I’m not sure I have any answers to your question but I can tell you about our situation.
We live 24hrs from my family and I am the oldest with the oldest grandchildren. My mother dreams of the day that we will move closer but as our 9 children get older that is becoming less and less likely. Our oldest is now married and has made the visit once to my family since he got married a year ago.
When our children were younger we made the trip approximately twice a year and my parents once a year. Since then the frequency varies. We moved and began a small hobby farm and my husband runs his own business so it has gotten harder and harder to get away. My parents are farmers so it is difficult for them to get away but they make every effort to make it happen. Between our trips and theirs we have gone two years without seeing them. This is very difficult for my mom and it is hard to get her to understand that this is where God wants us. I do speak to her every few weeks on the phone but I am bad for sending pictures and the like. She does have my sisters and their families close by.
As my children grew older in order to see more places we would go out of our way a few hours or more to visit National Parks and other scenic areas and then we would cut our visit a little shorter visiting family. This was not always so well received but we needed to do it for our family and my mother came to realize that if she wanted to see us it was best to enjoy every moment she could get and to be thankful for it. We tacked on visits to Theodore National Park, Glacier Park, the Black Hills and many other places. I should note that we have not exhausted places of interest to visit while visiting my family.
It is becoming more and more difficult to travel as a family with my older children working, some of them with my husband. My husband’s work is seasonal so the best time for trips is in the winter but that limits us as we head west. We do winter sports but it’s not the same as summertime.
This past summer I made the trip with the younger children and an older child to help with the driving. My sisters went camping with their children and my boys joined them and I stayed with my parents and visited the campers daily with my younger three. We did sightseeing and hiking that my children had never done before. We had so much fun.
Oh, and we rarely make it specifically for special events. Two years ago we visited my family over New Years because that was the only time my son’s fiancee had time off from college. That was three weeks before my parents 40th wedding anniversary but they were so glad to see us it really didn’t matter.
I guess I gave you more than what you were looking for but wanted to say that I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all and I think your family will really enjoy seeing new places.