Notes from Sonya's new talk "When More Is Less…"

The talk is actually entitled: “When More Is Less: A Call to Simplicity in Your Schedule, Your Home, and Your Children’s Education.”

With all the discussion and interest related to Sonya’s new “More is Less…” talk, I thought I’d share some of my notes. I felt a little weird doing this, but checked with the SCM team and Doug assures me that it’s fine to do this and get/keep the discussion going.  Some things are probably more directly what Sonya said, while others may be impressions I had based on what she saying — of course, I can’t make the distinction at this point which is which, but perhaps something will prove helpful. 

• Sonya began with a great analogy and visual that I can’t do justice at the moment, but the point that I took away from it is this: The stuff we add to our lives is often intended to be good, but sometimes it really just adds misery and drudgery, and keeps us from appreciating the beauty and blessings that are all around us because just feel overwhelemed and burdened. (Edit: My quick feeble attempt to explin the analogy: A man going preparing for a 6 month trip backpacking trip and has just what he needs, whereas his friend had the exact same backpack of supplies/essentials, yet showed up for the trek all of these ridiculous extras — a big fluffy pillow, a paper shopping bag filled with who-knows-what, and just tons of extras stuffed under his arms, hanging off him, etc. That guy started the journey but quickly ended up muttering then outright complaining about everything, whereas the guy travelling wiht the essentials was enjoying the fresh mountain air, the feel of the trail beneath his feet, just living in the moment and appreciating it.)
• The 3 main focus areas addressed, where we might be overloaded: our schedules, our homes, our children’s education.

OUR SCHEDULES: We want to LIVE WELL

• Be available to minister in the moment
• We can’t be handcuffed to a clock — needs happen at inopportune moments (needs of a child, a neighbor, a friend, etc)
• Look over the last 2 weeks: do you feel you have lived in a flurry of activity or have relationships been nurtured?
• Identify non-essentials: how will this activity help this child grow into a Godly adult? how does it affect the rest of the family? Is this activity really helping achieve the goals I had in mind when I agreed to it, the goals I hoped it would? 
• Prepare yourself for the challenges that come with changing your schedule and your outside commitments: a key phrase to use — “right now” (as in when saying “no” to someone: “No, this is not a good fit for us right now”). Keep in mind the big picture of what is best for yoru family/
• Prepare your children for the coming changes — a beautiful example given where a mom explained in the spring that their family would only have one day for outside activites once the fall came, so explained the situation to the son (who had a favorite commitment that would be in conflict with this) suggesting that over the summer he think about what things he would like to learn about, what new interests, etc. he might now have time for with this new freedom he would have. A few months into the changed scheduled, the son came back and thanked his mom for making those changes, expressing how much he had enjoyed all of these great things he had time for now that they weren’t so busy.

OUR HOMES: We want to LOVE WELL

• So much time is is spent on *things* — cleaning, replacing, moving, buying things — this hinders our ability to love well.
• Are my things helping or getting in the way of loving people well?
• When decluttering, instead of thinking of “getting rid of” something, things in terms of “putting this back into circulation” for God to use in His kingdom.
• Focus on things within your jurisdiction (not your spouse’s stuff!)
• We will have more freedom to love well if there is less stuff in our home.

OUR CHILDREN’S EDUCTION: We want them to LEARN WELL

• Focus in things that will shape their lives and keep them loving learning.
• Reflect on these questions for each child: How much does s/he care about learning? What kind of person is s/he becoming? (Not asking how much do they know?)
• Give them time to digest  (analogy of savoring one delicious slice of pie versus the experience of a pie-eating contest) — this is not a sprint, but a lifelong process.
• Question additions you plan to add to their education: Do we need it? Do we need it now? Why? Is this curriculum (etc) a good fit for this season of life? Is there another way I can accomplish this? Am I doing this because it’s best for this child, or is it best for me?

FINAL THOUGHTS

• What’s in my backpack? 
• What would my home look like if it was arranged so that I could love well?
• My schedule so that I could live well?
• My children’s education so that they could learn well?
• Examine each item in my backpack!