Tired of negative people

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  • September 10, 2010 at 2:10 am
    Malissa
    Member

    Hi everyone,

    I am just needing to vent. Tonight my 12 y/o son was told that he couldn’t be in the Civil Air Patrol because he “has a history of behavioral outbursts (he is high functioning autistic and unless he is told what to expect, he struggles with his behavior, but that being said, he is doing so much better than he used to).” But, I admit he does struggle with his behavior. But Caleb has been working for years to get control of his attitude and have better respect for adults (an issue we have worked on since he was a toddler). He is doing so much better, but people simply won’t give him a chance. What can I do to get people to give him a chance??? It is so hard at times. Five years ago, for instance, I wouldn’t have even considered taking him on a field trip, but tomorrow we are going on a field trip (with my local CM support group) to the Des Moines Civic Center. How do I battle something like this??? I would really like some advice on this. It just tears me apart when this happens.  Thanks for letting me vent. Talk to you all soon.

    September 10, 2010 at 1:47 pm
    suzukimom
    Participant

    Well, my first question (and I don’t know), is that can he legally be excluded because of a disability?

    September 10, 2010 at 1:58 pm
    quietwatersmommy
    Member

    That was my question too, suzukimom.

    I have an 11 yo son with Aspergers, and anyone who knows about the disorder knows they can’t help the behavior outbursts and that they aren’t doing it to be annoying. 

    I don’t know anything about the Civil Air Patrol, but a call to the directors (maybe by your dh if he is better at handling this kind of thing) to explain what Asperger’s is and that it is illegal to exclude him because of his issue. Let them know that if they could let him know what to expect, he would do just fine with it.

    That said, you may want to also try to use something like l-theanine, which is an amino acid that is found in green tea. It’s very calming. We use to have to use it daily (up to 600 mg/day as per what the naturopath recommended.) , but now we use it only as needed. Usually about 200 mg works. You can get chewables if he can’t swallow pills and he can have them with him if he feels anxiety/an outburst coming on.

    That is great that you are able to take him on field trips now. We have been able to do that too recently, whereas like you said, 5 years we couldn’t.

    You are not alone. Let us know what happens.

     

    Nanci

    September 10, 2010 at 3:36 pm
    Malissa
    Member

    Hi everyone,

    I’ve talked to my husband more and he is going to deal with this one. But to answer the legality question, yes, this is illegal. But I’m not sure how we are going to deal with this. Tonight my dh (Doug) and I are going to have our date night and discuss what to do. We may just let it go. Caleb is involved in Boy Scouts (my husband is one of the leaders) so we may just encourge him to pursue him making Eagle Scout and at that point consider trying CAP again. Plus, Doug is concerned about him taking on to much by doing scouts and CAP both. Not to mention school work. Thank you for letting me vent. At times I feel like this is the only place I can do that . 🙁 But I’m glad I have you all, even if I don’t you most of you personally. 🙂 At least this week has gone well for school work. Plus, right now, I am also writing a devotional to top things off.  But that part is fun actually. 🙂 Talk to you all soon and thanks again. 🙂

    God Bless!!!

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