Help! CM confidence crisis

Okay, here is my take…

1.  Oral is fine for the ages listed.  My older two LOVE writing (14 and 12) but my 10 year old, not so much.  When I ask the 10 year old to do written narrations it is in a more creative form…ie. write a letter from character A to character B.  Write an advertisement for the ________.   She has a lot of fun with these.  

2.  With a now 14 year old going into grade 10 I can assure you that less is more!  The years when I went nuts trying to “prove” or “show” that we’ve been learning were not good years.  yes, we have some beautiful lapbooks and notebooks but they didn’t retain the information any better than when we had a good discussion about it or just read and orally narrated.  My kids are not standing with their peers academically, they are miles ahead because they read and read and read and retain the information.  Both my 14 year old and 12 year old attended school for a short period of time (months) and it was evident that they were well above their grade level in all subjects.  I don’t say this to brag, rather to assure you that the CM method works!

3.  I schedule books on the organizer and just organize them in order with no dates attached.  We do go slowly most of the time and yes, life gets crazy at times and we have to skip things and come back to them later.  I had planned to finish up one of our history books with the kids over the summer but it just didn’t happen.  No worries, we’ll pick it up in the fall and continue where we left off.   

4.   I’m starting a box for my almost 3 year old this year with activites he can do while the others (there are 5 altogether) are working.   I have a few sticker activity books, lego, playdough, felts and paper, scissors and glue (a favourite!).  He also will join us in our handicraft sewing project by sewing on buttons.  He is free to go outside to explore our yard as well.  I do five in a row with my 5 year old and the almost 3 year old listens to the stories.  I wouldn’t bother with anything more formal than reading book!

5.  Guidance, yes, at least that has been my experience.  As for spelling, I too have a very creative daughter (now 12) and she struggles with spelling. It is not important to her.  The copywork and dictation help a lot because she can see how the words are supposed to be spelt.  We also have had some success with sequential spelling which is great because it only takes a few minutes each day…she does well with the patterns.  Short lesson and lots of variety seem to be the key for my kids.  If math only takes 20 minutes then it is doable…45 minutes and things fall apart and they start to dislike the subject (unless it is their passion!).  

When we are having a rough day, week, month..I just read to them and we get outside to explore.  Nothing like a day at the beach looking for crabs or a hike in the forest that makes me feel so thankful for the time I have with my children.   Even just  walk around the block seems to work for us.  When I’m feeling really frazzled  and tired (ie. with a sick child or one that was up in the night with nightmares or wet bed) We do what we need to do to get through the day so we can start fresh and ready the next day or week.  This might mean everyone works on projects of their choice (son loves computer programming, daughter loves painting, other daughter loves constructing with old bits of wood and hammer and nails, 5 year old son plays lego and 2 year old putters) or it might mean we watch some excellent documentaries (I have a list that we work through during the year).  I have stopped beating myself up for days that don’t go by the schedule, we adapt and most everything gets done in the end and that that doesn’t, well, their is always next year!

Just quickly as I have very little time – but I am also in the UK.

I don’t have the answer to every question (it’s your journey) but I do know the feeling of tired with 4 kids, overwhelmed, liking CM but fearing it’s not enough, and trying various different HE approaches.  But I’ve learned that my children and I are so much happier and learn so much better when I simplify, and I’ve come to learn to trust the CM approach and Sonya’s experience which she shares here on SCM

So I’d say first up, get some rest and regular bed-times.  Its much easier to see things clearly after a few good nights’ sleep.

Then work on simplifying – and keep on simplifying, until you’ve reached a place of calm. Look at each the stress-points in your schedule and write out what you would need to do to take away the stress – because after all children aren’t going to learn and are going to hate school when there’s stress. 

I read this wonderful quote the other day, and I can’t remember where I read it, but it said this: “Keep cutting back until there is peace in your home”.

So you will have a much better idea than me how to go about this, but these are my brief thoughts on each of your points:

1. I tried notebooking last year and it brought so much stress into our house.  Then I read that CM did not switch to written narrations until age 9 or 10.  So I stopped and this year have only been doing oral narrations (my eldest is 8) and we’ve achieved so much more. So I’d say stop notebooking for certain with the youngest 2.  With your oldest you might like to do a little, but build it up slowly.  Try to read up on the SCM learning library and curriculum guide how to go about this in a gentle way.

2. As you read more about how CM works, I think your confidence in it will build.  If you have a chance to buy the Learning and Living DVD set, I’d really recommend it but it’s expensive to ship to the UK, but try to read as much as you can about how CM works. I’ve found that the more I’ve used CM the more I can see my children’s minds and ability to express themselves growing, and they are in no way behind other school age kids of their age.

3. Sometimes life gets really busy (new baby, illness etc) and I think you’d feel under pressure and behind whatever HE approach you were using at those times.  I’d look at how much you are scheduling – maybe too much.  (Eg are you trying to fit in more than SCM suggests or AO suggests?  If so, that’s probably too much). If you do need to cut back for a short season, cut back on the non-essentials ( not maths for example) or on the number of books you are using for a particular subject.  But in my experience, I’ve found that if I’m really strict with myself about staying focussed on lessons so that we keep then short, as per CM, then it’s amazing how much we achieve.  So ask yourself if you’re spending too long on each lesson (15-20 mins or less)

4. Have you looked at ths SCM Early Years guide?  There is a lot of helpful stuff there.  Also have you used Kumon workbooks – I find these very helpful at this age to teach skills such as cutting – when you come to do Maths age 4, its a huge help if your child has already mastered cutting, and can cut out shapes on his own.  I would not try to fit in extra curriculum like 5 in a row – you sound too busy already.

5. I honestly think if you were going all out CM philosophy, you and your daughter would be enjoying it so much more.  The more I’ve switched to CM, the more my 8 year old has enjoyed it, and the less upset there has been over mistakes, and the less dawdling over work.  I’d say use the CM organiser, print out her Assignment Page and Schedule, give it to her at the beginning of the day and have her mark it off as she goes along. That way she has a sense of control and urgency to keep up with the schedule.  Switch to SCM handwriting curriculum – I did this year and found it so calming.  Eg start with Print to Cursive Proverbs or Hymns in Prose Copybook. Then start Spelling Wisdom  – I’m sure her spelling will improve with that.  And give lots and lots of praise. We use Rightstart Maths and it’s WONDERFUL. I don’t know life of Fred so can’ comment.  Yes lots of guidance is still needed at this age.  Follow the SCM Curriculum guide to see how much. I have my 8 year old spend 30-45 mins on copywork, maths, assigned reading etc then I work one-to-one with her for another 30-45 mins. Then we work as a famiy on history, geog, bible, and all the other family subjects

6. I’m probably not the best person to answer this question – I don’t have experience of this age or AS. But with CM its OK to cover a lot of subjects in a day, so long as you keep lessons short.  Don’t tire him or yourself out with long lessons.

I hope that’s some help.  Oh, I use Flylady.net to help you keep on top of my daily routines – it helps me enormously not to get overwhelmed.

Hi everyone,

I have a 9 yr old dd and 12 yr old ds, this will only be our 2nd year of homeschooling.  For those of you who responded to this topic would you mind telling me how you go about all of the reading.  Do you read all the subjects to your children outloud, or do they read some silently themselves and you only do so many read alouds?  I am confused on how much reading the children should be doing and how much the parent should be doing.