Topic | Love of learning versus always expecting perfection

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  • Skybluca
    Participant

    I am confused on how I expect my child’s very best (once that can be expected, of course,) and instilling a love of learning. I feel by expecting the very best from my 10 year old and 11 year old son will kill their love if learning. What am I missing…help!?!?!

    sarah2106
    Participant

    Very best is not the same as perfection 🙂

    You know your children best so you know when they are doing their best vs just trying to “get by”. All of my children have been different so my expectations are different for each depending on what they are working on and their ability and maturity.

    I tell then I want them to do their best, but because we all excel in different things that is why the outcomes can look different. I have one son who does well in math, it comes to him easier than his sister. I expect them to both do their best effort which means for my daughter she will still get some wrong and need some help often and that is still her best, but for my son if he gets more wrong it is because he was not paying attention because I know what he is capable of. The expectations are adjusted based on their individual best effort not compared to each other. 🙂

    Bek
    Participant

    I always say to my children, ‘You don’t have to be the best just do your best.’

    Karen Smith
    Moderator

    The love of learning comes from the connections they make with the subjects they study. Making the subjects enjoyable does not equate making it easy for them by not requiring them to always give their best effort. Sloppiness and laziness are two habits that are formed if you do not hold them to the standard of best effort. Remember that part of their education is to train them for life. Do you want them to give a future boss their best effort at their jobs? Then require their best effort now.

    If they are struggling to give their best effort, evaluate what you are requiring of them. Are the lessons too long? Then adjust them so that they can give their best effort for the entire lesson. Are you scheduling the subjects so that there is variety in their school day? If not, try changing your schedule a bit. For example, have them do a reading for history, then do math, then picture study, another reading, then dictation.

    Our Learning Library has lots of articles on habits and education. Two series of articles that may be helpful to you:

    Our series of articles that takes a look at atmosphere, discipline, and life and their relationship to education

    Our series of articles on the motto used in Charlotte Mason’s schools: I am, I can, I ought, I will.

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