Name: Thrive! NCHE Convention
Start: 2024-05-23T00:00:00-05:00
End: 2024-05-25T23:59:59-05:00
Location: Winston-Salem, NC

Tagged: habits

This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 11 months ago by Sara B..

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May 16, 2011 at 3:39 pm
suzukimom
Participant
Ok, I know that habits is one of our weaknesses in my family, and I know this is a habit issue.
My kids leave books all over the place. And, once again we have a library book that I can’t renew anymore, that can’t be found anywhere. My husband is tired of this happening (and so am I) because I really don’t want to buy the book (at an inflated rate to boot) that we can’t find.
We have a “library book box” that library books are supposed to be kept in (which they do use… but not consistantly)
How do you keep track of books etc… without making a lot more work for me, the parent? My husband is almost ready to say “no library books”.
(The older 2 kids do have their own library cards now, and in theory will pay any fines etc… but as they really don’t have any source of money not sure how it will work if we get to it. The book we are missing was chosen by the 2yo, and is therefore on my card… but it wasn’t necessarily lost by her”
May 16, 2011 at 4:01 pm
houseofchaos
Participant
I hear you with this one.
When this became a problem for us, it was a symptom of a bigger issue (as you already mentioned). We paid the fines once with the warning that if we had to pay them again, there would be no library books for a certain period of time. Perhaps you could have your children do extra chores to pay for the fines? We didn’t try this, but there is no reason why it may not work.
They each have a small shelf to keep their library books in. They must be kept there when they are not being read. If I find them on the floor they are confiscated and the child has no library books until our next visit (this is really not a big hardship because our home library is decent). I find they are old enough for this responsibility by about the age of four. Before that, I am in charge of the books (but I still have them put the books on the shelf, I just don’t expect them to remember to do it all by themselves). They may only take out two books from the library at a time. Older kids who have proven they can look after books are allowed more.
This may sound drill sergeant-y, but eight kids with bad habits would put me over the top 🙂
I find if I am keeping my things in their place, the kids are better at it too. When everything is (reasonably) tidy, it is easier to notice something out of place….
May 16, 2011 at 4:13 pm
Sara B.
Participant
We have trouble keeping things picked up, as well, though I am very picky about library books, and they don’t even leave a certain room anymore. I think it’s going to be more work for you no matter what, because it’s an obedience issue (as are most things). Lay out a ground rule, and follow that rule so very consistently. For example, if your rule is library books must stay in the living room, the moment you see someone with it outside of the living room, the consequences kick in. No warning, because they’ve already been warned of the rule. I spank for disobedience, but I know that is different in other families. Whatever you choose, stick with it. They will get the idea after a few days or a week. And then stick with it still! Because this is when they will see if they can get away with it, even just a tad.
I have found this to work better if you are working on all obedience issues at once, rather than one particular specific rule. I have read “Raising Godly Tomatoes” several times, and I try hard to implement that. It has been awesome, when I’ve done it consistently. When I haven’t, it has not worked, which the author warns of. 🙂