Help with my daughter

   I am not one who usually gives advice; rather I do alot of asking!.. However, If you read some posts/questions I have done in past, you may find some helpful tips.. My 14 year old son has so many learning difficulties and delays for various reasons; we have many anxious days whether he has a formal diagnosis or not, I do not know.  I can tell you, the one consistent thing the moms here keep reminding me, is “less may be more, progress is progress, teach the child, not the curriculum/grade level, and so on.  Last fall, my son (after only 2 years of homeschool) decided he wanted to go back to a “real school” , mainly for social.. We knew good and well, it would not be easy for him; however, we went through the screening tests etc. to see where they would place him.  Minimally, they wanted to place him a grade behind, but also set him up for much time spent in the sped. room.  This devastad him, and he decided to stay home.  We have found a co-op that meets one day, and a biology (Apologia for high) homeschool class that meets weekly. I asked the teacher if he could come; he may not be able to do as well as his peers, but just being with others “his grade” (besides sisters at home) would do wonders for his self-esteem, and it has.  Perhaps you could find a co-op group with some teens, with a flexible teacher.  If not, just teach her at a level she is comfortable; the moms here have also told me not to set him up for failure; and not to worry about “catching up”.  “Find the things that bring your child joy in school, like art, music etc.” a mom told me just yesterday in a post (how often dictation/spelling; map practice); read this one, it really helped me to remember to slow down, enjoy, and go at his pace.  BTW, we call him a “ninth grader” for peer purposes, whether we get done by 18, 19, it’s ok.  Just want to make sure he gets the basics down pat, not necessarily all the extras a college bound may need.

Ok – this is coming from someone that personally deals with anxiety and depression – and honestly I’m not sure I have the answer…..

I’d come up with (with her input?) some basic must-do items.  But one main thing I’d really make sure of is that she spends some time outside everyday – preferably with something active too.  Make sure she is eating properly.  Those 3 things can make someone depressed feel much better, at least for a short time.

You’ve gotten some great advice on depression.  You also asked “My question is…picking out a history and science curriculum that she can “handle”, andmaybe some advice on how to handle days when she just doesn’t do  much.  And do i accommodate and keep her schedule/studies minimal, easy and something she can maybe finish?  Or do I try to encourage her to do what a typical 8/9th grader would be doing.” 

My 15 y/o daughter is very challenging, and sounds similar to your dd.  We’ve tried all kinds of curriculums & styles.  Then I learned about CM and was hooked.  This year we went full-bore into CM, and so far it’s been the best year yet, though we still have some issues when I ask her to do something she’s not expecting — she kind of freezes up, gets very emotional and shuts down. Sigh.  BUT, it’s much better than it’s been in the past.  For history we’re using SCM Module 5.  I’ve had to use books “below” her grade level in order to spark her interest and prevent meltdowns.  I figure any living book is worth reading, and she actually is learning from them, so it’s progress.

For science, she is using the Biology 101 dvd’s, with added reading on the various topics being covered.  She’s in 10th grade.  If I were considering her not-quite-high-school-yet, I’d let her choose a science subject to study and let her go to town on that, using Apologia’s elementary books, Answers in Genesis, or another well-written course that could be done in a CM way.  My 13 y/o dd with Asperger’s Syndrome is doing that this year (she chose Apologia’s Anatomy & Physiology) and this is the first year she has ever done science without tears and fighting.  CM has been so helpful to our family!  I hope you and your dd can find something that she can enjoy getting into.