Masterly Inactivity

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  • June 4, 2024 at 4:46 pm
    Jandyra Maciel
    Participant

    Hi everyone, this is my first time posting so I’m a little nervous!

    Something I am really working to grasp is the skill of ‘Masterly Inactivity’. I had a mother who was over-involved and I remember feeling suffocated and eternally frustrated. I find that when I am busy/overloaded/anxious I am exactly the same way. I become a perfectionist and try to control every aspect of my daily life, and that includes micromanaging my 12 year old daughter which, as you can imagine, results in escalation and damaged peace.

    Does anyone have any advice, or just plain encouragement to know that I’m not alone in this struggle!

    Peace

    June 9, 2024 at 7:02 am
    Ruralmama
    Participant

    I don’t struggle with over-managing (I have 6 kids though). I do struggle with getting crabby and unreasonable when stressed… particularly if the house is really messy.

    The only things that help me are prayer and always keeping my ideal mother in front of me…like the vision center f how/who I want to be. The other thing that helps are consistent expectations and chores so our schedule and jobs are not just at my whim.

    June 9, 2024 at 4:51 pm
    MelissaB
    Participant

    I posted a message to you yesterday (Saturday), but I think it’s stuck in the SCM spam filter.  I emailed support so hopefully it will post when the weekend is over.

    Melissa

    June 10, 2024 at 12:06 pm
    MelissaB
    Participant

    Welcome to the board!  I am actually “retired” now (my last one graduated last June – so sad as it goes by entirely too fast), but noticed no one had replied.  This board isn’t as active as it used to be – likely because of social media.  I think the people that are on here prefer the slower pace of the message board and also don’t check in as often, so I hope that didn’t discourage you.

    Have you downloaded the free SCM resource on this topic – https://simplycharlottemason.com/store/masterly-inactivity/

    My encouragement to you would to be to try bits at a time – 30 minutes of letting go.  New habits are hard to develop sometimes, so give yourself grace when you’re working to change something.  Maybe reading the Laying Down the Rails for Yourself book (I haven’t read this resource, but I’ve never used a SCM resource I didn’t love).

    I hope this helps you somewhat and maybe others will chime in with some good suggestions.  Remember we are working to make lifelong learners (ourselves included).

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