I am new to this forum, although I have been reading them for months. Some of you are starting to feel like good friends…
I have to answer this post. My daughter sounds a lot like yours.
My story is kind of long, but I will try to shorten it. My daughter went to public school for three long, disturbing years. She was sick for 7 weeks every year (pnuemonia and strep, broncitis, etc several hospital visits. Every year the teacher decided to pass her even though she obviously was getting further behind. Appeals to the teachers, principal, support teachers, etc didn’t help. Not knowing where to go the Title teachers told me to request test for disabilities, specifically for a processing disorder. We requested help and they started the process. In the meantime, I googled “processing disorders” and read about two of the kinds. I have to tell you I almost cried! Someone knew my daughter. The list of common indicators is very similiar to ADD/ADHD and must be tested by an audiologist who specifically trained for this. I have been so watched over by the Lord, because the day after I read about this someone “happened” to mention that the State School for the Blind did this paticular test for free, I just had to call for the appt. It was so worth the drive. She has an auditory processing disorder. The school didn’t want to accept that as the answer even though all the other tests came back “normal”. Every meeting we had (after each failing report card) focused on my lack of cooperation in getting her tested for ADD. I finally caved and started the process. Again the Lord was watching out for my family. My husband told me of the wonderful lady at a Health Food store that he delivered packages to, (he drives for FedEx). She told him to have me call her. She was an angel. I talked and talked to her. She didn’t always have the complete answer but she could always point me in the right direction. She mentioned food allergies. I was postitive that I didn’t want my child on drugs (that’s what the school was pushing). I found a book on Amazon called “No More ADHD” and bought it. It is an easy read and right after I read it I scheduled my whole family for food allergy testing. My oh my…life did change. 
We had a lot of sensitivities, but the major ones are yeast, dairy, wheat and gluten. I have had the entire family on this “lifestyle” for a year. I have 4 dd and a dh. ALL of us suffer from this… but after several months on the lifestyle, the attention problems, the sickness, the issues she was stuggling so hard with eased so much. I took everyone out of PS so that I could keep them healthier and to help her. She is now reading so much better, spelling is still terrible, still some letter reversals, but I have her do lots of oral narration, drawing narration, etc. She is thriving on the CM methods. She requires tons of repitition, and more repitiion, and still more… sigh. But she is so much happier (and healthier). She spends her days in creative things too.
My bottom line is check into food allergy testing and the auditory processing disorder. The food allergies can make you hyper, sick, tired, angry, needy, etc. The APD mirrors ADD and makes the reading and writing process difficult. She would “know” something one night so well and the next day she didn’t even know what I was talking about, which is pretty APD classic. I was at my wits end with the school because they wouldn’t let her do things orally. Now we just practise lots, and do different levels of school work as she is capable. Here are some things that helped us:
Try to make 1 to 2 step directions of any thing you have her do. Have her repeat back to you each step. Make her have eye contact with you.
At school they made a little red light for when they were doing class instruction. The teacher would touch it or her shoulder as a reminder that what she was going to say was something she had to remember.
I try to let my dd have a check off list of things to do – it helps her focus.
When we struggle, I stop and remind her that it the APD, not her. That helps too.
She does her best work when I am at the table with her. I don’t hover, usually I am reading or preparing for the next thing, but she concentrates better.
We have her read scripture out loud with the whole family. She has gained a lot of confidence.
She gets to choose some “fun” twaddly type books to read on her own. (I am assuming that Junie B. is twaddly, but she is devouring them!) At least we are getting reading practise in, in addition to the assigned stuff.
She is assigned chores – dishes, laundry, vacuuming, sweeping, dusting, babysitting, trash, etc. It helps her follow through abilities and confidence too, since school is only one part of life.
Things do take her longer than they do for my other dds. Patience.
Also, APD is most commonly found in 8-9 yr olds. I got her tested at 7, which is kind of tricky. We have an Earobics Home computer game suggested by the audiologist (ebay) and also used the LeapFrog dvd.
I printed tons of file folder games off the filefolderfun site. Lots of them are free and fun. She loves them.
Check out the food! It might suprise you.
HTH,
Sheila