Name: Thrive! NCHE Homeschool Conference
Start: 2025-05-22T00:00:00-05:00
End: 2025-05-24T23:59:59-05:00
Location: Winston-Salem, NC

Tagged: learning swim

This topic has 11 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 5 months ago by LindseyD.

Viewing 12 posts - 1 through 12 (of 12 total)

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December 4, 2012 at 3:02 am
Jennifer
Participant
I was wondering what you ladies think…
My son is terrified of the water. I have him and my 2 girls in swim lessons right now. They are older…11,9,and 8. The girls do OK until they are made to jump in. We have moved around a lot and so I never got the opportunity to put them in it when they were younger. But he gets really upset about it. I am not sure on what to do. Do I make them keep going or do I stop? They make the kids jump in before actually leanring to swim and my son is just not going to do it. He is way too scared. He gets nervous about it the night before and now my girls are starting to feel the same. Just needed some suggestions please! Thank you!!!
December 4, 2012 at 3:22 am
curlywhirly
Participant
I think you need to find a different place for lessons. They should accomodate kids with fears. My youngest child is adopted and had a lot of trauma related to water, and he also has sensory issues and water in his ears bothers him. I specifically sought out lessons where they would be firm but also take his individual issues into account. If they are good, they will work with the kids where they are, not make them all jump through the same hoops.
December 4, 2012 at 3:57 am
momto2blessings
Participant
My daughter hated group lessons and wasn’t making much progress. I was fortunate to find a couple high school/college age girls from swim teams who gave private lessons rather reasonably and it made a huge difference.
December 4, 2012 at 4:19 am
Jenni
Participant
We live near the ocean and are out on our boat often. We are around water all the time, so we’ve let our girls know that they HAVE to take lessons until there are no more to take. Are you near water? Are your kids near it without you around? I grew up on the Great Lakes and saw several neighbor kids drown. My parents still never thought we should learn to swim so I’ve never had a lesson. My dd5 can already swim better than I can. It’s scary to me, so I always keep my float coat on. If you don’t think your kids will be around water, maybe they could do without instruction?
BUT, if you keep them in lessons, ditto finding another place. They should not be forcing your kiddos to jump in to water over their heads so soon. If some kids want to, fine. But that should be optional. I’d also check in to private lessons. One-on-one with a good instructor did wonders for my oldest dd.
Also, my DH takes the kids every week for just some quick show-me-what-you-learned-in-lessons-this-week review stuff, then they play and swim and have fun for an hour after that. It really helps their comfort level to be in the water regularly for fun rather than focus. And dads are GREAT for making kids not even realize that they’re in the water (formerly a scary place) and having a ton of fun. I really notice it during lessons. HTH.
December 4, 2012 at 11:01 am
jeaninpa
Participant
I didn’t have many opportunities to swim when I was growing up and was always a bit fearful of water. Now I consider it a necessary skill and my children have spent many happy hours at swimming pools. They’ve all taken lessons, but the best teacher seemed to just be free time spent at the pool with no pressure. I’d skip the lessons for now and spend time as often as possible at the pool.
December 4, 2012 at 11:50 am
RobinP
Participant
Some colleges won’t even let you graduate until you can swim across the pool and back, Union University being one of many. My boys, ages 8 and 9 are the same way. I will never put them in group lessons and have a hard time finding someone around here who teaches privately.
December 4, 2012 at 1:33 pm
Monica
Participant
My oldest was like that, and I’ll be honest, group lessons did not work for him at all. We tried two different places – one with an excellent swimming lesson program.
We took a year off (maybe two?) and then my DH started taking him to the pool at a local gym once a week. He learned so quickly.
I was afraid of water as a kid and I hated lessons. Being afraid and having the pressure of group lessons did nothing to ease my fear. When I was about 10, my dad worked with me very, very briefly one day, and I practiced the rest of the day until I got it. That was it.
Anyway, prayers for you and your son. It’s very difficult.
December 4, 2012 at 2:07 pm
missceegee
Participant
I consider swimming an essential life skill for everyone. Unless you live in a desert, you will be around water at some point. Over the years, I’ve pulled 3 different kids out of my pool and saved them from drowning. Each time the mother was by the water’s edge with her back turned momentarily. People envision kids splashing and screaming when they drown, but often they simply slip quietly under and you don’t hear a thing. Watchful eyes are a must. Kids need to respect, but not fear the water and that transition can take time. Having the skills to be in and around the water safely makes all the difference.
That said, private lessons are more costly, but they are also more effective. All of my kids learned to swim as infants with Infant Swim Research (ISR). Mine are 11, 8, 5, 3 now and they are little fish. ISR is proven methodology and many instructors will work with older kids and not only infants.
December 4, 2012 at 4:28 pm
Jennifer
Participant
Thanks ladies! My husband and I talked last night and he feels like we should give them a break and ask a good friend of mine who has a pool if we can take them and teach them ourselves. 🙂 I am searching for another place but we live in a small town and in the desert. 🙂 We will also be moving to Ireland and so I know its not critical at this point but I have just been thinking about them when they are older. I learned to swim and I am thankful for that but I also love to swim! I just dont want them ever in a situatuion where it is critcal to know how to swim!! I do agree they should work with each individual child. I also think they are more use to working with younger children!!
December 4, 2012 at 7:04 pm
artcmomto3
Participant
I have a friend who says there is no other program like ISR! I would have gone that route with all 3 of mine if it was available within 30 miles, but the closest is 1 1/2 hrs. away. Instead we have gone with private lessons. My oldest started at age 4. Her brother was 2, and I was doing a mommy & me class with him. They taught some of the same principles as ISR, and when he slipped in a swimming pool (with a lift jacket on), his immediate response was to flip onto his back. He started private lessons the following year. DD who turned 8 this fall felt confident in swimming for the first time this past summer. I have peace now knowing that she can swim well. DS5 can swim short distances, but he lacks the confidence. DS2 will start private lessons next fall when he is 3. I wish we could have started before their first birthday (ISR), but nothing like that is available here.
Keep looking…you want the teacher to be firm but understanding. I have been really impressed with our latest instructor. She knows how to handle DS5 really well (I believe he has SPD, but I haven’t had him tested for it yet). She knows when to push him and how far. He trusts her now too, which helps a lot.
December 4, 2012 at 10:46 pm
chocodog
Participant
I know that is it critical for everyone to learn how to swim. I have heard of several people in our area who have been fishing in a boat or on a peer and fell off. They would have lived if they knew how to swim. It is better to learn when they are younger.Someday they will be adults whom may have to save their childs life.
My daughter was about 4 but I remember going to the lake when I was a child and my father trying to teach me how to float. He would hold me on my back. He told me to put my head back and hold my breath. and relax. I practiced and practiced until I could do it without anyones help. He even showed me the dead mans float on my stomach first so I got the idea. It was cool to make people think you were dead floating in the water. (or so I thought) 🙂 Anyway, That is how I learned. I remember when I was about 5 they put me in a swim class at the Y. I also remember they made me blow bubbles and I had to see how many fingers they were holding up under the water… Well, I didn’t like opening my eyes underwater because of the clorine. It burned. to this day I won’t do it. I even plugged my nose for years. I do remember the instructor being very harsh when I guessed how many fingers he was holding up. (I Guessed) I even remember him calling me a name and being mad at me because I didn’t want to open my eyes. I felt so bad about myself. It was unnessicary for him to do that. He could have told me ok. Try again later but he didn’t. He ridiculed me. So, my point is…. If your son isn’t comfortable then maybe you should teach him. You know him best. We took my oldest daughter to family night swim. I think it was free for families at the time. She enjoyed it and that was how she learned. It wasn’t from the instructors. Mine wasn’t from the instructors. We both learned from our parents. That one on one time in the pool. Since then I have taught my other children. We went down to the beach. I let them go in and sure watched them. But, they learn better by just being in the water. Now, I do have a 6 yr old that was hit by a big wave from a boat and knocked over. She is pretty reluctant to get in the water. However she has 2 older brothers whom like to sort of tease also. So, she will take a little longer to learn. She has practiced how to float. She is doing much better. I predict she will be swimming like a fish before the end of next summer. Some children it just takes longer… Give it a go. They will remember it if they have you as a teacher instead of some instructor that doesn’t care about them.
Blessings!
December 5, 2012 at 1:56 am
LindseyD
Participant
Jennifer, we put our kids in swimming lessons when they were both scared of water and it had opposite effects on each of them. The lessons made dd extremely comfortable with water, even at 4 years old. She wasn’t swimming by the end of the lessons, but she was ready to try. For ds, the lessons had the opposite effect. He went into the lessons scared of water and came out of them even more scared. This was three years ago. We decided to skip future lessons and instead just made sure they were around water during the summer as much as possible.
That first summer at 5 years old, dd was totally at home in the water. Ds, however, still wouldn’t get in past 12-18 inches, wouldn’t go under, couldn’t hold his breath, etc. So we kept at it. They grew up a year and that next summer was a big difference for ds. He was still afraid of going down the slide and going underwater, but he would wear floaties and dog paddle. When we went on a cruise last April, he was swimming on the ship and in the ocean, even with the waves and using his goggles and snorkel to go underwater. This past summer, you never would have known that he had ever been afraid of the water.
Now, at 7 and almost 9, both are completely comfortable in water and have taught themselves to swim. They can hold their breath and go under, go down the slide, wear goggles and snorkels, jump off the side, and will stay in the pool until we make them get out.
I tell you that long story just to reassure you that they’ll do it when they’re ready. Whether it’s reading or tying their shoes or swimming, removing the outside pressure and just letting them be is, in my opinion, the key to their success. They get to do things on their terms and at their abilities, whether mental or emotional. I’d let it go and not worry about it at all. And, it may be that your child never likes to be around water, and that’s ok too. So they won’t be Olympic swimmers…oh well…
I do agree that at some point your child needs to learn to swim. It is an essential life skill and you never know when it might save their life or someone else’s.