I have been following the SCM discussion forum rather quietly for almost a year and I must say that I have always enjoyed the opinions and guidance until reading this thread and a recent similar thread. I have enjoyed the plethora of opinions on various subjects because phrases similar to, "this is how our family does it "; "God is leading us toward or away from this..."; or "I do not parent this and such way, but this is my conviction on this and such for my family", are used. The previous mentioned phrases let me know that this is a community of parents who value each other enough to use discrepancy in their choice of words. I am also convinced that these gentle responses show that we are all moving towards raising our children toward the same goal - lifetime learners who seek our Lord. Any time we use pointed words to describe another parents method of raising the children God has blessed them with is demeaning to that parent whether intentional or not. I do understand that discipline is a highly controversial issue in any group and emotions run high, but things seemed to get a little out of hand and Dana's question seemed to get lost in the controversy. I really appreciated Sonya's remark that discipline is multifaceted. I tend to forget that at times.
Dana, If you are still reading this, I hope that you have been able to glean some valuable information to help you in your journey of raising your son. As you have found, some of us spank our children at ages younger than your son while others of us have never spanked our children in any of the eighteen years we have had them. Each of us have different personalities as do our children, therefore, our methods of discipline are as personalized as our bend or tendencies and our children's. Sonya's reminder that teaching, training, and correction are all part of discipline is expounded upon in her personal blog Intentional Parents (correct me if I am wrong).This question, while a great one to pose is best answered between you, God, and your husband. The best piece of advice that has helped me is; remain consistent in whichever method of correction you use for the violation that has taken place.