Food rules for family?

We generally accept whatever is offered at others’ homes. Thankfully, most of our friends eat very similarly to our family, so fellowshipping with friends is generally easy. My husband is a pastor at our church, and it’s very difficult to avoid the unhealthy foods that are served at potlucks and such, so we just bring our own stuff and share with others as needed. My mom and my in-laws are very understanding about our dietary choices and cooperate with us about 90% of the time. We are blessed in that regard. However, as grandparents, I can’t expect them not to want to spoil our kids a little, and for those times, it’s ok with me because it’s not the norm. Food dyes, MSG, margarine, and refined sugar are the main things that make me cringe. We won’t scoff at foods if they’re offered, but we will politely avoid them.

Regarding staying away from dh and I, our children are allowed to spend the night in only two places: at my mom’s or at my in-laws’. In fact, dh and I are celebrating our 10th anniversary this weekend, and we are leaving town for 4 days. The kids will be with my in-laws during that time, and I trust them completely. I’m sure they’ll be eating some junk food, but I am sending a few things for snacks, and I’m preparing a casserole to give at least one healthy option and to lighten the load for my MIL. Our children spend the night at my mom’s about once a month, and it’s a nice break for dh and me. They watch a lot of movies when they’re with my mom, but that’s my only complaint. She is a good judge of shows, and knows our standards of viewing, so they don’t see inappropriate stuff. If aunts and uncles lived closer, we also would not have a problem spending the night with them because we trust them completely.

You just have to set boundaries with people. It may be awkward for you to have that conversation, but does the awkwardness outweigh the standards you feel you need to set for your own kids? Your dh probably needs to be the initiator of any conversations with his parents, but you should still be present to voice your concerns and set boundaries that you and your dh decide on ahead of time.

I agree with Rachel, It would become a power play and only get worse.

I think I would make sure you stuffed him really well with good foods before he was allowed to go to Grandpa and Grandmas. I then would call them or go get him every 3 hours to make sure you stuff him again before he allowed to go back.

This way he is full and won’t want those bad things. Don’t allow him out of the house in the morning until he has eaten. This way he won’t get the junk,,, or at least all of it. If they stuffed him full of junk I wouldn’t let him out again until he ate the good food you provide. This will train him that he must save himself for the good things and not the bad. It will also make you feel better about how much good food he is eating. Sometimes we have to be wise as serpents. 🙂

I wish you much happiness in your endevour. I hope you gleaned some wisdom and experience from those on here. You have a blessed day!