Taekwondo School is asking for grades

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  • Jodie Apple
    Participant

    I’m not sure how best to address this.  At our son’s last belt test they asked him what his grades in school were and he responded “I don’t know.”  They asked again and he responded ” I really do not know.”  So they have told him they expect him to find out and let them know.  We follow Charlotte’s thoughts on grades and don’t tell our children what grades we turn into our umbrella school.  Any thoughts on how to handle this?  Thanks.

    Sonya Shafer
    Moderator

    It might be helpful to contact the teacher directly — during a neutral time, not when he/she is trying to teach a class — and ask for clarification and explain your situation. You might ask what their purpose is in asking for grades and try to work together to find a way to fulfill that purpose while still respecting your homeschool choices.

    srlord
    Participant

    My son’s Taekwondo school does request grades, as well as a behavior chart to be completed weekly by parents.  According to the instructor, the Taekwondo program seeks to promote discipline across all aspects of the child’s life, physically, scholastically, behaviorally, etc.  Our instructor stated that they want to be able to “address” any home life issues.  We requested not to participate in this aspect of the Taekwondo program and have not done so.  I am okay with the program’s general promotion of good habits, but disagree with any aspect that specifically targets my son’s habits or areas of weakness, as I see that as my job.  My son is especially sensitive to criticism, so I am a bit of a control freak, about what is said to him about any areas that he needs work.  We have worked really hard to get away from the premise that grades are centrally important in school work so I have chosen not to promote grades, either positive or negative.  I really reward on effort and progress that my son has made individually.  I did not delve deeply into the whys with our program instructors just requested that my son not be subject to these “behavioral reviews”.

    If you do decide to give the program your child’s grades, I would monitor the response from the instructors, just to make sure it is handled in a manner that you agree with and that is appropriate for your child. 

    Jodie Apple
    Participant

    Thanks Sonya.  I had thought of doing that but I think the fear of having to “defend my position” has invaded my mind.  Embarassed  (Debate is not a strength of mine.)  They want to know because they like the students to pursue excellence in all areas of their lives, especially school.  We have informed them that his grades are excellent, but they continue to ask him for specifics.

    Jodie Apple
    Participant

    ‘srlord’ :  I just read your response.  Thank you.  Our school does what you’ve described and they point out the students’ home and school weaknesses in front of the whole class AND the entire audience of parents/guardians, etc.  I really have a problem with this but am not sure how to handle it or if  I should even.

    Esby
    Member

    We are a martial arts family and we get the report card request as well. I explained to the instructors that we are a homeschooling family and that since I’m the teacher of my kids, if I’m bringing them to the dojo for martial arts class, I am endorsing that their schoolwork is up to par. Once they saw the situation like that, they stopped asking for report cards.

    Jodie Apple
    Participant

    @Esby, very good point!  Thanks for sharing.

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