I second that, Amen; Well said, Doug! I’m so glad that the answers to these questions are pouring forth. This will be an excellent tool for us to refer to – thanks a bunch!
I think the best response I’ve ever heard to the “socialization” issue was by R.C. Sproul Jr. in the book When You Rise Up. Here’s a bit of his answer:
“It {the Bible} tells us that it equips us for every good work. It tells us likewise that we are to raise our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. But it not only doesn’t tell us how to socialize our children, but doesn’t tell us that they should be socialized. There is no commandment from God, “Thou shalt socialize thy children.” In fact, I’m sometimes a little unclear as to what it is these objectors are seeking for my children. What does it mean to be socialized?………What they want for my daughter….is for her to be hip to all the things other ten-year-olds are concerned about, like fashion labels, television shows, pop singers, and other essentials to the good life. They are concerned that my daughter is not under the sway of Madison Avenue, that she is free. But I have none of that concern. I raise my daughters, her sisters, and her brother to be free. Their identity is in Christ, not in pop culture.”
He goes on to address (very well, IMO) the questions of “what about their ability to get along with those who are different?”, “how will they meet people where they are?”, “how will they witness if they never run into the lost?” Definitely worth reading!
Socialization is one of my favorite questions that I get asked. Before I answer though, just know that my children do misbehave, but as a general rule are pretty decent.
“So what about socialization?” someone asks.
My reply, ” Do my children seem well behaved? Have you noticed not treating someone right?”
Them usually, “Yes, them seem like good children.”
Me, “Then I think we are good and I don’t want any socialization to ruin it. Any other questions?”
Yes, I can be sarcastic.
As for the college question, most colleges like homeschoolers because they know how to be independent learners and they actually seek out homeschoolers.
Last night we were at a family gathering full of public and private school nieces and nephews. I stepped in on a comment one of the children made to our two boys. They said, “I wouldn’t want to be homeschooled because I couldn’t stand not having socialization”. The other children proceeded to agree. You can imagine the embarrassment of my boys. Their faces turned red and they didn’t know what to say.
With that said, I remembered this thread and found comfort in reading it today. I’ve wondered if these “Homeschooling Q’s and A’s” would also be good for our kids to know – that they would be able to answer confidently when questions (or comments as stated above) arise. What do you think?
Thanks again to everyone who has shared in this post – I’d love to hear even more, if you feel compelled to do so! It so good to know we are not alone on this journey!
We often discuss these and other things around the dinner (and breakfast, and lunch) table so the kids can develop their thoughts and articulate the issues. In fact, one of our older teens recently read us a great quote in a letter to the editor of World magazine. It was in response to an essay (“Social Insecurity”, Sept. 12) written by someone who was homeschooled and felt like she missed the social aspects of her experience, particularly things related to dating and pop-culture. Here’s part of the response:
‘When a classroom child cops an attitude, we shrug and say, “Well, kids are like that,” but when a homeschooled child hits a social glitch, we say, “Well, he was homeschooled, you know.” Would that we said, of the young person who resents authority, “Well, his education was farmed out to an institution, you know,” and of one awkward around the opposite gender, “Well, kids are like that.”‘
To: all4purity! With your permission I am going to use your “mall analogy” with the next stranger who asks about socialization. I almost fell off my seat laughing!