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Where does "homeschool vision" meet "reality"?
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Hi all,
We have five children, ranging from K through 12th, and have been homeschooling for 14 years. Mainly we have done literature style learning, but in the last few years I find I am more and more weary, feeling like I can’t do it as well as when I had only one or two and they were smaller. I am drifting more toward textbooks to feel like we got our day accomplished. I am also growing concerned that my distaste of quizzes, tests, and textbooks might not serve them well if they decide to go on to college. I don’t want to make an idol of a learning style, but I do want to prepare my children for whatever the Lord may have for them. My oldest has always been such a self taught, self inspired learner, but some of my others are definitely very different.
I’m sure many other factors come into play here…a special needs child with frequent doctor appointments, a very, very active 5 year old boy, myself being 46 and feeling changes happening, the list goes on.
My children don’t hate the textbooks; in fact, they kind of like them. The literature-based homeschool mom in me cringes a bit, thinking that I have not instilled something in them, or perhaps I have made a bit of an idol of the method of homeschooling. I have flip-flopped so much in the last two or three years, changing curriculum, I just don’t know anymore if I can settle in on anything anymore. In a big picture, they have had a very broad sampling of materials, but in our day to day routines of things, it has made for too much confusion.
I could use some solid advice on connecting the dots, remembering the big picture, and refocusing on the future.
I empathize. I had a year like that too – flip flopping around with scheduling our days, not so much with curriculum. I think you are right to see it as result of multiple things going on in your life. At least that was my experience.
So here is my suggestion. I hope I’ll find this post if I go through this again!! 🙂 It was a tough time for me/us.
i would suggest you take some time off; a complete break/stop of schooling. If you need to have an exam right where you are and then stop. I wouldn’t make too much of a fuss with the kids about it. I’d just say we’ve decided to take a term break here and now. Then pick a date when you’ll start back. Have the kids reading free choice books, playing, doing holiday stuff, deep cleaning their rooms, etc.
Stop and take a good look at the schedule you have going. And the materials. Then clean your bookshelves and desks and wherever else you hold school things. As you clean, look at everything closely. What do you want to keep and what is your wish list? Can you sell some to buy others? Etc. If you have text books … what CM style books would take their place and do you have those?
At the same time, read all the CM you can get your hands on. Let yourself have the time to really rethink what you want most and why. This renews us and lets us see that we don’t opperate in a static world of homeschooling. Life is always changing. We have to keep our core CM strong and go forward without questioning that aspect. Think of this way: that is one less decision or thought you need to worry about!
Use the SCM guide to write out what your goal is for each child’s education for the next year. Because you are right to see that they will be different. No two children really learn exactly alike. That might mean that one is on a far more independent schedule than another.
I hope something in this helps!
Hi there, just wanted to quickly jump un to say that if you feel like it is necessary to have a few tests to help them get a feel for it, you can always pick up a “standardized test prep workbook.” That might help you get the bug nippied that is bothering you. I wholeheartedly agree with Claire’s thoughts. Even if it is just an afternoon or two reading cm materials and planning just to see what might need to be changed in your plans and to gain some inspiration. 😉
I don’t see any problem with combining the two, especially as the kids get older. It will be a good college prep for them, but still maintain the living books and literal education you love. Just this year my 13-year-olds have started working through a science textbook on their own. They enjoy it, and the freedom that comes with doing their work when they want to. They still read lots of living books for literature and history and science and nature study and such, but for one class, they have a textbook. Sometimes I add living books relating to the topic, sometimes it’s totally different (they’re studying chemistry and they read a book about astronomy or whatever), and sometimes I don’t have a science book going but have them reading geography. As they get older more of their work will take on that ‘textbook’ look and feel, but it might actually be a list of books to read and papers to write. It will still be following a ‘plan’ or ‘syllabus’ so they learn to do a certain amount of work in a certain amount of time.
You can have a very full and fulfilling CM literature day, and one of just textbooks, or a combination. Don’t worry about how you ‘have to’ or ‘should’ do it….do what works for your family in the way that works for your family.
I put off doing a Book of Centuries for years because I couldn’t find the PERFECT one. We just started them this year (with an imperfect book). Huge connect-the-dots moment for my kids. Everything is fitting together for them now. We make sure to add the composers, artists, scientists and such as well.
I also sit down with them every 6 months and ask them how school is going, what they want to do when they grow up, what they want to learn, how they want to learn it, etc. We sometimes shift focus or add/take away subjects based on what they say. They also help choose the books we use (but I have ultimate veto or approval power).
Too often we feel pressure to be the perfect CM homeschooler, but in reality, you need to do what you can do, and what you can cheerfully and realistically do. Make sure to involve the Lord in your decisions and then let the rest go. Hand the doubt and worry and fear over to Him.
Thank you all so much for your heartfelt and empathetic responses. Even after I wrote out my thoughts, I began to feel more motivated. We have had many life changes over the past two years and I am probably my own worst enemy when it comes to feeling overwhelmed…I know that I let worry take its hold and shift my focus. I’ve been thinking I could really use a weekend-long seminar right about now. It’s interesting, though, I’ve been sharing with some moms of our co-op and a few of them are having doubts as well (probably as we look at our older children), whether the method is the best fit or even homeschooling. I think it’s just a true testimony of how much we care about our children, to know the awsome responsibility that the Lord has laid before us.
I like the advice of stopping and re-grouping. I think we’ll plan on a nice long Christmas break! Thank you all again!
I am so glad we helped! I wanted to add that while I don’t totally poo poo the use of texts or alternative methods for homeschooling, I do think that the philosophy of CM is the best.
I wholeheartedly agree with the above posts and wanted to add that I have had my moments of doubts, flip-flopping and just plain paralysis (just can’t seem to do anything!). I *think* what has helped me is to make that very basic decision and then just do it. I know that sounds cliche, but that’s what I *had* to do or I was going to go crazy and my dc were jumping ship. I had to decide on a method, which is CM (and I feel is the best, too, for my family), and get started. I have had to go back to the basics (when I get dizzy with all the choices out there) and start over. Sometimes that means taking a short break to get things organized, clear the shelves, the mind, etc., and redesign our daily schedules. I have a problem with things being “perfect” before I can start them, so that compounds the situation, and I have to work hard to not let that stop me from doing “whatever” we need to do: experiment, lesson, project.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with using tests/quizzes/textbooks if they have a purpose in what you are doing/teaching and you keep them in their proper place. They can be very valuable, or not, depending on the child and the situation. I use them from time to time so that my dc are comfortable with the layout, trick questions, using the process of elimination, and finding gaps that can be filled in quickly (we use Study Island and they like it).
With the older children, I have to just keep in mind that we just have to keep going. My oldest is not a strong “bookworm” kind of kid, but he does his work, has read many books, and has more in his “tool bag” than I did at his age. Looking back on my own education helps to keep things in perspective (and, yes, I still have doubts). I can’t remember anything! Or, I should say, I can vaguely remember 2 subjects/experiences in school, that’s it! Sad, but true. I’m not suggesting that my dc will remember everything but they certainly have more enjoyable experiences/books read than I ever did.
I have no idea if this is making sense, I’m a bit distracted right now. I hope you have a nice break and come back refreshed, not only for your dc but for yourself as well. I think we’ve all “been there” and understand where you’re coming from.
Just had one more thought …
I don’t think you need to aim to be the “perfect CM homeschooler” since that doesn’t exist. I do however think that a difference should be drawn between the philosophy of education you choose and the materials you use. To my way of thinking those are totally different things. One describes your overall guiding principals about the education you want your children to receive. The other describes the nitty gritty on what you will use to accomplish it. I really don’t think using different materials (books, texts, experiments) is changing your educational philosophy.
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