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Adoption
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We recently adopted a sibling group of three through public adoption in Canada. It was free except for the criminal checks which were $50 each and the medical check, another $50. We met them January 2010, they moved in May 2010.
We had first looked at international adoption of one girl but were overwhelmed at the length of time (we were in our late 40’s and our children then were 10, 14, 16 and 21 – all boys). So we decided to check the need in Canada and found it to be HUGE! I think international adoption is great but we also need to realize that there is alot of need in our own countries.
So, like Angie, we almost doubled our children, from 4 – 7. Now we have 5 boys, 7, 12, 16, 18, 23 and 2 girls, 8 and 13. What an adventure:)
Susan
Ohh, I love talking adoption! We have 2 bio sons (13 and 11) and 2 daughters adopted from China (5 and 4) and our dossier is sitting in China for us to adopt another little girl (or 2…). The process is tedious, but not unbearable. Most agencies are pretty organized and if you go through the checklist it’ll get done.
We started adopting in 2005 in the traditional program (“healthy” was what it was referred to…sadly). Before we got a referral, we decided to switch to the special needs program, now called waiting children. These are children who have a medical need, many correctable or not an issue, some pretty heavy conditions, but you get to decide what you are comfortable with. Shaoey had a repaired cleft lip and unrepaired cleft palate when she joined our family in 2006. Grace joined our family 2 years ago this week. She’s missing her left forearm and hand (amniotic banding syndrome)–a nonissue for us. The girl we’re trying to adopt next is 6 years old and has hydrocephalus and mild/moderate scoliosis. In God’s sense of humor, He guides us deeper and deeper. Kind of like boiling a frog, you don’t put it hot water, you put it in cold water and gradually turn up the heat! LOL
Our adoptions have run about $25,000 each BUT that includes the whole family traveling to China for 2-3 weeks! That is a large portion of our costs. Especially the last one…we left Christmas Eve 2008. Between holiday and fuel prices….UGH!
Our girls are the most amazing, precious little creations. They have brought us so much love and joy and have taught us so much about life and love. We have such a newfound awareness of our own adoption into God’s family, what it really means to be counted as His own. They are as much “ours” as the boys are. (sorry, didn’t mean to digress, just so amazing!)
We have 2 adoption blogs. www.journeytoshaoey.com and http://www.yourgraceisenough.com. I haven’t done well at updating them after we came home b/c I do most of our blogging now at http://www.themiracleofthemoment.blogspot.com, but they will give you a pretty good idea of what the process looks like, or most of it as we snuck in pre-Hague for those 2 adoptions. It’s changed a little, but the basis is the same.
Hi,
We’ve adopted our youngest five (out of ten) from China — three boys and two girls. Also I’ve worked with many adoptive families in the last two years. These families were going everywhere — China,Ethiopia, Vietnam, Liberia, Vietnam, Russia, India, Guatemala, Korea plus many domestic adoptions as well. The one thing that I can tell you is that domestic adoptions can be almost as expensive or more expensive than international unless you go with the foster to adopt program.
God calling us to adoption has been one of the most challenging, exciting and joyful things in our lives. I’m so praying for Him to call MANY more Christian families to adopt. The need is huge. I’d be thrilled to personally talk to anyone interested in adoption to share some of what we’ve learned, but I need to go cook now…… :>
Jean
I’m so glad that more of you have piped in and shared your adoption stories; I’m very encouraged. Next to prayer, how have you all decided whether to adopt domestic or international? We are not opposed to a domestic adoption, however, India has been our prayer target for some time – our heart is already there…..
Please keep sharing. May you all have a blessed New Year!
You know, it’s funny. We never saw anything but China. So many asked why we would adopt a child in China when there are so many here who need homes. All I know is that God had this particular child for us and he was in China. Even at that, we were “planning” for a girl. We have all boys and all nephews. But God had other plans. Just trust where He leads. It may not work out as you plan, but it will be the perfect plan. (Re-reading I see that I was redundant but I’ll leave it…)
I have to agree with RobinP…we just knew. I truly believe that God calls different families to different places. It’s not a matter of there are children here or there that need families…we’ve gotten that question too…for us it is a matter of obedience to God and where he was calling US. I say go with your heart, I think there’s a reason your hearts already there.
Same answer as Robin and Tandc93. We KNEW he was the child we needed to adopt, even though he was in Russia. We found his picture the first day we even starting researching adoption and he “stuck”. After much prayer we knew we had to get him and miracle after miracle happened to bring him home. We still have our ‘feelers’ out to hopefully know when the Lord has another child ready for us.
Heather
Much the same answer. We tried special needs domestic adoption for almost two years and just kept hitting roadblocks. Our hearts had always been pulled to China and the specific needs of that country, but we didn’t think we could ever afford it and China wouldn’t accept us with five children already in our home. Then, suddenly it just all fell into place. China relaxed the family limit and when we stepped out in faith (five times!!!) the money came when we needed it. Really, we were witness to miracle after miracle in our adoption journeys.
Jean
I had felt called to international when I was still in college and single. When I was younger, and to be honest a little still now, domestic scared me b/c you never hear the success stories, just the ones where things went wrong. I realize that most domestic adoptions are safe but I was young and that is not where I felt called. My best friend has two wonderful domestically adopted children and is next in line at her agency for a baby from Ethiopia. They felt that with 2 children, they were no longer attractive enough to birth mothers looking at files and they too always felt called to international at some point. So I know domestic turns out beautifully in most cases. Anyway, at our first international meeting back in 2001 we went to the meeting “knowing” full well we were getting a little girl from Korea. Literally the first sentence the lady said was, “We are not accepting families for Korea as the current wait is three years.” I burst into tears convinced God was shutting the entire adoption door. Good thing I think so small! After listing all the other countries and their qualifications, we had all doors opened to Guatemala. I could list the blessings of that process for hours. So this second time around, we started our adoption process in 2009 wanting another angel from Guatemala. But Guatemala is currently closed to US adoptions and so we decided to wait to complete our homestudy for a full year in the hopes that Guatemala would re-open. Sadly it has not so we reviewed the other countries and all the doors this time around have opened for South Korea. It gives me such joy to imagine God smiling as I cried in that meeting as He was thinking, “I have your Korean baby for you, he just isn’t ready yet, hang on crazy lady!” And as I said in my first post, we are hoping to find out if we have been accepted for a waiting child with minor health needs and should know if we were selected on Monday or Tuesday of this week! We are on the “healthy” child list but open to many types of special needs b/c of the blessings of our oldest biological dd who has severe special needs so we have put our names in for two other children on the waiting list but were not selected and this current baby is our third. If we do not have the blessing of baby, we will have the next or one of the healthy ones. Our first adoption process taught me to just let it go. God’s blessings are so much greater than anything I can ask for so getting passed up for the last babies have only gotten me more excited to meet my next child, knowing that God is ahead of this whole thing preparing the way for our family to grow. My advice for selecting domestic/international/special needs/boy/girl/foster etc is to get out of the way and walk through all the open doors and don’t waste time and energy knocking on the closed ones. God is the God of 2011 and we get the awesome pleasure of watching Him do His thing! I can’t wait! I will post our news Monday or Tuesday for sure!
It looks like Holt is doing adoptions from India: http://www.holtinternational.org/india/ (I’ve heard they are great but don’t know anyone personally who’s worked with them)
I personally had always felt that we would adopt from China. I minored in Chinese studies in college and learned about the history, the geography, the language … and we live in a city with a large Chinese population and plenty of opportunities for kids to learn about Chinese culture. I was SURE that it was the place we were meant to adopt from. However, we are no longer eligible for China because of medication I’m on, and the wait is soooo long — if we do adopt, it will probably be from elsewhere, probably Ethiopia or maybe Colombia.
Thank you, Wendee, for filling me in about foster care. It sounds like you’ve been very blessed! The only thing that I would worry about with foster care, is having to give the child back after getting so attached. Has that ever happened to you or anyone else here? Each and everyone of your responses are significant; they are extremely valuable to us as we consider adoption.
lgeurink,I look forward to hearing what you find out tomorrow. Please keep us posted. Praying Gods will for your family.
Have any of you worked with or heard of Childrens House International? Do you know if they are a reputable agency? Thanks again! ~ Heather
csmamma
you asked if anyone had adopted through foster care. Yes all 4 of ours were . And the emotional roller coaster you ride until they are finally adopted is probably the same with international adoptions. and Yes, we did have to give 2 babies back. the first ones (a set of twins we had gotten from the NICU) from the hospital at 5 wks old. Mind you they had asked extended family members if they were interested and they all said no. So they were placed with us for adoption as we had asserted our home as adoption only. After 4 mos. a maternal aunt had a change of heart and decided to take them. It was difficult for us to let them go , our loss was real but I felt the worst for our then 7 yr old who had attached to them. 3 mos later we got a call to go the the hospital to pick up a 2 day old for adoption. Which we did, this had been the birth mothers 3 rd child , different dads, she was a crack addict. and she would drop them off at the hospital. Our little guy came home with us and then a “dad” stepped forward to claim him, because he was in the state’s care , they had to hash it out in the courts, At 7 1/2 mos the courts allowed him to go with the dad and I had complete peace about this. it never became a heart wrenching thing. 7 weeks later the phone rang and the social worker asked if we wanted him back , as dad took him to the city and left him behind while he engaged in criminial activity that landed him in jail for a year. Yes we took him back and I knew he was going to be our son. However 1 yr later when he was released he tried to fight through the courts for him and it took almost another year before the courts decided no, he was to be our son… It was a long battle, but the battle is the Lords and we had to trust Him for the outcome. Was it easy, yes some days , no the others. I asked the Lord for a verse during that final court part and He led me to PS 113 v.9 He maketh the barren woman (and I was barren as I was beyond child bearing age now) to be keeper at home and a joyful mother of children. I held on to that verse so tightly during the ordeal and that is what sustained us… Now 7 yrs later ……
Blessings on your journey
KK
We were not selected for this baby girl (we have been calling her Minnie!). Our social worker said that in her supervisors 11 years she has not had a child with as many request as this little one, 42% of the families waiting asked for the honor of being her family. It warms me so much to hear how many people have been praying for this little girl over the last two weeks, it has to have been hundreds. So we wait again and I am so excited to see how this plan of God’s works. Thank you all for waiting with me. Also, csmamma, I have not heard of Children’s House.
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