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Not getting anything done…
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It just seems like we aren’t getting anything done most days.
Today we did a devotion (scripture mastery, an old testament story) – about 15-20 minutes (I didn’t time this)
then we did math (30 min to the timer… 10 minutes of that was a math game)
then we did 5 minutes of copywork.
then I did reading instruction with my younger child, while the 2 older read from an easy book, then narrated. the older 2 had a short break (about 5 minutes) – total 15 minutes
I then tried to do history – we were to read some from Pyramid, then they were going to draw a picture and give me a sentence to go with it…. and I couldn’t get them concentrating or anything and I ended up losing it.
My kids should be able to do more than an hour of school, expecially the 3rd grader. They did about 2.5 hours a day last year…. this year I can’t seem to get them going at all.
All we seem to be getting done is math and reading.
so I had them sitting in a timeout while I made lunch (I was too mad to have them help). I even said “maybe I should just take you guys to school tomorrow.”
My dh had suggested I wake him up after lunch and we could maybe go to the Y or do something fun as a family – and right now I don’t like that idea… the kids getting to do something fun/special on a day when they didn’t do school. But I’m also so upset right now that I couldn’t even try to do more school. I am so tired of fighting with them.
You are not alone. I don’t know if it’s the weather here in MN it’s actually really nice! You know usually by now it’s getting cool and not as fun or easy to get outside. I don’t know if it’s me, but I feel like I am behind on everything. I can’t catch up at all.
You are not alone. To me I’d say get the important things done right away (as it looks like you are) math, bible, and some type of reading. Try adding to it each day.
“Having many kids not just one is a battle some days on it’s own”. That’s my saying :0)
I have also had days were I want to ship them off somewhere anywhere but I know here is where that’s suppose to be. So take a deep breath enjoy a nice long bath and maybe dh can take the kids so you can regroup and relax.
Sorry it’s nothing exciting just wanted you to know you’re not alone and maybe just a little break even 15 minutes will help put things in a better way for the day. HUGS Misty
I’m new to homeschooling, but one thing that tends to keep my kids focused is a schedule of the day. I simply created an Excel spreadsheet with the list of subjects we will be covering each day, printed and laminated it. My almost-6YO uses it every morning and works down the list in order. My older son, who is almost 10YO, uses it as a guideline and uses a dry erase marker to make notes on it for himself to remember.
Now, that said, it’s not a straight shot from the start of “school” to the end of the school day. There are times when they are wrestling on the floor, being silly, getting a snack, etc. The schedule does help them visualize and prepare for the day, to know what I expect, and to have a goal in mind.
Hope that helps some.
It should be to where they dont pay ATTENTION to their school work they have to do it DURING their free time. They need to learn the HABIT of attention. Tell them that if they really focus on school in the MORNING then they can have free time in the afternoon, if not then its school ALL DAY.
I think maybe they are thinking that if they goof off in the morning they wont have to do it at all that day and they think they can push you around but you need to set things straight with them. They are in 3rd grade they should understand that. I have a 4 1/2 year old and we are doing kindergarten and I tell her that if she pays attention in the morning and finishes all her school work she have have the rest of the day outside to play….and she does it.
One thing that comes to mind is what outside things are distracting them? Are the hungry? Tired? Sick or dealing with allergies? Sometimes we don’t recognize the distractions- is the house noisy from little ones? That can make it hard to focus on listening. Have they gotten into a screen time habit? Lots of screen time promotes a tiny attention spam(watch a show and see how long it goes before changing to a different viewing angle – yikes! Another thing that comes to mind is how is each child’s nutrition? Are they deficient in any vitamins, in sunlight, or in lots of time being active?
Hope those giveyou some other possibilities to consider!
Habits, habits, habits! Do they know what is expected of them each day? If they know that they can make you mad and then get out of working then they will continue to do that. Habits and attitude or atmosphere are two things that Charlotte Mason really stressed as important in education. I highly suggest that you look at some of the resources on this website that emphasis this such as Laying down the Rails.
I just finished reading the “Habit is Ten Natures” section of Volume 1, Home Education, in preparation for leading a discussion of this tonight. It really is true, habits are being formed in our children, but we have responsibility to help them form right habits.
Maybe it would be a good time for you and the kids to take a week off from “school.” Give yourself permission to not do any lessons for a week – go on a couple of field trips, spend some time planning or rearranging school things, working on a personal project or hobby. Start back in a week with a new routine. Think of it as a refresher. Take a mom and kids spa day and do yoga, burn scented candles, listen to relaxing music, eat delicious food. Take a few days to do crafts and call it camp. Something to break the cycle of unhappiness/frustration.
Or take some time to do some elaborate “school” project – put together a model, make a diorama, paint a mural, whatever, but give it your full attention, don’t do other lessons while you work on it, and have it be a time of togetherness and common purpose.
I guess what I am getting at is this: when I find myself getting really angry at the kids, it helps us to put aside the activities that are not reinforcing our bond, and instead focus on things that are bringing us together – connectedness. I try to do it until we feel happy together again – including me. I am usually the last one to get back into the fold – my kids are much more forgiving to me than I am to them, they are such a constant example of unconditional love, I strive to be like them. And you can practice habits like obedience and attention while you are working on fun craft projects or sewing or painting or whatever, if you think those things need work. You don’t have to be tortured by unhappy lessons to learn how to behave/get others to behave. I always hope that habits learned in happy times will still be there in difficult times.
{{{hugs}}} this too shall pass – and getting back to a happy contented state may be more important for your family right now than math lessons, so don’t worry – math is something you can catch up on.
I could be wrong, but it looks to me like they had 70 minutes of quit, table time, mental concentration type subjects in a row before you started history. I don’t know about you, but after working the same brain muscle and sitting still while I do it, I am ready for a break too. Do you do hymn study? I would throw some singing in there. What about a walk around the block after math, or a snack? We always start the day with stretching and jumping jacks but you could throw that inbetween stuff too. What about a half an hour break before you started history? They could play what they wanted to, relax their brains, get the wiggles out, jump on the tramp, roll with the dog, whatever. My immediate impression was too much of the same thing for too many minutes in a row. Even in school kids get recess or snack time between subjects. I would definately not reward unfinished work with a pool trip but having fun during the day while learning is important so maybe some variety would help you all. Prayers and hugs, days like that are tough.
I have a 4 1/2 year old and we are doing kindergarten and I tell her that if she pays attention in the morning and finishes all her school work she have have the rest of the day outside to play….and she does it.
This made me snicker and I know that it was meant in all seriousness. But SuzukiMom, I can relate too with your feelings as of late. Today went much better and yesterday too, but last week I was where you are for sure.
I quoted the above to say that my 5YO and 6YO are just like the 4 1/2 YO above. It is my 13YO and 9YO who give me more of the attitude problems, so I just wanted to point out that age may have more to do with it than we think. Just b/c they are in the habit at 4 or 5 or 6, this does not mean they won’t test us in this at a later age. Mine sure have at one time or another. It is not everyday (well for one it is almost), but they do sometimes need a reminder that schoolwork is not optional and the fun stuff is.
I agree with another poster that maybe you need a break in there somewhere, which could be a walk around the block or riding the bike or something. I have even found that my kids will listen afresh if they are lying on their backs looking at the sky outside or in the treehouse sharing a snack or even swinging while I read aloud. Sometimes just a change of scenery helps all of our attitudes–even mine.
Having the same problem here. However, I have been having them help me outdoors. We have been preparing for winter. We have been canning too. I don’t have the energy for everything so I have been taking it one day at a time. So don’t beat yourself up over it. I am trying not to. I also have been doing a little of Sue Patricks Workbox system. That has helped me get a better mental outlook. It is working a little better for me anyway. Just google workboxes. It is worth looking up all the good info. It will give you many ideas. It is great. God Bless and good luck!
Oh, I feel for you, it can be such a balancing act, juggling the times of independent instruction, figuring out when to schedule things, and building good habits. I second the suggestion to check out Laying Down the Rails on this site – it’s an excellent book and has given me lots to think about as I work on the kids’ habits – and my own! I blogged a bit about both habits and the book, here:
http://undertheevergreens.blogspot.com/2011/08/habit-good-servant-and-bad-master.html
We’ve had to work on our schedule here, work with the different personalities, and I’ve had to focus on my own habits of attention to keep the kids moving in the direction I want them to. Take it slowly as you work on this – get the basics down with attention and no dawdling, and then add in the extras. The habits are truly the most important thing at first, because without them, as you’re seeing, you won’t be able to get much done. Someone once told me to choose one habit at a time per child to focus on, and that advice has served me well and kept me from becoming too overwhelmed by all I’d like to change or fix.
I also agree with others who suggested that you alternate seatwork with listening or wiggling activities. Don’t worry, it will come together!
Blessings,
– Aimee
Sorry that things aren’t going well in your home. =( I will agree with the others that habit training and maybe taking a different approach to scheduling may help. But, I also wanted to throw out there the thought that if you can, take some time out for you. Is there someone who can watch the kids for a few hours while you take some time to get away to think and pray over the situation – what steps you may need to take, what heart attitudes need to change, etc. and also just to refresh yourself? Some “mother culture” if you will. I was in a funk myself a couple of weeks ago, and others here posted some wonderful ideas for helping to get out of a rut when you feel stuck and don’t particularly like how things are going…here is a link to the thread with those ideas if you need something to give yourself a kick-start. http://simplycharlottemason.com/scmforum/topic/what-do-you-do-when-you-just-dont-feel-motivated-to-do-anything
Hugs to you!
Jen
Just occured to me that there were a few articles that I read recently that were both encouraging and challenging…perhaps some food for thought as you consider how to proceed in your situation. Blessings and prayers for your family!
http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/motherhood-is-application
http://raisinghomemakers.com/2011/quiet-spaces/
http://www.preschoolersandpeace.com/pandpblog/2011/9/26/abundant-grace-and-teaching-moments.html
Jen
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