Name: CHEC Rocky Mountain Homeschool Conference
Start: 2025-06-12T00:00:00-05:00
End: 2025-06-14T23:59:59-05:00
Location: Denver, CO

Tagged: unschooling

This topic has 22 replies, 13 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 10 months ago by mband.

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February 5, 2013 at 1:46 pm
caycecronk
Member
Have been reading many books this year since it being my first year homeschooling to help inspire me and help me grasp a larger picture of the homeschooling world. All different ways of homeschooling all capture me and I find something I like and dislike about all the methods. OF course we are currently doing our own twist on charlotte mason method but am reading a book on unschooling! Just was wandering what your thoughts were on unschooling and how you felt from a christian perspective on this method of teaching or shall I say NOT teaching since the child does most of the teaching himself!
February 5, 2013 at 2:53 pm
eawerner
Participant
I don’t know if this will really answer your questions (and I haven’t researched much on unschooling), but CM encouraged spreading a feast before children, not forcing every child to regurgitate the same information. They make their own connections with the rich life and and experiences they are given. So in a way you are controlling what they learn by choosing the best possible materials to bring into your home, but in a way they are controlling what they learn by making their own connections with those materials. I don’t think it’s a bad or stifling thing to be choosy about what we expose our children to. I also think that children (and adults!) don’t always know how much they will enjoy something until they are forced to try it. A certain topic may sound dull at first but end up more interesting than anything else you have studied. 🙂
The life of a Christian is filled with battling our sinful nature and making ourselves do what is right through the work of the Holy Spirit. Sometimes we don’t want to do something, and it isn’t fun or interesting, but we still must do it. Sometimes that is another load of laundry, sometimes it is being kind to someone who isn’t kind to us, sometimes it is going to work when you would rather be fishing, sometimes it is reviewing our math tables.
So there is both sides to the story. CM methods leave so much room for savoring the topics we find facinating while gaining some basic knowledge many areas. Our Christian faith tells us that working hard in all areas of our lives glorifies God, and our joyful and willing attitude in situations(subjects!) that are more frustrating is a witness of the work of the Holy Spirit in our hearts. 🙂
Hope that makes sense and at least sort of speaks to your questions. 🙂
February 5, 2013 at 3:02 pm
momto2blessings
Participant
I agree with @eawerner.
I think a CM education is better able to help kids pursue interests because they are exposed to a wide variety of subjects and the days are generally shorter than using a strict ‘classical’ or textbook schedule. I haven’t read much on unschooling, but I think to do it well would require a lot of work for mom. I think you can also incorporate choices into a CM education….like what science topic to cover or what history era. And I also agree that sometimes we just have to buckle down and do things we might not like to do…and that’s good character building. One thing I would fear w/total unschooling is my kids might get used to the idea of only studying what they want to and as they age and NEED to study certaing things I might be get resistance from them:) But, as I said, I haven’t read much on unschooling, so take w/a grain! Blessings, Gina
February 5, 2013 at 3:12 pm
journey1000miles
Participant
You didn’t mention which unschooling book you are reading, but there are books about Christian unschooling. A lot of unschoolers practice ‘strewing’ (the mom purposefully places educational materials based on the child’s interests or areas they might want to cover), which reminds me of CM’s ‘spreading a feast.’ Other unschoolers are completely child-led. We’re like you – scoping out all of the options but settling on CM as being the best fit for our family, long-term goals, and my own teaching style. 🙂
February 5, 2013 at 3:25 pm
NJcountrygal
Participant
I too read many books before and after we started homeschool. Some of the books I read we’re about unschooling.
My thoughts on unschooling is that it is something that might be necessary for a short time if you are transitioning from regular school to homeschool or in the very early years. Unfortunately, some use this method as an excuse to not teach at all. In my humble opinion, most unschooled children I have met have lacked any kind of self discipline. With out self discipline, I find it hard to believe that they could educate themselves properly.
That being said, I am not totally against unschooling. I believe that if the parents have the character and ability to teach their dc the discipline of self teaching that there is nothing wrong with a child directing themselves in their own education.
My daughter went to school in kindergarten and it was during that time that we realized there had to be a better way. When we started HS the following year, she would get very upset anytime she felt pressure to perform. We decided that for a time we would make learning something that did not resemble school at all. I say we unschooled her the first year even though we were still giving her an education. My goal is for my dd to be able to educate herself when she gets older.
CM is the closest thing to unschooling IMHO. It is vastly different than traditional. It teaches the discipline and joy of self educating.
February 5, 2013 at 3:34 pm
chocodog
Participant
   IMA-I think of it more as there are two types of unschooling. guided and unguided schooling. I am assuming you are thinking of unguided. You really have to set up things for them to do anyway. Some say you don’t “unguided” but I found that if you don’t they want to do things like play on the computer and TV if you have it around. I guess if they want to be a computer person all their life then maybe that is good. When they suggest that you get them the materials you should probably have them on hand or be quick to get them. If you don’t get them right away or don’t have access to them right away then you may loose their interest. I have a friend that was using this method and when I pulled my children out of school I did this for a little while. I found that I needed to guide them because they would play all day. Now play is a good thing but it was becoming quite disruptive. We had gone with a box curriculum and that was good except my perfectionist son really hated it. This is when I learned about learning styles. 🙂 Homeschooling is a learning process. For a parent as well as a child. I think life is just that way. We look for the best way to teach our young children, their styles, fun things to do ect.. We always have to keep growing. You just have to look at what is good for yourself, child and family and situation. I am so glad I was turned on to SCM by a friend. It was what we were looking for. SCM seems to me like a guided unschooling. 🙂 We have an agenda but it is more layed back like unschooling however we are guiding what they learn. So, I hope I don’t offend anyone by calling SCM a guided unschooling but this is just my opinion on how to explain it if someone wants to do unschooling. I don’t just turn my kids loose without guidance only because I think they should be prepared. I know they say they will catch up but forbid you and hubby dies. Where will they be then? They may be stuck in a ps and they will be behind and I would hate to think that they wouldn’t have the skills for the grade level they have to function at. Is that really the time when you want a child to start new things? So, with that said I hope I answered some of your thoughts on the subject. I myself am not against unschooling I just think that they can learn at their own pace but guide them in that direction.
     I have seen a large family recently that had gone threw a divorce. The kids were put into ps. They were behind by at least 2 years. There was nothing that this mom could do. It wasn’t her fault that her husband chose a different life that didn’t include them. This has changed their schooling for the rest of their lives. I felt bad because I heard some of the other people talk poorly of this woman. I believe if she was able to carry out her job all of those children would have been fine by the time they were in/out of High School. However, because of one tragedy they were looked poor upon.
This is only my opinion and I know there are others out there that have done fine with Unschooling. That is great. I however don’t think it is the best option for myself. It maybe what you are looking for. I just want to give you my thoughts on the subject at hand.
   Blessings!
February 5, 2013 at 3:39 pm
chocodog
Participant
LOL While I was writing I didn’t read the two posts that were written above mine. See I am glad I am not the only one that feels this way about CM being close to unschooling… Thanks ladies I am glad I am not the only one that feels this way. 🙂
February 5, 2013 at 9:55 pm
Claire
Participant
This is cool … just seeing a discussion of unschooling and CM!
I love them both and have commented or advocated for them on here before in my posts or responses. I think they blend beautifully as long as you can relax a little on both. At least that has been my experience so far. If you are a person who is very rule bound or schoolish (enjoy the feel of planned curriculum and school like environment or hours) then it’s probably going to be hard to accept the premise of unschooling or of blending the two philosophies. However, the rich choices of a CM education really open themselves to an unschooling enivronment. i was made espcecially aware of this after reading some of Charlotte’s own writings.
I don’t think I’d ever be able to totally abandon all structure for a radical unschooling approach. I have found it works best for my children if they are involved and interested in what they are learning. And if there are reasons behind learning it too. Learning just for the sake of test taking, or someone else’s idea of what’s worthy doesn’t fly with us. Luckily there is an endless supply of information out there to be learned and investigated!
The forum here tends to focus on schedules and plans a lot, but there are those of us on here who are following a much more relaxed form of CM that still accomplishes or mirrors the philosophy of a CM education. They just tend to be more quiet!
I do want to mention something that has now happened to me in two states in regards to unschooling groups/forums/etc – I’ve thought that my relaxed approach to unschooling would be well accepted and so I’ve tended to jump right in with those folks and declare our family sort of an unschooling family. Whoa! Did I ever meet with resistance (and I use that word over other harsher words I could use) to our version of unschooling. I was told on several occasions that “you are not unschoolers!” Apparently I’ve yet to find the unschoolers who have room for those of us who are not radical or who might adopt a variety of philosophies and approaches. I’m still searching.
Interestingly enough, when I read John Gatto’s work (which many think of as an unschooling approach) I did not get this extreme veiw of unschooling at all. In fact I got something very similar to what you are attracted to and what we practice. A respect for the child as a person, a respect for learning in all its forms and fancies, a turning away from the popular culture behavoirs and mentalities and a real push for “real life” learning in practical and meaningful ways.
I had the same experience with Mary Griffith’s book – the unschooling handbook – too. Not a lot of “don’t do anything, ever that resembles school or blatant learning” but more of an idea that there is so much wonderful learning out there for our children and that we should think of everything we do every day as what it is: learning. Everything we do teaches us something – small or large, important or unimportant.
I think we do this most effectively and best when we determine for ourselves what the “goal” is and then, keeping that in mind, walk forward with baby steps being unafraid to go backwards, swing around, do a square dance and come full circle on occasion!! Really our attitude as parents and as learners goes a long way in how our children approach their educations. If we are happy, enthusiastic and rearing to go … how can they not follow suit (most of the time anyway!)?

February 5, 2013 at 10:24 pm
nebby
Participant
I have done a post on unschooling:
http://lettersfromnebby.wordpress.com/tag/unschooling
While I think true unschooling is unbiblical, if I couldn’t do CM I would do a modified version of unschooling.
Nebby
February 6, 2013 at 12:51 am
ServingwithJoy
Participant
I think many people mistake some of the CM philosophies (the child as a distinct person, the development of character through living books, the study of practical skills) FOR unschooling. But it is absolutely not the same method – at all.
Basically, my understanding of unschooling is that it is completely child-led. I think this is a distorted view of the parent/child role and leads to many authority issues in the children I have been exposed to who have been educated this way. They resist authority, resist hard work, resist any of the demands that the rest of society will surely place on them.
Too often, unschooling becomes an excuse for ‘sloppy schooling’. I can’t forget the conversations I have had with unschooling moms, who tell me that thier kids are learning TONS from watching cartoons, how much they enjoy getting up at noon, and that they aren’t at all concerned that their 13 year old hates to read and write. I am sorry, but that is simply neglect of a child’s education, and isn’t ‘homeschooling’ at all.
I think we all want our kids to follow their own interests, but to put them in the teacher’s chair too soon is an act of foolishness, IMHO. Charlotte’s opinion was that children were born ‘persons’ – that they should be cared for, appreciated, and respected. But she did not advocate putting the children in charge of their own education. They simply aren’t ready for that level of responsibility…until they are educated and trained to be!
Sadly, most of the parents I know who have ventured down the ‘unschooling’ road have deeply regretted the damage it did to their children – educationally and morally.
Of course, this is only my subjective experience. But I would not be at all surprised if it was the general experience of Unschoolers.
February 6, 2013 at 12:56 am
ServingwithJoy
Participant
Wanted to point out, though, that it is wonderful that you are researching the different homeschool philosophies NOW – when you are beginning. So many people spend years just following the path that they see everyone else following…and it doesn’t work for them or for their kids. For us, the CM method is a wonderful fit…but I have freinds who would never leave the Classical method, or unschooling, or whatever! It is just great to understand the reasons you are teaching the way you are – not just following in a well-worn and thoughtless path unhappily.
February 6, 2013 at 3:50 am
Sonya Shafer
Moderator
This blog post might add to your understanding of the similarities and differences between Charlotte Mason and unschooling.
February 6, 2013 at 3:54 am
Claire
Participant
Bad parenting is bad parenting. Lazy parenting is lazy parenting. Neither are limited to any one philosophy of education. And sadly both are somewhat rampant.
Charlotte Mason is not unschooling. I’m not ignorant of what CM is, nor do I think the two are the same thing! I simply mean to point out that the two philosophies work well together in some aspects and are not at total odds with one another. Unschooling is clearly a largely misunderstood philosophy. Not unlike CM. Many people think all CM consists of is a lot of reading of books and playing tea party.
From my readings on unschooling it seems largely a reactive philosophy to the institutionalized nature of schooling. Not unlike most homeschooling philosophies, at least in some part. I read it to mean that children are not autobots too. So while I don’t say that the two ideas of “person” as expressed by unschooling and CM are the same … I simply see that both philosophies support the idea that children are whole people and not vessels to be filled up with knowledge by others, but rather people to be made excited and inspired by all the rich and wonderful texts (as in CM) and various things (as in unschooling). The end result being that they respect and love learning and are well prepared to do just that in their adult lives.
I really don’t think you can say nothing is learned by a certain activity. Even if you find the activity horrible itself. Something is always being processed, taken away, ingested, digested, mused about, etc. etc. An activity we do in our homeschooling might seem ridiculous to you but for my individual children it may be a great way for them to learn to a particular thing. Different learning styles/interests sometimes lead to vastly different learning materials. Learning is not limited to learning something good and useful. We also learn what is not good and not useful through our activities and daily lives.
I think that unschooling (any philosophy I’ve heard of to date) can be a beautifully Christian choice. I don’t see why it needs to be a philosophy where you avoid all parenting. Where does that come from anyway? Maybe a lot of misunderstanding comes from the discipline side of things? If you have a household that is in chaos, it will not matter what you choose – it will be a mess for everyone involved! Good order of the home and good “rails” are a necessity to any successful homeschooling adventure. I think you can act as a loving, Christian parent and still unschool. Are you going to stop housing and feeding your children if you choose unschooling? No, of course not. So why would you stop teaching them through faith how to behave and how to live? Why would you stop having a healthy parent and child hierarchy in your home and schooling? You would not.
The phiosophy of unschooling is not a free for all nor does it imply that you are univolved in your child’s life. If that is what has been shown to you then that is a poor example. There are many poor examples of families who have chosen Charlotte Mason too. And poor examples of every philosophy of homeschooling out there. There are great examples of unschooling too.
Ultimately CM works as our best “main” philosohpy and I don’t mean to be the super advocate for unschooling, but I just cringe when another philosophy is so demonized. I’ve very much enjoyed the reading I’ve done on other philosophies and I like being open to learning new things wherever I find them. I am always learning new things about homeschooling and I don’t think you need to get it all figured out by day one and feel it’s never to be changed again either!
February 6, 2013 at 5:12 am
anniepeter
Participant
When you farm or are on overload with LIFE…unschooling happens on it’s own. We’ve never tried to unschool, but we’ve had years that were largely that. When there is a lot of LIFE happening, they learn really important things that you can’t get when you are schooling – out of necessity. It would be a bad deal for us to unschool now. We live in town and life is pretty low-key. But in past years we milked and fed 200 plus goats with our kids at 9 and 11 doing a LARGE part (most) of the work, then we had a few years of haying (and hauling) around 100 acres (not much land when you do corn perhaps, but for a couple of kids to make hay 3 times a year with just a little help from Dad when he’s not working in town…it means haying more than not!). Unschooling happened! Nothing else was doable at that point. But what they learned those years was invaluable. They really know how to work. They appreciate free time. They know what things cost and what hardship is to a much greater extent than many in our country. In other years we’ve tried to spread the feast a little more and faster to make up “lost” time…but I would not trade the one for the other. We needed both. I sometimes wonder if my younger kids will get this opportunity even though they may get a “better education” – I doubt they’ll be better prepared for life. So, that’s another .02!
February 6, 2013 at 2:21 pm
caycecronk
Member
Wow, thanks for all the great responses! This has really been a truly learning year for me as a homeschooling mom! I have read so many methods and always find myself coming back to the Charlotte Mason method. Then again I can see how the unschooling can kind of happen on it’s own. I think for my kids….giving them direction is what they are craving right now as long as I give them a chance to be free and a chance to seek things for themselves as well. The thing I like about CM is that it is very gentle and they have the afternoons free to seek out those things that they are interested in or to play! From a christian perspective I feel that the bible tells us as parents to TEACH our children so we should be leading them to a large extent but also standing back and respecting them for who they are. So many things to think about! Im getting ready to read the second volume of the CM volumes as well….so I have much learning to do myself. You guys are great!