Oh boy, that is hard to type. I love all of my children. Howver, there is one child that I struggle to like. This has been going on for years. I often think that if she were an or associate or neighbor, I would be cordial, but never develop a friendship with her. Our personalities are not compatable.
She is a rather negative, critical person. She is very self absorbed. Yes, she is a teen and all can be that way. But she has always been this way- even when she was little. She is never satisfied with anything I do. I am never meeting her expectations. IF she says 50 things to me- 49 and 1/2 are negative or “I want” or “I need you to…”. She has to be made – always- to do her share around here. Let’s face it- she doesn’t. She does that bare minimum with no initiative to do beyond. And she only does that because she is forced. Not out of the goodness of her heart.
We spend more money on her hobbies than anyone else, we spend more time on her as well. She certainly gets plenty of attention from us all.
She can be quite fun-loving with her siblings but is quick to criticize and shout at them. She is demanding with them all.She is always right. They are always wrong. They take it fairly well. But I see them begin to shun her at times also. She is not particulary loving and affectionate in the way the rest of us are. No one else in our family behaves this way.
She is the one that is the cause of most of the grief between sibilings and most of the drama. She is not disrepectful – at least we accomplished that! But we just don’t get along. My husband agrees that she is difficult to enjoy being around – although he only deals with her in snippets so he has more patience.
His only comment to me really is that I have to give more grace. Oh, I want to. My heart hurts over this. It feels like a loss. I have such a great relationship with my 3 other children, but not her. I had a great relationship with my mother. I wanted that for us, but I fear it is not possible. Advice on how to cope? Is there any hope for a change? What have I done wrong? I don’t want this to negatively affect her adult life. Ugh!!!