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Discouraged and Defeated…
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Over the last month, I began a classical education program that’s at least 100 years old, has a solid reputation, etc, only to find myself drowning in extensive manuals for 2 young sons doing 2 different programs. What was I thinking? Well, I caved to external family pressures of “how will YOU know they are learning everything they need to know?” and so on…We just moved, a baby is on the way, I’ve had a hard time tuning out the negative from well meaning relatives and so here we are with a ton of colorful textbooks, manuals, thick workbooks.
I thought, “well, I’ll send back what’s not working for us” -which could easily equate to half of it at least and that would help lighten the heavy load and expense. However, it’s just too complicated, “they will take this/not that back” and so on, plus the added expense of shipping. So, I must just find a way to make it work.
Is is possible to complete Calvert with the Charlotte Mason model? Please help! I just found Sonya’s webpage (sad that I did not do so sooner!) But it’s right up my struggling 9yr old’s learning style! He has trouble keeping his attention on the workbooks and so on, has trouble with reading and math. Calvert would have the Kurzweil “books on tape” access and certain other things that are supposedly helpful to a dyslexic child online.
Has anyone ever made such dreaded mistakes and if so, how did you weather through it, hopefully through the lens of Charlotte Mason? Thanks for all inputs and God Bless you for sharing your knowledge, experience and time.
Dear lulalane, you are discouraged but NOT deafeated! I know that I am WAY too much of a rookie to really be giving out advice on homeschooling. We are only in our second official year, but I feel like I’ve been through the whole gamut of emotions already. If you have been called to home school, and you are seeking God’s guidance, then you have the wisdom and strength of Almighty God on your side!
James 1:3-5 has become my mantra: “My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”
God’s thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and He sees the big picture. He remembers that we are dust; and, He knows our frailty. But He is faithful to walk you through every step of the trial, no matter how difficult, no matter how hopeless it seems. I love the story of Joseph. Alone in a pit, beaten and betrayed by his own brothers, sold as a slave into a faraway country. If anyone had room to be angry and afraid, it was Joseph! But God saw the big picture, and had a plan to make the intended evil into something marvelously good. The truth is, we’re not supposed to be self-sufficient and have it all figured out. If we did, we wouldn’t need our heavenly Father, who has created us to be dependent on Him, and to glorify Him in our dependence on His grace, which is wholly sufficient.
I posted on another thread here that I had spent countless hours late into the night last spring looking at websites about home school curricula. In absolute despair, knowing I could never know what to choose and how to carry it off, I cried out, “Lord, please teach me how to teach my children!” I can’t remember if it was that night, or the next day, but I soon found Simply Charlotte Mason, which (so far) has included all the elements I wanted and needed in a home school plan for me and my kids. We are starting the Module 1 (my oldest is in 1st grade) this term, and so far, it has been so wonderfully manageable (and we have a 2 year old and almost 4 year old in the house too)! It was and is an answer to that prayer. Don’t think they’re getting enough or worried that they’re not grasping a certain skill/concept “on time”? There’s always next week, next month, next term, and next year… Your kids will not be ruined if it takes them 1 year, or 2, or 3 to get what some kids get in less time. Isn’t the flexibility part of the beauty of home schooling?!
So, to make a long story short, pray, pray, pray. And then pray some more. God is not unaware of your circumstances, He is providing for your children – you are just a tool in His loving hands, and He will not abandon you. The criticisms of onlookers will just have to take a back seat… which has taken a LOT for me to deal with too. They are YOUR children, not theirs. And the God of all creation is your “guidance counselor”!
I really hope this helps you through this rough spot. It WILL NOT always feel like this.
Blessings,
Angela
Hello,
I will say up front that I haven’t used Calvert or any other system besides CM. However, I think there are some basic changes you can make. First, whatever you can send back and get a refund on, do it or sell online at Amazon or HSLDA Market if you’re a member. Other than that, here are some basic ideas for you.
Keep the time frames CMish. Use the workbooks as guides (like the history, they are guides and check out or find free online or purchase books to read as living books) and use them orally. Use copywork, some can be found online for free or very inexpensively. Check out books from the library and start oral narration practice. For math, use the workbooks you have, but don’t give too much in the day and try some orally, too, maybe ten minutes worth only. If you need to add in manipulatives, do so. You don’t have to do what the teacher’s manual says. Use them in a way that works for you, you’re not their servant.
Could you give me some more details and maybe I could help some more?
Rachel
Lulalane,
Please know you are not the only one who has made an expensive mistake, or sat up nights fretting! All you need to do is search the last month’s threads where Amanda and I had the same experience. Breathe, pray, and know that you can do anything through Christ.
If you can’t return it or sell it, and you don’t like it at all; shelve it. You can always use the Modules here with the library links provided so you won’t be out anything financially. We’ve gotten some used books too. I’ve had to sell what I can and look at the rest as a learning experience. At least I know now what I *don’t* want to do. God has continued to give me amazing peace now.
I will be praying for you!
~ Cindie
Thanks to all; I do hope to hear from Sonya too!
Of course, there has been much prayer and I know Calvert students end up being advanced too; it’s just that how I wish it were more palatable to my sons and that is what I hope to acquire. I will be sending back a few things they’ve agreed to accept for refund and I don’t feel qualified to argue with their success re: reading/orton gillingham-based which has brought reading about for my son. However, just knowing how to implement Calvert via Charlotte Mason will be my challenge.
I also discovered Ron Davis last night; working with clay to teach math and reading which seems like something CM would have done! Anyway, if you have more thoughts, please share! I think I will be putting away some of the 2nd grade curriculum; my youngest (6yr old son) seems to be able to keep up in the Calvert’s 3rd grade core anyway along with brother-although he struggles a bit. It is that struggle that gets me “out of the box”, searching and then I found CM! So I just need to find out how to deliver Calvert to them with CM help…. :O)
That’s a tough one, Lulalane. I’m not at all experienced in Calvert. I just did a little reading and research on their Web site to try to get a feel for what kinds of materials you have to work with. My suggestions are pretty much the same as the other ladies who posted. (If something here doesn’t seem to fit what you have in hand, I may have looked at a different sample online.)
- Math: Shorten math lessons to 15-20 minutes max. If you have to do two lessons during the day in order to finish, spread them out and put other stuff in between.
- Science: Look at the topic they will be studying and find a living book about it to read first. Have them narrate the story, then use the science questions as follow-up, only if needed.
- Social Studies: same as science
- Reading: I don’t see a way to salvage the examples that I read online. If you can, return that portion and just read good books together and have the boys narrate.
- Spelling, Grammar, and Composition: Return these portions as well, if you can. In CM circles, you don’t start spelling lessons or composition until about 4th grade. If the boys are doing copywork and narration, you’re laying the foundation just fine.
- Art: Rather than pointing out aspects of the picture, as the lesson plan instructs, let the boys look at it and tell you about what they see. In other words, let them narrate first. Ideally you would focus on one artist for several weeks, but use what you can this year.
- Poetry: The one example I saw online was rather twaddly. But I don’t know if it is representative of all the poems. I guess I would just advise that you replace twaddly poems with beautiful ones.
As the other ladies have posted, too, we’ve all made purchases that we regretted later. My husband jokes about we have to “pay for our education.” So don’t let it weigh on you too heavily. I hope these suggestions help get your creativity rolling. Don’t feel like you have to know right now every tweak that you’re going to make all year. Take it in small chunks and ask the Lord to guide you. I’m sure He’ll bring just the idea and resource you need exactly when you need it throughout the coming months.
Thank you Sonya, I look forward to watching you dvd’s and we worked the calvert program today with your ideas; worked well. Perhaps it won’t be as bad as I was envisioning ~the literature no doubt is questionable, but so far, theme-based, such as “Adventures” and “Silly Stories” -both have drawn the boys to excitement or laughter ~which are both good I suppose! They had fun analyzing the stories anyway, so perhaps we’ll supplement with others on your list and use these for the actual assignments. I don’t like the science or the social studies they have afterall, so it will go back.
I’m thankful for your note about compositions – makes sense for these young ages; they are doing lots of copywork for now. Supplement art too – does seem shallow! Ohhhh, so many changes/expense but we’ll get through I suppose. Thanks for the support…
I just wanted to say that I totally understand what you are going through, and it WILL get better 🙂 I too bought the wrong thing this year, and spent too much money on things that did not work for us. So far I have been able to send back some, sell some online, and still have some more listed online to sell.
The thing that has helped me most was reading this SCM website and watching the Seminar on DVD. Then I went through all the stuff we had and pulled out what I thought could be used. Then I made a big pile of what I wanted to get rid of. Just making that stack helped me a lot! Then I have slowly been re-doing our schedule and making the best of it for this year.
The ladies on this forum are great, and anytime you need anything they will be great advisors.
Keep your head up!! 🙂
Amanda
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