Too old fashioned? Need wisdom please!

My first thought is that you are not being unreasonable at all.  As parents we must each decide what is appropriate for our own families.  We don’t have teens yet, but as youth workers my husband and I have seen the devistation that electronic devices have had on many young lives.  Because of this, we will not have any device in our home that does not have a monitoring program and filter.  We even have data blocked on our non-smart phones so as not to receive any pics that are inappropriate.  I have had to become very savvy at monitoring, because I want to protect my family.  All that being said, you have to decide how much your family can handle.  If something doesn’t feel right, don’t get it.  We have an enemy that will stop at nothing to destroy!  I don’t think you can be to cautious!!!

Besides a family computer, we do have a Kindle with Wifi only, and we are considering an Ipad in the future.  The Ipad would not be used by dc unless they were in the same room.  Still haven’t gotten a clear answer from anyone as to whether Kindle Fire and Ipads can be monitored and filtered with a program like Safe Eyes or Bsecure.  Won’t be getting one unless we get an answer on that.

HTH

There is always peer pressure, especially if your kids even just occasionally socialize with teenagers outside of your family values and such, but my children’s closest friends are mostly homeschooled, Christian children who are very respectful of what are family has chosen to do about cell phones, facebook, mp3 players, etc. They never bug my kids with “Oh, you should have a cell phone” or whatever. That makes policy-enforcement easier for me.

We have a Wii that was given to my kids last year by their dad, a Nintendo DS given this year to my 11yo daughter (again, from her dad), and also this Christmas, a Kindle Fire to my 14yo daughter (you guessed it–from her dad). The Wii was highly popular at first, so I just set up policies limiting play time, and we actually throw in a “Wii Wednesday” on occasion when we need extra motivation to complete schoolwork & chores (or do extra chores). They can earn Wii time and Wii games with Mom on that day. However, at this point, there are weeks that go by where maybe only one child plays it at all, and maybe only for a short time on one day.

The Nintendo belongs to my creative youngest girl, so she doesn’t spend hours and hours on it. I don’t even ask her to give it to me before bed so she won’t be tempted to play it at night or during the school day–because she never does that. The Kindle is another issue, and if I didn’t limit it greatly, my daughter would be on it constantly. I think that’s what she does on her weekends at her dad’s (where no electronics are limited….arrrgh!) Plus, he has a Wi-Fi connection, so she can surf the internet there as she pleases without anyone really seeing what she’s looking at. So, I take it from her at unexpected times and check the browsing history to see what she’s been viewing and to see what she’s downloading. I also have it registered to my Amazon account, and it sends me an email every time something is “purchased” (even if it is free). She knows this, and she wouldn’t dare order something on my credit card without asking….

Despite my carefulness, I would rather have her receive a Kindle version other than the Fire that does not have a web browser. It’s just putting temptation in her way, especially since the values lived out at her dad’s are very different from mine…..i.e., he has a live-in girlfriend. And he does not mind allowing the kids to watch PG-13 movies of all sorts.

However, one thing he has not yet offered to buy (nor have I encouraged) is a cell phone. I have always told my kids, “You don’t need a cell phone when you are a kid, unless you are old enough to drive and/or have a part-time job.” So, my kids do not expect to have one until they are 15 or older. My 14yo has mentioned it a few times, but rarely. Some of her friends have had them since they were about 12, but they don’t push her to get one. I think you have to know your child and what temptations they might fall prey to regarding this kind of stuff. But I would never put up with 10yo’s texting non-stop or posting pictures of themselves and friends all over facebook.

In my opinion, a Kindle is a valuable tool (if used appropriately) and a cell phone can foster safety for a teen who is driving or at a place of employment (especially at night). All of the other personal music and gaming gadgets are merely entertainment. Sure, it’s fun and refreshing to take a break to play an electronic game or to listen to music while engrossed in a project, but there are many ways to entertain oneself without the gadgets.

Without going into great detail, our kids are unplugged also.  I survived it growing up, so will they.  We will walk them through it as they get older, and as the need arises, which I know it will.

We do have Sony e-readers – no internet connection on these!

https://www.topchoiceelectronics.com/PRS350SC

Well, I guess I look at this a little differently than some other people. My husband grew up loving the newest technology, and his passion for that as a teen developed into him studying to become a computer programmer. He has an excellent job in a field that suits him.

My older son, who is 10, I can already tell is also very good with technology. His mind seems to grasp how it works. He is doing a computer programming course this year at his pace. He and my DH are going to work together this summer to build a computer. (Well, besides that, he does Teaching Textbooks for Math so our computer is a must-have).

He does have a computer in his room that does NOT have internet. He uses it strictly for Microsoft Office (Word, Excel, Powerpoint) and audio books. Occasionally if he has a sleepover he’s allowed to watch a movie in there with his brother and his friend.

My younger son is 6 and he is computer savvy. He learned his states and capitals on Sheppard Software, and he is teaching his sister, who is 4, numbers and letters on the same site.

My DH, being a tech-freak himself, also has some gaming systems. We use those sometimes, but not too often.

I think that technology is a valuable resource for homeschooling families. Our computer has a strong filtering software and is kept in a main room in our house. My sons both use my Kindle for reading from time to time, but I can’t think of any reason that they will need cell phones or tablets for a long time.

In our family, as long as the content is monitored and appropriate, and as long as the time-limits are reasonable and well-enforced, technology is a good thing!

This has been an awesome discussion.  Good point, Doug, about not automatically assuming that anything electronic is mindless.  My husband and I both love technology and are working on learning more about the latest technologies out there.  We have young people in our church that help us fix computers and set up our sound system etc.  Technology and a true knowledge of how it works is so useful in todays world.  We always recommend to parents of computer savvy kids to know as much or more than your child at least about the internet.  Making learning about the computer a family affair can greatly reduce the chance of your children getting involved in the wrong things.  I don’t think most young people get online seeking the wrong things I just believe without guidance it is bound to find them.

One sad story,  My husband and I were in Best Buy looking at Ipads because we are considering purchasing soon.  As we were standing there, a woman walked up and began talking to the sales associate.  She wanted to know which Ipad to get for her 13yr old son.  The associate was trying to get a little info to help with his advice.  The Woman said, “I don’t know how these work.  I don’t know anything about computer stuff this is just what he wants for his Bday.”  In the course of the conversation she also mentioned she was a single mom.  The associate ended up selling her on the newest version 64GB.  We left the store feeling really sad for the boy and his mother.  We wished we could give advice, but of course that wasn’t our place. 

I didn’t read all the above posts but thought I would chime in. If you feel uncomfortable with it then G-d is speaking to you and telling you that there will be a problem. Go with that gut feeling. The times I didn’t go with the gut feeling I regreted it. We do have a computer at home. My kids are not allowed on it unless they are studying Geography and I put it on for them. They do have a computer in their bedroom and I only let them put educational games on. That is the only thing that is suppose to come into our house. If I think they are using it to much I take the power cord away. IF they are not getting their other things done… I take the power cord away…. If they are fighting over who gets to play what… I take the power cord away.  I take it away and don’t give it back until I can see things shape up.. Sometimes that maybe a few weeks. I don’t want them abusing the privilege but to be honest it probably would have been better if they never had it.  However, they have learned quite a bit from some of the games that reinforced what I have been trying to teach them.

         Good Luck with your decision!  Blessings