I’ve been in your shoes and I’m here to encourage you that it can get better.
We’ve used many different approaches to spelling but I feel what really had to happen was for her to just mature and me to have more patience 🙂
People would say, after I asked for advice, that she needed to know all the rules so she could apply them. We tried that route in the past but I thought I’d give it another go. Trying it just made me realize I knew the answer and had to be patient, and going with all the rules wasn’t the route to take.
We are using Spelling Power again this year and along with her just maturing some, 12y.o., it is going well. S.P. is good for her because she only works on words she misspells and at that it’s only up to 5 words per day. It goes slow, not a new set of 20 words per week.
But I think the most helpful thing was that I realized she just needs more time to grasp the spelling issue and to let it take its course. This came after much frustration on both our parts and me feeling like I failed somewhere. If there was any failure it was only in my lack of patience 🙂
Right now we are going at the speed of dd, which is as long as it takes, taking a break from it now and again if need be, but continuously plugging away at it but still doing so gently.
Other things have been incorporated that are helping as well, like her blog and writing letters to her friends. She likes letter writing since she can look forward to a return letter. The blog has taken off and she loves to post. It’s completely private so it’s almost like email for family only. I edit both of those most days but not always.