Overwhelmed by babysitting requests

What about “scheduling” family time for pools and parks and such.  Then when they ask you can say, sorry, we have plans/prior commitments this week.  It’s not being dishonest, just protecting your own family time as a family.

I can empathize. I had a similar problem when I first started homeschooling. I will share with you what I wish someone had shared with me in those days.

It’s okay to say no. You don’t need to feel guilty for saying no. A yes to one thing is always a no to something else. When you say yes to these babysitting requests, you are saying many no’s to all the other things you may have done that day. Your first responsibility is to your husband and children and to being the best wife and mother you can be. You should be enjoying these days and making memories with your little ones. If babysitting is causing more stress for you, you can be sure your family is feeling the results as well.

God hasn’t called us to say yes to everyone. 🙂 He’s called us to make wise choices and prioritize-not to allow others to take advantage of us.

When my kids were younger I’d get more requests to babysit, go to the women’s parties, etc. and since I tend to have a guilty conscience would have trouble saying no.

I’m thankful for my hubby…he’d see me getting stressed or resenting doing things, which can harm our family time. At times we have adopted a policy that I simply can’t do things during certain seasons, or need to check with him first. He has absolutely no problem being the bad guy…then I don’t feel guilty:)

I am always willing to help a friend who has a true need due to health, etc  issues. But if it’s for constant choice issues….the parents need to be responsible for their own kids and simply say no to non-essentials if they can’t arrange care.

I have a friend whose neighbor/friend would regularly interrupt her school day to watch her kids while she got her hair done, etc.  We should have servants hearts, but pray for wisdom to not be taken advantage of!

These are all wonderful responses!  Especially Melanie’s.  Here, here!  YES, a “yes” to one thing is a “no” to another–while you are watching others’ kids, something else is not getting done.  Your husband and children have to some first!  Of course there are emergencies, but at those times, the need justifies your inconvenience. One other idea I wanted to throw out there–when people ask, you might treat it as a request for a babysitting trade.  I have had to do that gently sometimes with a friend who frequently asks.  I’ll cheerfully say “Oh!  Sure, you want to do a swap?  When would be a good time to take mine?  Maybe ___?”  Said with the right heart attitude (a willingness to help and share burdens, but also be fair), I think this can be a good approach.  Sometimes people are so wrapped up in their own needs that they just don’t think about others’ needs.  It may not be intentional selfishness so much as obliviousness.  A gentle reminder can create an opportunity for them to either reciprocate the favor, or reconsider their request.  (If it is helpful for you, you could also ask for a different favor–“Sure, I’ll take the kids for a couple hours, if you provide dinner for us, it’ll be hard for me to get dinner made with extra children underfoot!”, etc.)