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Paring down the toy pile
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Hi,
I have 8 children and very generous grandparents. My question is, what is ‘enough’? That may sound odd, but, if you were to get rid of most of your children’s toys, what would you keep and how much?
Thanks,
Cindy
I read a great article on this last fall and it helped with the “culling” of our bedrooms as well as deciding what to purchase for Christmas. It is a “Parents Review” article found on the Ambleside Online website. (The Parents Review is a magazine that was sent to parents and teachers of Charlotte Mason’s schools and correspondence-type homeschools between about 1890 and 1920). We are not permitted to link to it from here, but you can access it from the AO site. Look for an article entitled “Our Children’s Play: Their Toys and Books”.
In a nutshell, it encouraged looking for toys that had no end. Toys that encouraged the use of their imagination and could be used over and over in many ways. Dolls, lego’s, trucks, clay, etc. Here is the exact quotation:
“In choosing toys for the children, how important it is to bear certain points in mind; one special thing to consider is, to give when possible something out of which the child can make other things, or can do something more with.”
This next comment also jumped out at me and I must confess has proven absolutely true with my DD’s.
“it is also said that the continually increasing wealth and perfection of toys also serve to produce dullness in children, or else destructiveness as the only form of activity left to them in relation to these too-perfect toys. In contrast to these perfect toys is the wealth of love and of imagination bestowed on the most meager and unpromising objects, idealised by the child into a doll, a horse or dog, etc., and especially is this the case with the curious objects made to do duty as a doll; and far more real love is lavished on these than on the pink and white fashionable perfections bought from a shop. The less individuality a doll has, the better able is the child to idealise it, and it affords far more scope to its imaginative faculties, as being able to represent many various characters.”
My DD’s have positively life-like baby dolls, but seldom touch them. They prefer the faceless rag dolls…go figure.
The article is excellent if you have time to look it up. I kept the philosophy in mind while shopping this last holiday season and gave the grandparents lists of what I would like them purchase instead of allowing them to buy out the store. This year, the gifts are ALL still being enjoyed, have provided hours of fun for the family and were even used quite a bit in schooling.
So my suggestion is to sort with an eye to the imagination…does it serve only one purpose? Does it promote creative thinking and engagement of the mind?
Perhaps that will help a little…Tonni
Great principles, Tonni! Thanks for pointing us to that Parents Review article. (Moderator’s note: Ambleside Online has a policy that no one may link to their site without permission, and then only to the home page. So we are striving to respect their wishes by not linking to them.)
One guideline that my husband and I have followed over the years is to give the children “raw materials.” By that phrase we mean items that can be used in any number of ways. For example, instead of giving the child a beaded necklace kit, we would give her some beads and some fishline. With those raw materials and minimal instructions, she could create whatever she wanted, not just the items outlined in the kit. Here’s an article I wrote on the subject. Another simple example is using blank sheets of paper with crayons or paints rather than coloring books. Blank sheets leave much more scope for imagination. 🙂
Strategy games are another favorite. If you look at the games that are available, some are based on strategy (chess, mancala, tic tac toe) and some are based on chance (for example, games in which the dice or the spinner determines where you land). The more strategy-based games you can provide, the more opportunities for the children to do logical thinking in a fun setting. Of course, some chance-based games are great too, but it was eye-opening when we discovered those two different approaches to games.
Thank you for that last bit of advice Sonya. My 10 yodd needs to spend more time with logical thinking activities. I have hesitated to pick up workbooks that are supposed to “teach” logical thinking since I would prefer to limit “artificial experiences”. Mancala is a wonderful (and not very expensive) option. I will be more mindful in looking at games and activities from this point forward! I often read your posts and wish you lived next door to me…you wouldn’t get much done though, I’d be knocking on your back door everyday! LOL!!
The Parents Review discussion is eye-opening too. When we were at Wal-Mart the other day I noticed my 6yo ds playing with a couple of wooden superhero-type “people”. He was having a wonderul time with them. When he played with the Speed Racer car he pushed all the buttons, listened to it, then just stared at it. That only lasted a few minutes (at a cost of nearly $40). Next time I go back I will pick up the wooden people and also some wooden building blocks and I know he will have literally hours of fun with those at half the cost!
I am grateful to all the women who are willing to share their experiences and ask questions, it’s so enlightening!
BTW the AO article referred to above is in Volume 17 on the AO site. There is a lot to look through!
Thanks for all the good advice; I will read it all again and take a look at the recommended articles. Now, could we get very specific? How much do you allow your children to keep? We really don’t have a lot of ‘single use’ toys (though I have a couple in mind that will be going out of the house today!). But how many dolls, trucks/cars, horses, block sets (of various kinds – wooden, duplo, Lincoln Logs, gears…)?
I know this is comparing myself to others in the extreme, but I know that I’ve pick up some muddled thinking in this area right now – maybe it’s age…
Blessings,
Cindy
That’s a great question, Cindy. IMHO, it depends on how those toys can serve you (the Mom) best. If sibling conflict is an issue, you may want to keep enough for several children to each have their own. (Of course, we want to deal with the conflict resolution, but peace of mind must also be a practical consideration in the process. 🙂 )
If clutter is an issue, you may want to pare down to just as many as the children can clean up easily. What that magic number is, probably only you and they will know.
If space is an issue, you may want to purge to just one container of each genre. Hey, maybe it would help to select a container the right size to fit in the storage space (shelf or whatever) and then keep only enough to fit inside that container? You could have one container of dolls, one of Legos, one of horses, one of cars, etc.
Just some random thoughts to try to help us all think through this practical question.
I would add one thing to Sonya’s comment. If space is not an issue, you can never have enough Legos and other building-type toys. We have found that the more Legos you have the more creative the kids can be with their building. Building-type toys are also good creative toys for all ages. Even my husband would love to have time to play with the boys’ Lego robot kits. 🙂
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