I completely understand and do not feel as if you are “hemming and hawing,” this can take time to iron out and you must ask questions, get feed back, mull it over, etc. to see what will work for your family.
I say let her do the living books and ask for narration, include some activities (field trips, crafts, whatever), timeline, and some discussion. I do not read ‘history’ to all of my kids either (we tried that with MOH)…my 12yo reads from his book list (narrates/timeline/discussion) but I read to my 8yo or have him read a smidge to himself. My 8yo still prefers that I read ‘history’ to him, so I do (my 5yo listens in) then he has a timeline book that he adds characters to and he narrates some to me. We do listen to audio books together (for history), but we do not do history together. We do Bible and Geography together, which works out fine.
We don’t do science together anymore either. We did the 106 Days, which was great, but I have little people that are from a different planet than their older brother. He’s too “old” for the fun stuff they like and cramps their style…so he does his own (Apologia) and they do Outdoor Secrets. It may seem like a lot for me, but my oldest is very independent so other than gathering supplies from Walmart he might need for an experiment, he reads, narrates, fills in the notebook, does experiments, discusses new findings with me, etc. So, it’s more like I’m doing science with 2 kiddos using the same program, and it’s working thus far:)
My 12yo does nature study, takes field trips, and may read, just for fun, from the books that are for my younger two, so he’s still ‘with us,’ just in a different way.
Hope this helps, and doesn’t confuse….everyone tweaks things to fit their family dynamic, so don’t feel bad if you feel you need to do the same thing.