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accomplished smooth and easy days?
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Hello. I’m looking to hear from someone with younger children who has suceeded in attaining smooth and easy days. It was encouraging to see that I’m not the only one working on it, but I’d like to hear from someone who has accompmlished the goal, or at the ‘maintainance level’. My kids are 8,5,3&1 (2boys 2girls), can anyone relate and send a line of hope and experience? Thanks in advance, you guys are all great.
I think in many ways you never ‘arrive’ if you have little ones, there is always someone else to train. However I have to say that we’re pretty much there with the ones we’ve been working with. My children are 12, 8, 7, 5, 4, 2, 1, and 2 weeks old. So we truly have smooth and easy days most of the time with the 2 year old on up, though the 2 year old is still obviously in training. The 1 year old is just really beginning his training (hes 18 months)). And obviously the 2 week old is just waiting to shake things up…LOL.
In general my kids all have their habits in place for orderliness, obedience, and helpfulness (doing chores, homeschool, etc). Yes, sometimes a child has an off day, but so do I! Consistency is the one thing I recommend. Be consistent in following through. Have a routine. These things make all the difference over time.
And don’t expect perfection – just progress.
For me routine and consistancy really help (7, 5, 2 ages). The kids know what we are doing and what is expected of them. If for some reason I have to wake them up early we talk about ut the day before so that when I wake them they are ready for the day and not grumbling about having to get up. I am also honest with the kids, if I am having a rough day I tell them and ask that they help me a bit more, even if that means just being extra nice to their little brother so he is not “shouting”. We are busy, school Bible study group during the week, sports…, but in that it is a pretty constant schedule.
Thank you guys sooo much. Did both of you start good training with the 1st child, then add on and maintain? Or did either of you get a late start trying to train a group all at once? Did you guys use soley SCM training book or what other books highly influenced your parenting?? Thanks!
For our family it was about my DH and I “training” ourselves and the kids follow along. I can not imagine teaching the kids to plan a head, schedule, be on time… if DH and I were not doing those activities already.
For example since DH and I are early everywhere we go, LOL, the kids are now too. We talk about time and allowing time to get things done or places on time and if we do not plan a head we can miss out on fun because we are late. DH and I do our best to take care of our personal belongings, not loosing the car keys or phone, LOL. Along with that we talk to the kids about taking care of their personal things, not to greak or loose them because they can not always be replaced. Also asking for help when needed too.
Habits are a learning experience for my husband and I, always a work in progress, so we try to have a lot of grace in teaching the kids the same things we are working on.
I just got Laying Down the Rails, so I would have to say our style of “teaching” comes from our parents. A lot more my parents. I was HSed growing up, my parents were very honest with my siblings and me. I akways felt listened to and that we could share our opinions. Not that we got our way (not at all!), but we always felt good respect, as in that we knew our feelings were important even when the outcome was not what we wanted.
Honesty played a big role for me growing up. If my mom was having a bad day she would tell us. If financial things were tough they would tell us. We were never given details, but enough so that we felt a true part if the family. Decisions were made and we were asked our feelings, even if the outcome was not what we wanted, they wanted our honest opinion so at least it could be talked about not “bottled up”
Sorry for the ramble… i tend to talk things out a lot to get to my point (I do not even know if I found the point yet, LOL)
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