Name: Thrive! NCHE Homeschool Conference
Start: 2025-05-22T00:00:00-05:00
End: 2025-05-24T23:59:59-05:00
Location: Winston-Salem, NC

This topic has 6 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 14 years, 1 month ago by Sonya Shafer.

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April 5, 2011 at 5:38 am
Sue
Participant
This may get a little long, but if you are homeschooling a special needs child, I’m hoping you can offer a little support or a few suggestions. I’m a little too drained to think things through.
I have always homeschooled my 3 children (Almost-13yo dd, 11yo ds, 10yo dd). The first few years we traditionally homeschooled with various workbooks & materials. After my husband & I separated, I enrolled them in an online public charter school for a couple of years. (They were still at home, but it wasn’t the best option.) During this time, it was recommended by our pediatrician (who kept saying she didn’t think ds had autism) that we take him for behavioral counseling. We did, and after a few visits, the therapist suggested having him tested….for autism.
Ds was just shy of 9yo when he was diagnosed with mild autism and other issues involving anger and behavior. Since the online school was a public school, they developed an IEP for him which included weekly tutoring online with a special ed teacher, occupational therapy, and speech therapy (for receptive and expressive language). He also continued seeing the behavioral psychologist.
This fall, I took all 3 children out of the online public school and began traditionally homeschooling using CM methods and the huge blessing I discovered called the Simply Charlotte Mason Curriculum Guide. It has been working well, but my son no longer receives OT or SLT. (Insurance does not cover and I cannot afford on my very part time income.) I had thought I would apply for the Ohio Autism Scholarship program, but I’ve hit some snags with that. I’m not really sure I want to move forward with it anyway.
Briefly, the Autism Scholarship Program allows parents to take their child with autism, Asperger’s, or PDD-NOS out of the local public school and either put them in a private school that can better meet the goals in his/her IEP (and the program pays the tuition, up to $21,000/yr.), or they can homeschool them and the program then pays for tutors, OT, SLT, or other therapies specified in the IEP. It is public money from the Ohio Dept. of Ed. that funds this program.
In order to apply, you must have a diagnosis of autism (we do) and a current IEP written by the local school district (which we no longer do). So, I contacted the local school district (a large metropolitan district that is failing) and had a really hard time (over a month) getting anyone to return my calls or emails. Finally, we made contact, dropped off copies of ds’ testing and previous IEP (from the online school), and waited….and waited….was told it could take a couple of months…..so I waited. After feeling ignored for more than 2 months, I again called/emailed. Another couple of weeks, then I was told, the IEP is ready; come in and sign it. Of course, I asked to read it at home first….so I waited for another week or two, then I had a copy.
After all of this time, the new IEP looked like a rubber-stamp of the old one (with minor rewording)….except they completely left off OT and Speech! They have given me the run-around as to why, I have had supporting documentation sent to them from the OT therapist, his speech teacher from last year has not returned any of my phone calls, and I have simply been ignored since January. Meanwhile, I have been very busy teaching my son. He is progressing, but I can’t help but feel that more could be done for him.
Testing must be done every 3 years in order to maintain an IEP, so that would be coming up for him in a couple of months. However, I am leery of having the local school district do any testing with him. To be honest, I just had the strangest feeling back in the fall when I went to the district’s admin. bldg. to drop off paperwork. Also, I am a member of the Home School Legal Defense Association (HSLDA), and they highly recommend against taking any funds from a public school or state dept. of ed. program unless absolutely necessary.
This lengthy discourse leads me to my question: have any of you simply pressed onward after the original special needs diagnosis without ongoing or periodic testing, and if so, how have you figured out just what your child needs and what he/she doesn’t? As homeschoolers, we don’t ordinarily write a formal IEP (Individualized Education Plan) as public schools do, but what do you think ought to be established in its place? Anything? Or just our own plans as we would set them forth for our neuro-typical children?
I want my son to achieve as much as he possibly can, but I am starting to wonder how I can ensure that is happening. Any input that any of you have would be greatly appreciated.
April 5, 2011 at 5:29 pm
sheraz
Participant
I can’t answer all these questions since I am not qualified through experience with an autistic child, but I do have a child that has special needs and an IEP, that I am currently homeschooling because of the needs of this child.
All my stress of getting the plan done was because the school didn’t want to pay anything extra for anything. Also, they too kept rubberstamping the same one, like I can’t read! (They did keep pressuring me for a different specific diagnosis so that they could get more federal funding, which was supposed to pay for the very thing that she needed!!!, but they didn’t set up the plan for the help…) I am trying not to be rabid in my annoyance… sorry. By the way, none of the school personnel has returned phone calls or emails since I pulled my kids to homeschool.
I am not going to retest her because I can decide whether or not she is progressing, however slowly. It does frustrate me that is slow, but at least at home we can be secure in our love and support of each other. She is not made to feel stupid or less than she is because of the difficulties.
There are books that will help you write your own IEP for your son, I don’t have any titles in mind, but I have seen them. Basically, it would follow the Planning Your CM Education, with provisions written in there for his needs. The planning book that I read prior to going CM was that it would help prove that you are treating him in a manner that will ensure his advancement, which I think is what you are worried about. The book I have called “How To Write a Low Cost/No Cost Curriculum for Your Home-School Child” by Borg Hendrickson walked me through in greater detail about individual steps of achieving my goals than the SCM one.
In response to your concern about getting the help at home through the school – be careful about it. Once they have anything to say about your child, the greater chances are that they can legally dictate to you what, when, and how he will be taught, even in your home.
This probably wasn’t what you were wanting or needing, but it is my experience. I did really want to tell you that you are not alone and that YOU ARE the best thing for your child. You may need a little nudge to feel more secure in that, but you are!
Sheila

April 5, 2011 at 6:49 pm
Sue
Participant
Actually, Sheila, your comments are along the lines of what I’m wondering about. I am also feeling that the less involvement from the school district, the better (in the long run).
I’m glad to hear your suggestions about writing/establishing curriculum and that you’ve seen resources for developing one’s own IEP. I briefly visited the special needs section of HSLDA’s website, and they, too, have a resource for that–only I think it’s called something a little different. I’ll have to look into it further.
April 5, 2011 at 8:06 pm
Sonya Shafer
Moderator
sue-mom, we have homeschooled our youngest, who is on the autism spectrum and has some other developmental delays. We have never had her officially diagnosed, but we have done a whole lot of research and feel like we have a handle on her uniqueness.
As far as making progress and what to teach her goes, we have just taken that a step at a time. We started with the ABLLS skills, doing an evaluation ourselves every 6 months or so. That really helps me know what we need to work on, and we target our school plans for her accordingly. I add to that as much of an NT child’s plans she would be able to handle. Does that make sense?
One thing has helped immensely over the years: embracing the fact that we, as her parents, know her better than any teacher ever could. We see her 24/7 and, in most cases, the teacher would be coming to us to ask what we think and what we have observed anyway. So trust your mommy instinct. Do your research and homework, yes; but hold on to the fact that you will be the biggest advocate and hardest-working teacher that your child can have. There are lots of great resources out there, and the Lord will faithfully lead you each step of the way.
April 5, 2011 at 8:07 pm
sheraz
Participant
Something else you might think of, is having him retested by paying for that out of pocket – one of our clinics and our hospital rehab center can do the testing here, and will either allow you to get financial aid (ie payments) or will help you get a plan in place for you to do since you can’t afford a therapist. Also, are there autism places that will help financially? Anyway. if you do retest him, then as his parent and teacher, you would be able to write the goals and plans for him for the next three years anyway without additional stress. I can’t tell you not to re-test at all because I have no experience with his needs. In our situation, we got the diagnosis and then the dr gave us the ideas of how to help. When the school was unwilling to help, I pulled her out. A lot of her problems were just made worse in the classroom and we have adapted how we teach her. I have different expectations for her, but she still makes progress however slowly. =)
I am interested in other people’s experiences as well.
I just really wanted to send encouragement. I know that you will find the answer somewhere! You are amazing! =)
April 6, 2011 at 3:37 am
Sue
Participant
Thank you for all of your encouragement and suggestions. Sonya, I had never considered that I could acquire an appropriate test and administer it to my son myself. I suppose I just assumed such things were locked up tighter than Colonel Sanders’ secret recipe for KFC chicken. I will have to research that further.
Speaking of research….you know how there are summer camps for everything these days? You know, Equestrian Camp for those who want to immerse themselves into horses, Soccer Camp for those who want to spend their vacation playing soccer, Camp Rock for those who can’t get enough of fresh-faced teen stars who sing and dance….oh, wait, that was a teeny-bopper movie! Well, I think there ought to be a Special Needs Parent Research Camp. We could all gather in a large community cabin to flip open our laptops and Google ‘all things special needs’ during one session, then lounge by the pool while comparing notes on the last time we got ‘enough’ sleep….if we weren’t all napping by then!
Sue
April 6, 2011 at 7:52 pm
Sonya Shafer
Moderator
I think you may be onto something there!