refusing to do a written narration

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  • October 20, 2014 at 5:11 pm
    stephw2
    Participant

    Please help me ladies. I am at a loss for how to help my son. We are reading a book about the Civil War and today we read about six paragraphs on the first day of the battle of Gettysburg. I asked him to do a written narration. He is refusing to write anything. He says that he doesn’t know what to write. He doesn’t remember. Now this is not his first written narration. He is just having one of those days. What kind of consequence would you dole out for a child in this case. He is 11. He is not incapable of doing this. He just says he is terrible at narration. So he has a bad attitude and refusal to do work. I don’t know what to do. 

    October 20, 2014 at 6:49 pm
    JenniferM
    Participant

    Are you saying you think he trying to see if he can get out of doing what is required of him?

    I recollect reading once about a mother who had a set amount of time for work for her children each day. They could use that time to do their school work, or they could use that time to do work-work (beyond their usual chores). I think she only had to employ this tactic once or twice with each child.

    Another approach is to tell your son he has x amount of time to write his narration (since you said he has proven that he is capable) and after time is up, the notebook closes until dinner time when he can show Dad his work for the day. This would have a huge impact with my children who don’t want to disappoint Dad.

    Those are just two things I thought of. I hope you receive some more answers. Give yourself grace. It’s easy to feel defeated in moments like these.

    October 20, 2014 at 6:50 pm
    JenniferM
    Participant

    Also, remind him you don’t expect perfection, you simply expect him to give HIS best effort. Encouraging words go a long way.

    October 20, 2014 at 7:10 pm
    Monica
    Participant

    My son would refuse to do written narrations when he felt overwhelmed – not knowing exactly how to start.  Some kids, I think, need more direction when it comes to narrations.  Can you have him tell it to you orally and then type it out for him?  Can you read the paragraphs individually and then have him narrate each one?  Would he be interested, instead, in writing as a journalist reporting the news from the first day of the battle?  Can you sit with him and have him do a quick outline of each paragraph to get him started?  Would he spend time reenacting the first day of the battle with Legos?

    I used to get frustrated with my oldest when he refused to write, but as he’s gotten older I now realize that he needs more specific direction to help him get started and organize his thoughts.

    October 20, 2014 at 8:00 pm
    retrofam
    Participant

    I agree with jawgee, the last post. Most of the time as parents we see the child as capable because we’ve seen them do it before. What we fail to realize is that many times they aren’t capable consistently without help and/ or encouragement. I have made this mistake many times.

    Giving him ideas or writing part of it with him should help.

    I have several boys who are reluctant writers, so I feel your pain and frustration.

    October 21, 2014 at 1:04 pm
    stephw2
    Participant

    I’m torn between him being capable and struggling. He admitted that he wasn’t listening when I read, but I also know that he can freeze at times with narration. I will take to heart every bit of wisdom shared here. A bit more encouragement from me goes a long way. Thank you all for sharing.

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