Hi Kelly! I have done the exact same thing with my 14 year old daughter. When I originally allowed her to have it (my MIL passed it on when she got a new iPhone), it was for music listening purposes only. I set the parental controls and took all game apps and the safari app off of the phone so that she could only use her music app and Pandora app. That worked well for a while. Then she was passed down another used phone and I haven’t locked this one yet. It’s interesting that you bring this subject up because I’m going to delete all apps except for her music apps and lock this one today. I just don’t feel at peace with giving a 14 year old unlimited access to the internet with no supervision.
I actually created a thread on here a few days ago titled screens and teens to discuss how parents are handling this issue with their teens. Since then, I have spent some time in prayer and reflection and decided to make the following rules:
1 hour of game time on weekdays with 30 minutes of chat time with friends online.
2 hours of screen time on the weekends for games and chatting.
I’ve debated about leaving the apps on my daughter’s phone and just keeping it put up during school hours and bed time. However, I’ve found that it’s just too hard to monitor usage.
I don’t allow any social media.
I think having a personal, mini computer that can fit in your pocket and go anywhere with you, is just too much of a temptation for a teen. Iphones are highly addictive. I didn’t let my son have an iPhone until he was almost 18 and able to buy it himself and pay his bill for himself.
I really can’t think of any pros as far as kids owning iphones goes. Computer usage certainly has many pros but that is easier to monitor and can be kept in a public area. I really like laptops because they are easy to pack up and put away when you don’t want anyone to be on them.
There are certainly some great apps out there. The way to use them safely is to download them on to the iPhone and then block any changes so that the child can only access the apps you’ve downloaded onto the phone. They can’t buy or download more.
Keeping screens in their place is a constant struggle with teens in this day and age and it is only getting worse. I think it’s important that we help our teens to familiarize themselves with iphones, tablets and computers because they will probably be using them even more in the future. However, I don’t think this means that they need to own one of each and have constant access to them.
There is a new book by Kathy Koch called Screens and Teens. I’m looking forward to reading it when I get a chance.
