CM and LOL (Kinda long)

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  • Kk
    Participant

    Hi folks

    Have any of you heard of LOL? It is for Lifestyle of Learning. By Marilyn Howshall. It is a belief that its a more biblical method of learning and it is delight directed. Not quite unschooling but the child does pursue their bents. I am intrigued by it but at the same time have been a CMer ( not necessarily SCM) for years. What I am finding is I have two adopted children with learning challenges that don’t get or aren’t interested in some of the things that are done in CM . ( such as art study, Shakespeare, ) so what I had been doing that is CM with them is selecting living books for their history, not following a time period per se, and doing oral and written narrations. Science/ nature study pretty much the same. But again I find that a daugh who has NO interest in the sciences, yet is passionate about her music and the arts. Therefore to allow her her passions makes for a more pleasant atmosphere and she is more inspired and devoted to these things. My 10 yr old is very hyperactive , so academia and him is a challenge. He has short attention span and cannot focus for long, although I work to increase that at all times. Presently,y, we do short CM style math, either one of us will read from a living book and orally narrate and then he does a page in penmanship. He has breaks in between , mucho prodding s to keep focused , etc, he has time outdoors, listens to the different birds etc (nature study) with all this being said, its the end of school year and I am thinking about next year, and convention is coming up and Sonya will be there, so I am wondering if I should or could marry the two ways, or if there is a detriment to do one over the other. And I will add that to do “curriculum” if you will with these two has always felt like I am trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.

    Thanks for reading and suggestions are welcomed.

    Kk

    nebby
    Participant

    I like reading about different approaches to education so I will have to check that book out.

    I will tell you what I think CM herself would say which is that the child’s curriculum (for lack of a better word) should not be delight directed. I was just reading somehting along thos elines in her 6th volume (I mention it in a recent blog post if you want to read her words on it: http://lettersfromnebby.wordpress.com/2014/04/02/thoughts-on-selecting-books/). She says spread a broad feast and they will take in what they need but she does not cater to their interests. Her idea is that if the materials are of the right sort they should be inherently interesting and keep the attention. She also speaks in other places of not becoming an eccentric by focusing all on one area.

    Having said which, I do alter what we do to cater somewhat to my kids’ interests too. I would not take a hard line on this, especially with kids with special needs of any sort.

    Nebby

    mycupoverflows
    Participant

    It’s interesting that you posted this. My husband and I have become very good friends over the last year with a family who has embraced the Lifestyle of Learning message. We have had many very good conversations about LOL, Charlotte Mason and nearly everything related to education, really. 🙂

    I have to point out that Lifestyle of Learning is more about the parents. It is about learning to love well with a heavy emphasis on capturing your children’s hearts, becoming a student of your children, learning to seek God’s will for your children’s education and everything in between. I’m sure there’s a ton more but that is basically what I’ve taken away from my friend’s explanations and the occasional email I get from LOL.

    I struggled for a short period of time between delight-directed learning and CM’s more structured methods (which I have used for the last 4 years). But I ended up choosing against DD. It is not my intention to criticize what another family chooses to do; delight-directed learning is what my dear friends have chosen for their family and they have my encouragment and support in that decision. 

    However, I agree with nebby (and Charlotte) in that delight-directed learning can lead to a bit of a chaotic education. There have been numerous times when my children didn’t even know they liked something until it was introduced to them through the structure of CM’s methods. And sometimes things “grew” on my kids. Maybe they started out hating classical music but through gentle, persistent exposure, my children have grown to not necessarily love it, but definitely appreciate it. 

    I also feel like there is a delicate balance here regarding self-discipline in education. I believe that character is built through perservering and doing things that one may not particularly care for. I constantly tell my children that I do things every day that I don’t want to do. I hate paying bills, scrubbing toilets and mopping floors. Yet that is part of my duties and it’s my job to make sure that I am doing them well and with a joyful servant’s heart. I understand that children are still young and learning and I’m not saying that their entire day should be full of things they hate, but even at a young age they should begin learning that there are things we love to do and then there are things we must do. 

    I could go on, but those are the basic reasons why we decided to stay with CM’s methods. And, of course, I always try to encourage my children’s interests and passions. After all, that is one of the reasons we homeschool! This is why CM’s short, morning lessons that leave the afternoons and evenings free for pursuit of those passions is ideal for us. 

    All of that to say, LOL is still a great message and, in fact, I feel like most of what Marilyn has to say isn’t that much different than CM. 

    Thanks for letting me share my thoughts!

    Leah

    Kk
    Participant

    Thanks Nebby and Leah for your responses.

    It was good to hear your perspectives and something more for me to chew on, although I have this uncanny ability to see both sides of the discussion, (ugh) here are my further thoughts

    About the CM feast: I can liken that to one of these all you can eat buffets. We can find ourselves overeating just b/c its all included in the one price. And then we feel pretty uncomfortable afterwards. Offering the child a smattering of this and that has been overkill for my daugh (but its quite possible what I was using was the fly in the ointment) and with my other child he wasn’t able to engage in more than 10 percent of it.

    When I say the atmosphere is pleasanter as they pursue more of their passions, we don’t negate what LOL calls “table time.”My son is learning penmanship, via copy work, we are reading living books, (although not settling into a particular history era) he is happier out of doors with the frogs , toads, wooly bears, etc, so that becomes our nature study, b/c inevitably he wants to bring them in and wants to know how to care for them etc, math seems to happen with him , whether he is lining up his collection of matchbox cars , bldg with legos, baking with me, or working from a text . All these things are done in short , mostly b/c that is all he can handle. Meanwhile my daug finds math to be like a foreign Lang. I have still insisted she do it and she has but has fully come away with no understanding of it. And I will add it hasn’t changed with whatever program we have used. We have fulfilled the state requirements of covering the math, but no more than that. She is a lovely young lady with a caring heart for others and loves doing for others, loves her music (flutist and drums) and uses those to serve whether on church worship team or playing at the annual Pregnancy Resource banquet. Etc. she is able to converse with adults well and engage with lit the children as well. Sorry if I’m getting carried away here, there is sooo much good in her, and it all disappears if she is having to work in the confines of curr.

    Another big concern of mine is curricula per se. I have 5 grown children out of the house. 2 weeks ago I had to fly to my older daughs to take care of my grandchildren as her husband had a medical crisis and was in ICU. Last fall another daugh delivered triplets 3 1/2 mos prematurely, I had to be there for that (two are still in hospital, 1 home and lots of bumps in the journey) and as the bumps occurred some of them we had to be there for. Our life has become different than we knew it. Having a curriculum scares me that I wouldn’t be able to keep the pace of the curr and then become a crazy woman b/c I would perceive I failed.

    Last but not least : is having a curriculum a contrived way to educate ? Basically the living books we have had the children read are biographies , my daugh noticed a year ago that she is always selecting ones from a certain time period and this year decided she purposes to only select from Am. History. She has read approx 25 books, and did art narrations, or written. My son, has read a bit more (of course I read some ) he has done some oral narration . Lap book here and there and in his play I have overheard him playing some of the ppl. S if a smattering feast could work that they get from it, couldn’t reading in itself lend this same reward?

    Ok these are my thoughts.

    Leah I am not sure i am so on board with LOL and the parenting , having the child’s heart is a must for anyone of us, but we each have the exact families God saw fit for us and the dynamics of each family differs , I have a child that has echolaia and uses it in a very ugly manner. when we approach it in a soft , fuzzy way he doesn’t respond and will escalate the behaviors, but when we are firm he perceives that as caring and love. I have jokingly described my role as policeman or drill sergeant with him, but in truth he needs clear boundaries. Of course it is our desire that he will govern himself appropriately more and more.

    Thanks again for your time. I still aim to chat with Sonya at the convention soon if she is not too overwhelmed .

    Blessings

    Kk

    retrofam
    Participant

    I haven’t read LOL, but read a book that referred to it. For background, my current favorite book is Heart of Wisdom. I am choosing subjects and books to read, but allowing the children to be Delight-Directed with their narration, project, etc. I call it “do something with the material”. My son is very hard to motivate and keep on task. With this method he decides if he feels like using Legos one day, he picks a Lego project that goes with our reading. Other days its write a story, poem, make a board game, act out a skit, or the other tons of ideas found in unit studies. I give ideas on days they are stuck. It has been great because I was getting bored with too much that is prepackaged unit studies. I don’t know if this approach will always work, but for this season it is great! We do this for Bible and history currently. I plan to add science next year. Right now science is oral narration.

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