I am new to CM and have decided after some deliberation to start working on habits, one new one per month. Obedience, I know is a logical first habit, but we have reasons to need to start with something that at least sunds more egalitarian.
My older child, age 9, left school under very bad circumstances, in which very severe bullying was ignored by teachers and a blame the victim mentality persisted. He was hospitalized for depression (with my consent, but against my better judgement) and there was not protected adequately from other violent children, one of whome threw him against a wall so hard he got a concussion. I will not soon forgive myself for my failing to protect him soon enough, but I am glad I finally figured out that I had the power and the courage to remove him from the situation. As an aside, I recently spoke to the mother of one of his classmates that her own child (again, we are talking third graders here) attempted suicide as a result of the same bullying situation. He too is now out of school, but I fear for the other children who remain in that school.
Anyway, as a result, my dear child no longer trusts adults have his best interests at heart and resists adult power plays that are too openly stated. He is getting better, but I suspect that broaching the topic of obedience in too heavy handed a manner will cause him to revolt. So, I’ve decided to start with listening as our first habit, and to bring in obedience to legitimate authority in a few months when we can really discuss the difference between legitimate and illegitimate authority figures.
After all, you can’t obey if you don’t even listen, and listening is a habit we can all work on together.
That said, I’d like some good stories, games, and other ideas for creatively incorporating the theme of listening into this month.
