Has anyone thought or discussed potty training as a habit? I am about to start potty training with my 2 1/2 year old son, and just thought that thinking of it as a habit, might be good. My two older ones were potty trained after 3, and it was a piece of cake since they were so old. However, I’m tired of spending money on diapers and wipes and I’m certain he’s capable of it.
I’m not quite sure what you mean as viewing potty training as habit training. If you mean what I think you mean, then you would consider your child capable of developing this habit and hold them responsible if they didn’t. Would that also mean that there would be consequences ie. discipline if they had an accident?
If that is what you mean….. then I had friends who tried that approach. They were very eager to get their two yo trained before the next baby arrived. I wanted to tell them that I didn’t think it would work very well, but they’re pretty opinionated (apparently so am I ) so I didn’t say anything. It didn’t work well. There may be a few children in the world who would do well with that approach, but none of them resided in my home. I’ve potty trained ten, and have certainly made many mistakes along the way. It finally dawned on me that children will pretty much train themselves when they are ready and the best approach is encouragement only. I wish I had learned that earlier, but it took me until child #8!
I think I’m inclined to agree with Jean on this one… I’ve only trained six (encouraging the seventh), so she likely has more wisdom than I can offer. But I can say it has also been true in our home that they will pretty much train themselves when ready, with encouragement. For ours, some have been fully trained before two years of age, some not until after three.
We use cloth diaper and trainers, so the cost isn’t much of an issue. I think we’ve had two in diapers since 1999…..
No, I wasn’t thinking of discipline for accidents. I’ve done fine with my other two, I was just wondering if this topic had been touched on in here. CM had a wonderful way of thinking if habits and of gently teaching new ones. I didn’t know if there had been discussion of using any of those philosophies in the area of potty training. I’m guessing not, though!
The only time I think I would consider discipling with potty trainging is if the child were pretty old, and I was certain he/she was using it as a way of being defiant….but I’d have to be sure of it!
When my child is well aware that what he *(only boys till now) of what they were doing and me and dh know it’s been a defiance issue we used a idea given to us by a mom of many. We need to “wash” away the pee because you made an accident. When we washed it was with cold water, just turn it on, rinse, wash and rinse again. I think we had to do it maybe 5 times with a really defiant one but that’s it. He knew he had to go and just didn’t want to so we made going in his pants very unpleasent. (It was summer with this one and he didn’t want to come in, hmmm but the silly thing is we have 10 acres and the boys are allowed to drop there pants and pee at a tree so I don’t know why he did this LOL)
We’ve potty trained six children. Six different stories.
I just waited with Benjamin (2.75 yrs), and he pretty much took the diaper off 2 weeks ago, and has never put it back on, and we’re already out of the pull-ups at nap/bedtime. (We had some accidents on Day 1, fewer on Day 2…and that was that. Amazing. I won’t be pushing Judah either (Baby SeVen).
*I had both of them in diapers for 15 months, and we’ve had a few other children overlap…I feel your pain. Have you considered cloth diapers or atleast cloth wipes?
I’ve done cloth in the past, and sadly I somehow LOST all my cloth diapers when I put them in our garage to store them. So sad. 🙂 I know he knows what’s going on in his little body. Hoping it’s a smooth transistion! I read the book Toilet Training in Less Than a Day by Nathan H. Azrin Ph.D. My other two were a breeze to potty train, so maybe that book is right.
My almost 3 yo has recently been telling me that she is peeing or pooping…. (For background, she was eager to potty train about 10 months ago, when I had a newborn at home… and got to be an expert at sitting on the toilet, etc… just not the actual “going”)
so yesterday we started training (again)… yesterday she stayed dry/clean the whole day (except naptime) and today she has only had one accident (and ran to the toilet… got her training pants wet but not the floor, etc…)
I’m thinking that if things keep going this good, we are buying pretty underwear this weekend!
Had to share with people who would appreciate it! 3 (almost) done…. 1 more (so far) to go!
Congratulations! Good for her, and good for you for being tuned in enough that you didn’t push her too early, but recognized the moment and seized it when it came!!
Just gotta say “YAY!” My 3 yo is almost there – we are in undies all the time, but still a couple accidents with #2. But hey, NO DIAPERS!!!!! Love it. I’m very happy for you :).
thank you all so much for these ideas, and I too was looking to CM for help with potty training. So I wanted to add another question to this feed – I have a 5 year old son who was fully potty trained and was doing well up until last year, 1 year after I had our baby girl. I got him trained in 3 days using a reward system before our baby was born, he was pottying well until he turned 4.
Then something switched and he started messing and wetting himself. Then we would encourage him and it would stop and then he would start again, but he has not messed himself in a while only wet.
I spoke to him and explained that this is inappropriate and unacceptable and we needed to find a solution, his response to me was “I only do it at home.’ Which funny enough is true. He is very on point when we go out and remembers when he needs to utilize the facilities, and rarely if ever has accidents.
Our baby girl who is now 2 is pretty much potty training herself and I am guiding her, she makes it to the potty to make her BM and occasionally gets there in time to pee. She is dealing with the the whole process very well and getting the hang of things.
A bit of history:
They were both early developers, sitting, crawling, walking, talking. I took advantage of their early development to start their training process gently. So from they start sitting up I introduced them to the potty, washing hands and what we call our POTTY STEPS -pee/poo, clean, flush, wash, turn lights off and close door.
When I was pregnant my mother came to help out, because of complications. I asked her not to potty train my son, because I wanted to do it, however she got tired of changing his diapers (2 going on 3 years) and went against my wishes and was training him by forcing him to stay on the toilet for up to 2 hours and longer if he did not do anything in the potty – all while screaming in tears. In my state of pain I had to put an end to it by devising a reward system plan that got him trained in 3 days. And it worked fine until after he turned 4 when he started doing what I mentioned above.
If anyone has any suggestions of how to help him through this I need all the help I can get. For I think my mother scarred him with using the bathrooms at home as he is more comfortable using the public facilities.
Benita
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