When Your 4 Year-Old Wants More

To me there is a difference between ‘formal school work’ and teaching a young child what he wants to know. As long as you are following the child’s lead, and not asking him to do lessons when he is not interested, I believe it is okay.

For example, two of my children were fluent readers by age 4 1/2. I don’t think I couldn’t have stopped them from learning to read if I had wanted to. My daughter would plead with me to “Play the letter game” that she had invented. My part was to think of new words, and then she would tell me the letters they started and ended with.  She had learned the letter sounds playing on the Starfall website. She also started asking about words in her life – cereal boxes, stores, street signs, etc. I would point to the words as I read books to her and she would follow along. One day my husband and I just realized that she was reading.  The key, however, was that it was something that she decided to learn, not that I decided to teach.

So, to answer your questions: No, I would not go ‘head first into formal education.’  For me, that would make it too easy to slip into requiring the child to do the lessons that I had planned, which is what you don’t want at this age.  Just focus on providing experiences and answering questions.  Do things that develop all the preschool type skills – fine motor activities (colouring, cutting, picking up small objects), gross motor activities (running, jumping, climbing), opportunities to observe and describe (explore nature and the world around you.) Some of the “Enrichment’ studies topics are great at this age as well: listen to good music, look at art together, PLAY with craft materials (no specific expectations as to the products).  And of course READ good books and discuss them.

And answer questions.  If he asks about words, spelling, letter sounds, etc. answer that specific question and then leave it. If he wants to know how many days until his birthday, show him how to figure it out on the calendar. Show him how you know what day of the week it is and how to know how many days until Saturday. If he asks the time, show him how you read the clock. Don’t expect him to do it, just show him what you do. If he asks, show him how you figure out that it is 45 minutes until Dad gets home. There are so many things that can be taught without ‘Formal Lessons.’

Have fun!