This is my first post on these forums, but I have been lurking for awhile. 🙂
I want to ask the advice of those who may have more of a handle on this particular habit than I do. I am trying to train my children to obey and respect me. I have read Raising Godly Tomatoes and am trying to follow her advice as well as I can, but my problem seems to be me! I have a habit of “retreating” or “escaping” into my head during the day as I go about my tasks and sometimes the children will be right next to me fighting or doing unacceptable things, and I don’t even notice until things have already escalated!
So how can I cultivate the habit of attention in myself? How do I live in this very moment and stay present???
I think you’re right- it does help to get up ahead of them for prayers and Bible reading. I need to establish that habit too I guess. 🙂
I try so hard to stay present, but I keep finding myself slipping away- I daydream while I’m washing dishes or I go on the computer for “just a quick sec”, and the next thing I know I’m jerked back to reality by screaming and shouting. I guess maybe I need to figure out what triggers me to tune out so I can find ways to avoid those things or change them somehow. I know Internet is a big one and I have done better with that since I realized it, but I could still do more.
Oh, the internet is a huge one for me, too. I find, if I keep the computer off until they’re in bed, I can’t be distracted. Of course, by the time they’re all in bed, it’s time for hubby time. LOL It’s a vicious circle, kwim? I am easily distractable, as well (just ask my hubby – no, don’t…). Wish my parents had trained me in all these habits when *I* was young!
Sometimes I use computer time as a down time for me. Anxiety’s sometimes creep in and I need a break. I think I go into that “Zone out” mode when I have so many things to do. I hate to admit it but I like my own little world. I feel comfortable there. 🙂 I wish I could come out of it easily. I however have Myophasia Pain syndrome and it sends me into “fogs” I could be in one for a long time and not even know it. I have talked with others that have Fibromyalsia and MS and they experiance this also. So something to think about if you have one of these problems. It is just you and you may not be able to come quickly back to reality. 🙂
I would totally agree on the distraction of the computer and having time in the a.m. before the kids get up. I desperately need time before my kids get up to get fully ready for the day (as much as I can, anyway). That means shower, face, hair, clothes, and prayer time. If I can catch some pc time, then that’s fine…I always have emails waiting. If I can’t and can get them started on “whatever” then I can get to the pc later. I also keep a close eye on the clock to tell me how much time we have before we may have to go somewhere and that keeps me from zoning out. I used to live by the clock years ago, but I got out of that habit and have paid the consequences. I don’t like to skip lessons or get to our outside activities late (neither do my kids), so keeping track of the time let’s me know that I have to stay present so we can get through x, y, and z before lunch, activities, dinner, etc.
Don’t know if that helps at all, but I do know what you’re talking about.