We don’t summarize and I don’t ask for the most important part, unless I’m asking what the most important/interesting/strangest part was to them. I will admit that there are times when my arrogance gets in the way and I’m hoping they find important the same thing I found important, that’s a no, no. But, strangely enough, if I wait long enough, they will share what was interesting to them and discuss it in great detail. That is sooo cool!!
Usually it is not at all what I expected, it’s better! But, that takes patience on my part, and a willingness to let their minds work for those nuggets, and then be okay with whatever conclusion they came to. Now I do expect narrations (in a variety of ways) and they are all aware of that, we have them scheduled in OR I may just randomly ask about something they are reading about, etc. And at times I may skim over a passage and ask about a certain character/event, but I ask for what they remember (like I’m really curious as to what they think, cause I am), but not to catch them slipping, LOL. And, if I am reading, I do not read the passage more than once or let them refer to their books to refresh their memory.
I do have an expectation of myself and that is patience. I have a talk w/ myself beforehand to remind myself to not interrupt, ant that we may not to come to the exact same conclusions but just have a genuine discussion. I also say to myself as they are narrating (as I’m listening), “Wait for it, wait for it, wait for it.” It reminds me to slow down and wait for the wheels to turn and their minds to work on what they are going to narrate or are narrating. That’s all on me, not them. My oldest ds may come to the end of narration and remember something he thought was important but didn’t quite fit into what he had already shared. I try to give him time at the end knowing that he will probably say, “Oh, one more thing…” Then we discuss.
Hopefully I’m doing this right, as it seems to be working and my kids do not seem bogged down with the whole thing, but genuinely wanting to share what they feel they know. My goal is for them to realize that their ideas, thoughts, conclusions are important and worthy to be shared, not critiqued…been there, done that. Not a good feeling to have your thoughts said to have not been good enough or that the “answer” was not right.
My .02…sorry to ramble.