Binky, I do feel for you on that! One thing that may really help is to look at SCM’s book Laying Down the Rails on habit training; it’s helped me hugely around here to put some of this stuff into practice. The idea of sitting together quietly for read-alouds is a habit that you’ll likely have to build up to if they’re not used to doing it nicely together, maybe starting with smaller chunks (so that they can behave nicely during that time) and gradually building. Perhaps littlest can have something special like a puzzle he doesn’t usually get to play with during that time as he learns this is quiet time for him too.
Our kids don’t always agree on the read-alouds; there is one during the day that I read, which usually correlates with our history studies, and another, in the evening, which my husband reads and is usually a classic, things like Little Britches or Pollyanna, or a missionary story. It is tricky for your age range, and it’s possible you might want to split into two groups, with the oldest three, and youngest, listening to different books. The daytime read-alouds, I require narration for and it’s schoolwork, so they have to listen. The ones most inclined not to listen get to narrate first :-).
I get the rambunctous boys! 5 of my 6 are boys, 4 homeschooling now. At one point I realized I was raising my voice more than I liked during those times when they’d horse around during read-alouds, and I needed to break the cycle. I did two things. One, I became more stragetic about where I placed them in the room (thankfully I don’t have to do that anymore), and two, I would just stop reading, put the book down in my lap and wait quietly until they stopped. They knew this gig from driving – if it got too noisy, I’d pull over to the side of the road and sit silently until they settled down, and they’d start to say, “Ready! Ready!” And then I’d sit for one or two minutes more, silently, with them silent, before I’d drive. Thankfully I don’t have to do that anymore either! In any case, at reading time, I’d put the book down and sit quietly, and whoever was being attentive would look up and start elbowing or signaling whoever was goofing around, or I’d clear my throat for attention, ’til that child would look up, apologize and stop. The “goofer” might lose a privelege if he was really pushing it, and that started to sink in. A funny thing, if I have a cold and clear my throat, I get the immediate attention of any of my children in the room now, including my 19-year-old daughter LOL, I apparently have them trained.
I totally get what you’re saying about programs that spell it out for you. I am recognizing more and more how challenged I am in executive skills (planning, etc) and how much better school goes when it’s planned out and I have the books on the shelf. This year we combined our two 11-year-olds and our 14-year-old in a Heart of Dakota program for that reason (the older boy with extension reading) and it really helped me stay on track, and for me, was worth the money. Our 9-year-old listens in on their scheduled read-alouds and can draw or work on handwriting during that time, but he also has his own read-alouds we do together at another time.
Blessings,
Aimee