they are behind “grade level” or some other nonsense. But they are behind what they really could be doing. And it’s hard to motivate them to do their best when I’m sure it looks like I’m not doing my best.
I decided yesterday to get rid of anything in our house that I can’t maintain. That means anything from a giant comforter that won’t fit in my washer to two long haired cats!
Anyone want two long haired cats?!!!
Anyway, I think that’ll help me a ton. We might even get to stop tripping over things all day in our tiny house. I always seem to do the most complicated thing, and it makes me tired. We spent the weekend last week with my husband’s brother. They are so clean and organized. They take it easy and are happy all the time. OK they have a huge house so there’s a place for all the stuff they own. But I don’t think that’s all. They don’t complicate things if they don’t have to. I have enough things that are complicated I can’t change–food allergies, medications, one bedroom, etc. So I’m getting rid of unmanageable things!
Yea Me!!
Oh I also wanted to say that one thing that can work for chores is “5 minute chores”. I put chores on a slip of paper in a baggie and they draw one out and spend 5 minutes on it before school. It’s like a race. You can get an amazing amount of work done in 5 minutes if you concentrate.
Also, I loved blue j’s ideas–thanks to her.
Good luck!
Oh my, you all sound just like me…a few years ago. Last night I was lying in bed listening to my quiet house. Really, really believe it is just a season! Declutter the junk, focus on who these little people are, and what God may have in store for them. learning instruments is a gift- so if you are giving them that gift why not just focus on that? Do they like it? You can read about the early lives of composers, find out how violins are made, listen to music during an enforced “quiet” time while they look at books and you get to breathe:) My two at home now are 11 and 16, I have 3 more grown and gone, and my house feels empty!
Looking back is always easier, and there were many, many days when I felt like I had blown it big time! But you know what? they are all beautiful people who are a pleasure to be around and who have a curiosity for life. My eldest daughter just moved from here (Canada) to New Zealand to get her degree in midwifery! This from the girl that HATED science, squishy things, and hospitals…she never took a science ‘course’ til 12th grade and then because she wanted too, she read, enjoyed life, drove her two brothers crazya nd vice versa. Just give yourself permission to revel in who God created these children to be. You might be surprised:) Maybe one of them wants to write a song, maybe one just wants to build a castle in the snow? You may have budding things growing that you aren’t even aware of. I guess my message is , the stuff is just stuff. Don’t feel bad if you need a break or you are tired- I bet you ARE tired, I remember being always tired when mine were all small. So get a basket of books and read for an hour, or a half hour, in the middle of the day, or whenever..
I do agree with the crockpot meals, total gift from God that piece of equipment, also the fresh air when you can. Where we live we don’t get snow but it POURS rain for about 4 months straight in the winter..it can be a challenge. Most of all, realize God put you there for a reason and your babies are that reason. I highly recommend Sonyas Laying Down the Rails book! I came to it late and it still helped me, mostly with myself since I am a late riser too and hate the feeling of playing catch up with myself all day, lol. I think we all fall prey to the master of deception, and sometimes, you just have to tell him to take a hike, you are making music with your children!
I so hear you! Life is like that most often during the winter around here. I finally realized that (my sister is going to laugh her head off when I admit this out loud!) that exercise and a supplemental boost of vitamin d3 helps me. This winter has been nasty and so we haven’t had as much sun as we need. The vit d3 helps with depression and tiredness before it becomes toooo much. Other things I think of is less is more; even if something is still good, but we are not using it, maybe some one else could use it more. My dh is a “hoarder” (in a nice sense) and so I can’t always declutter. Also, I have became good friends with my timer. I set it for 15 minutes and we all run through our assignments – I am always amazed at what can actually be done in 15 minutes.
The good news is it does pass.
I also wanted to say thank you for you! I have been reading the posts for a while and loving them. You have always been a good support and resource for us. You are doing an extremely difficult thing in this day and age – you are following the commandment God gave us to love and nurture our children. You are obviuosly doing that well – even if it doesn’t seem like it. I admire you! Keep your head up. The journey just starts with a step!
@jessica2002 – My 11yo ds is high-functioning autistic, so I was wondering how your 8yo handles chores. We have kept chores rather simple for my son, but he can vacuum carpets, use the dustbuster on the steps, and do a variety of other things….but he doesn’t always do them well and takes great offense at being supervised or corrected about these things. We didn’t have him wash dishes until about a year ago, partly because I knew he would break things (he tends to “bang” things around when he’s being stubborn) and I just did not have the time to separate things. Nearly a year later, he still does a horrible job most of the time.
I’m just wondering how chore-training has been with your autistic child. It seems more like very long-term endurance training on my part!
Sue
sue_mom23 — My 8 yr old doesn’t handle chores well. He tries to avoid everything. I have gotten him to help clean up toys that are on the floor, with good results — but only in the last month or so. He doesn’t have anything that he is required to do, yet, because I’m just not too sure what to let him do by himself. He is on the border of low/mod functioning — at about a 3.5-4 yr old level of cognitive function and so I’m not sure what should be required of him in this area. He does take him dishes off the table after dinner and puts them in the sink, gets himself dressed (most of the time), too. He has a low attention span, it seems and has gross & fine motor delay.
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