Helping your Daughter with Self Image / Mom-Daughter Relationship

Hello!

Our DD is 12yo, and we recently found out that she is having some challenges in the area of body image (trying to lose weight :() and being a little too concerned with boys and the way she looks in general. She has always been more bookish, and we put some of this down to a couple of older friends she has made at church. We plan on steering her toward girls her own age, but in the meantime, I am struggling with how to:

Help her focus on the important stuff: relationship with God and family, school and hobbies, etc..

Develop a closer bond with her so that she can come to me with the issues she faces in adolescence. I would love advice on what kind of quality time activities you do with your daughters? Do you have a special day you spend with them or activity outside the home?

Help her select friends more wisely (especially since she is VERY tall for her age – she is 12yo and is 5’6″). We find that older girls and boys are constantly recruiting her for their group. They aren’t bad boys and girls – just too old for her!

Build her self worth and knowledge of herself based on things other than her looks. She is very gifted, but since we aren’t competitive and don’t give grades, I don’t think she gets much self-esteem from her talents and giftings. Is it right to expect that she should be proud of skill mastery and excellent work? Is that Godly?

As you can see, I haven’t really explored these issues yet. Any book recommendations for me would be very much appreciated!! Thank you!