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How come our day is so full? (and a question about Dianne Craft's Brain Integration)
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You can do the Brain Integration exercises without her Phonics/LA program. You might consider it if needed, but the exercises are by themselves.
to Lindsay:
My boys (not twins but 4 months apart in age) are not reading on their own so they need one-on-one for reading. They struggle a bit with math also and usually need me and get frustrated if I’m helping both at the same time. I’m trying to guard our time by trying to not have them both need a new lesson on the same day (we’re using MUS Alpha) and I’ll try again sitting with both after a discussion about manners and time management and see if I can get them working well with me dividing my time. I have 30 min planned each day for math (of my time – 15 min each) and if all goes well that may go down to 20 min. Not much of a time saver but at least a safeguard to not go over the 30 min. For instruments I aspire to sit with each of them during their practice bc that makes the best, most focused playing, but with one on piano and one on drums, they can’t be at the same time even if I’m only spending time with one each day (which is more usual).
I don’t feel I can get out of the activist club we formed or Jr FLL but I’ve made a plan so that JrFLL should meet only 6 or 7 times (as opposed to 6 MONTHS last year) with planned breaks for the other club so that most of the JrFLL weeks we’ll not be doing the other club. Once JrFLL is over, it is over for the year.
We can never give up BMX. My son is going to be the next famous BMX or motocross racer, you know. Truly it is all he lives for so while we go through periods of not doing it much and we’re never pressured to do it every weekend (like most of the other racers), it will always be something we get back to.
Art – how do you give up art? We love painting and experimenting and always feel like we don’t do it enough. Before we did academic things we painted every day. Now it isn’t even once a week. 🙁
For the club, there are more skills being learned besides public speaking. A lot of it is planning and completing a larger project, working with others with different views, learning you can make a difference if you work towards it… I wonder all the time about quitting it but it is creatively put together to accomplish goals another mom and I wish for our kids in a child-led community oriented way, and that seems so good it is hard to stop! We do take breaks from it and plan for only 2 to 3 projects a year, but each project takes ~2 months of weekly meetings.
And I hear you about the afternoons. I’m not trying to say ‘help me’ and then when folks give suggestions saying ‘well that won’t work’. I hope I’m not coming off that way. I absolutely agree there needs to be a reduction in the plan. I think for one, we’ll not go to playgroup on Thursdays when we have done afternoon activities M-W that week. Still it is a great time for them to see friends and be outside running around (both of which we don’t do enough). They’re not in any classes this year so not seeing their friends in any other way. Still, I’m making a rule that if we’re out M, T and W, we’ll stay home on Thursday.
I have changed our morning routine to have history only MWF and language arts TTh, instead of history M-Th and LA M-F. I know there are other changes I need to make but I’m not sure what they are yet. I think once I put the afternoon plans on a large calendar I can see what each week looks like for this term and make adjustments again.
Shannon – You may want to take this year to JUST get the boys up to speed with the reading and math. In your post you said that they are in second grade, but if they are still needing lots of help with reading and are still working through Alpha I probably would suggest that they might be working at a first grade level and it sounds like you want to get them up to grade level (2nd?) prior to testing in February. (I hope this is coming across ok, I’m trying to say it gently and just repeat the information you’ve given us). Other than becoming independent readers, you probably don’t need to be doing any other language arts with them (spelling, copywork, grammar, etc….) – ESPECIALLY if you think that they may have a blocked learning gate (or more) Dianne Craft. I WOULD try to add her brain training program to your day if the boys are still learning to read – you don’t have to use her reading program. You can do these physical exercises all together and it will take 20 minutes – they should be supervised for this so they don’t rush through and they need to be completed daily. We have seen marked improvement in my daughter’s reading and spelling since implementing Dianne’s program. She also has suggestions for memorizing math facts which could be helpful with getting those addition tables down in Alpha.
I applaude you for taking a look at that afternoon schedule – I know it’s so hard to let things go. I have started praying about things and asking the Lord, “If you want us to do this, please make it available on X day between X time and X time – otherwise, I’ll trust that this is not something you want us to do right now.” I don’t do ANYTHING in the mornings – no doctors appointments, so special outings, no shopping, nothing, because if we don’t get school done in the morning, it isn’t happening in the afternoon and if I make an exception for one thing, I let my guard down and pretty soon we’re out of the house one morning a week! I, personally, try to only have one day a week where we go anywhere, though this year we’re up to two days (afternoons) and unless anything new fits into those afternoons, we’re not doing anything else (I’m NOT suggesting you need to be as limited – I should probably be MORE limited as I’m expecting baby number 5 in two weeks) – but rather just trying to give another example of making those outside things work well.
Keep up the great work – you’ll get there!
Oops and I should have specified – I meant JUST reading and math, as opposed to worrying about getting in history or language arts or other more “academic” subject.
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who responded to this thread. Although I was not the OP, I found this VERY helpful and have adjusted my schedule significantly and feel much better about the flow of our week. Shannon, I hope you found it helpful as well! Thank you for your honesty!
I am benefitting so much from reading your thread Shannon.
I wanted to share that 6 weeks ago we decided to drop all of our kids activities, for a number of reasons, this fall and for at least 6 months. We want to re-solidify our family base and if / when we add any again to do so very slowly. Our kids are 10, 8, 6, & 4. So far it has been a rich blessing for all of us and the rest we needed from structured doing and tight schedules.
The other thing that came to me as I read was the following:
The time and days we have on Earth are a gift from God to us that He allows us to manage as we will. Prayerfully considering what He wants our days to look like for our individual families can be so helpful as He guides us to our needs. Our children will have many desires and wants, as will we. We can not possibly though do even a fraction of them due to our limitations. Sometimes the limitations are physical, monetary, opportunity, or time.
Our culture promotes pushing out those limitations as far as possible; but has it made America happier or holier than it was 150 years ago when it lived more simply?
I would encourage you to accept the time constraints we all have to work within and pick and choose and prioritize. Your boys will learn much about managing their own lives some day if you tell them that a choice must be made between activities. Choosing between activities gives the family focus, identity, and teaches our children what we value most. How we manage the time & money God allows us to have speaks volumes to our children of our true values and beliefs. Homeschooling is very good at forcing us to prioritize these areas in our lives.
The short lessons do help rotating my children through one-on-one help where they need it, but it still takes time. I still have to teach my 10 year old many thins; math comes first to mind & it is even his gift – so he does a lot on his own but also needs new concepts taught regularly. So it doesn’t necessarily get easier; at least I have not found it easier over the years but that it increases a little each year.
My last thought was that I liked what the mother shared from her father-in-law that is a retired pastor. I would agree with him that his generation was better adjusted and did not have so much or so many activities. I think my grandparents and parents generation had a better foundation in character, day-to-day living, a lack of entitlement, and a greater centeredness than my generation has generally known. My DH even, who grew up running through apple orchards and never had any activities except that offered through school, I have always thought had a more grounded center than I have from my multiple activities that started in first grade and accelerated to rarely home at all by high school. He is the main advocate in our home for showing me the character benefits in our children by not doing too much. He has proven many times to be right.
Prayers for your choices. Prayer is a wonderful place to meet with God for the answers.
Shannon,
I ran across this quote today and thought of you:
“I have three criteria to apply to any item trying to make its way onto my to-do list: Is the activity fun, meaningful, or absolutely necessary? If not, I give myself permission to say ‘No, I won’t be able to take that on.’” – Amy Tiemann, “Mojo Mom”
Hope you are starting to find balance!
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