Dealing with pressure to push kids

How timely …

I agree with the great advice given to you above.  I was a late reader.  I quickly caught up in 2nd grade and read well above level ever since.  I even majored in Literature!!  🙂   Keep reading out loud and have a variety of forms of literature around – poetry books, plays, short stories, magazine articles, etc.  Some times you catch a reader on something sort of twaddly (not the examples I gave exactly) and then they’re hooked and jump readily to the meaty, living books.

Here’s my story du jour …

I recently decided that my children were not doing Math at a level that seemed comparable to their homeschooling peers.  As a result I took my fears and uncertainties and pushed them hard in Math for a month; insisting they do more than a reasonable lesson and I admit to being less than pleasant about the whole thing too.  Naturally, they rebeled and tears and frustration were not an uncommon scene around here during that subject.

What a total waste of our precious time together!  And what a total failure on my part not to see “comparison” as the monster it really is before following this path. What as I thinking I would accomplish this way?

Tonight I spent a long evening going over my frustrations and fears with my husband (who happens to have dedicated his life’s work to public education ha ha).  I asked his opinions.  I spread it all out on our bed for him to see.  I took him through the past month’s lessons and the results.  After a lot of great discussion he helped me see the error of my ways (and some areas where things were going very well too) and opened my eyes to the level of stress and well, anger this method was causing the kids.  Thank God for this man to balance me!  To save me from myself! We came up with a better strategy and are going to team teach this subject to ease my worries even more.  It sure takes the pressure off!

One of the hardest things is not comparing our children to others.  I have to remember that we’ve chosen a path that is unique to our family and our unique children.  We have clear goals for them, for their futures. 

I honestly think maybe that’s what got me flustered and frantic in the first place … worrying that on the “outside” or the “real world” they will indeed be up against their peers from all backgrounds.  Will they be prepared enough?  Competitive enough? 

Whew!!  This is a tough area for me.  I’m sure one I’ll face again but hopefully not?!  😉