Scared and doubting myself!

What a beautiful post, Robin… everything you said here is so true.

Robin and Jenn have being homeschooling for a long time, so I thought I’d offer encouragement from someone who has only been doing this for the last year. I’ve been where you are a time or two in the last year. Someone once told me that if you are going to say “I’ll try it for a year and see how it goes” you end up robbing yourself of much of the joy of homeschooling. Basically you are putting a rediculous amount of pressure on yourself to have the perfect year. I think it’s best to relax and look at the long term goals you have for your children and realize that while you may not have the resources or money or time to do everything in one year, you have lots of time to accomplish those goals. This year you are going to be discovering a lot. You’re going to find out that your family isn’t like the other homeschooling family you know. Their routines are not going to work perfectly for your family, the curriculum they loved and recommended your family may hate. You’re going to find out that some of your expectations were unrealistic, and that your child has different ideas about what he likes or doesn’t like (like I thought we’d do all kinds of lapbooks only to discover my dc hate to cut and paste). You may find the space you had in mind for doing your school work doesn’t work for you after all, or you end up changing your organizing system four times. All this stuff is normal and definately doesn’t mean you’re a failure — it just means you’re learning, too.

Make goals for your children, but also make goals for yourslef and how you’d like to grow over the year. Study your children. Spend time one on one at least once a day. Go for quality time. Bake together, go for walks or bike rides together, read some great lit together, etc. Focus on just the basics for academics starting out whether your child is in K or 7. Figure out what you can let slide for a while(there will be several things that can wait until upper elementary or Jr. high — even formal science, history, foriegn language, etc.)and give yourself permission to relax about those things for now, especially if your children are only in early elementary.

Sorry, I don’t know that you were looking so much for advice as encouragment. I have the same questions. My older son would be going into 6th at the jr high. He’d have all kinds of etra-curricular options and sports. Someone else would teach him math and science and French. But I’ve seen so much growth in him this past year — in acedemics, in maturity, he’s developed a real joy of reading that he never had. All the ‘advantages’ and’opportunities’ of PS are not really worth much when you consider the true opportunities and advantages of raising your own children to be the people GOd created them to be.

(If, like me, you’ve pulled your children from PS, you will need to deschool, and that will take time — about a month per year in PS is usually recommended. This doesn’t necessarily mean do nothing acedemic, but try to focus on your relationship with your child first and formost.)

We are starting our 6th year of homeschooling. Since I took my older 3 children out of ps in 1,2 and 3rd grade, I have been where you are, many many times.  It doesn’t always get easier either. Because anything worth doing is usually not easy. However what I have found is that it gets better…I am better at knowing what they need, we are better at having fun, better at spending time together, better at talking to each other, better at loving each other. We know each other better and I really like my children as people not just as my children. I know how they learn and when they learn something. I never knew these things when they were in school. I got to hear about their learning from a second party, like a teacher. I wasn’t part of the excitement. I didn’t know how to fill in the gaps. 

Homeschooling is a family journey. A family trip down education lane. When those dark thought/doubt come back to my mind. I remember this… that we are in this together. And in the end when these kids are all grown up, what things will matter the most? Will it be some friend they knew when they we 8 but have since forgotten or some school project they did when they were 12 that didn’t teach them any life skills anyways? No I think what will matter most is the relationship they have with their family. Those people that love and care for them unconditionally…and guaranteed that it takes time to build those family bonds. Homeschooling gives us that time.

Happy Homeschooling!

May I suggest to go very slow w/ your 6yr old? He is only six and this is a very important time for him to develop a love for learning! 🙂 Maybe you can start out by reading lots of good literature, listening to some hymns and/or classical music during lunch! As well as getting some living math books to introduce math! Such as Greg Tang’s books, or How Much is a Million?, or the Hershey’s addition and subtraction books!

I would hold off on writing for a couple of wks..and maybe just do some writing in shaving cream? Unless he has already practiced that! Can he read yet? Or are you teaching him this yr? If he needs help, NOT CM!!!, but starfall.com can be a reward when he completes his work for the day w/out complaining or fighting w/ his sibling!

Oh Maybe include some wonderful audio cd’s from Jim Weiss! 🙂

Don’t fret..take it one day at a time..and YOU can do this!!! come back to the forum for encouragement!

I felt the very same way in the beginning (and occasionally now, even after 7 years).

If I had to do it over (and how I wish I could), I would take my 6 yo to the library almost daily, the park, zoo, museums, etc., and maybe find a local home school group. I would read good books to him and *maybe* do some related activities (kind of like Five in a Row to give me a guide) just for fun. I know some kids will balk if you ask them if they want to do “such and such” but instead I just get the items out, put them on the table, and get started….my 6 yo jumps in right away.

It does get easier to “see” where you are going as time passes and you become more experienced and confident. And, I hate to judge, but when you spend time with kids that are educated by the public school system and their penmanship could use some gentle guidance/practice, can barely spell/read, don’t seem to “care” about good literature (or have ever been read any), then you figure out real quick that you are doing a pretty swell job. Now, I realize that not every ps educated child fits that mold, but some that I have spent quite some time with, do. Obviously there are hs children who lack the desire to learn, but they are probably still exposed to the same “basics” and then some.

Give yourself and your ds time. Time to adjust, to find *your* rhythm, your way of doing things. In the meantime, do some fun, fun, fun activities…and read lots of books!!