I haven't read the other posts and don't have time to post at length right now. Only 2 years ago, I was in your shoes. I commend you for allowing them to feel safe by your side. My kids needed this desperately when their world fell apart. Really they still do. I made little mats right next to the bed for my little ones. They transitioned well into them with only occassional nights in bed with me. They needed that! I still have one that uses hers. She will occassionally climb into bed when she is super scared. She is older now (7) and can be still better so it's not so bad when she's next to me.
I know this sounds trite but I mean it will all my heart and soul! God has to be your strength. I would fall asleep reading HIS Word. I awoke in the night, and It quieted my soul and mind. I rose, deadingly, in the morning and found the means to live by It. I kept scriptures about me everywhere. It was the only way I got through our nightmare and kept a fairly gentle spirit. Even now, I could not live without God's Word. It is my strength and my portion.
Deut. 8:3 says "He humbled you and let you be hungry, and fed you with manna which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that He might make you understand that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD." Our dear Lamb, says that again in Matt. 4:4.
I know there is more to do than you can handle. God's Word must be first. It may seem as if you don't have time most days, but you can't afford to not. Get your children listening and reading it too. Mine listen to it as they fall asleep and listen or read first thing in the morning. We memorize His Word at mealtimes and in the car. Isaiah 26:3 says: You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Ask, each day, "what is the work You would have me to do?" Do no more or no less.
If you have an ipod type device please PM me, I have something that might help your children sleep.
My heart breaks for you! Its a hard place that God has you in. This quote goes through my head a lot: Any thing that makes us need God is a blessing. -Nancy Leigh DeMoss.
Listen to Revive our Hearts on your way to work. It has helped me not feel so alone and encouraged me to keep walking by the Sprit.
Psalm 121
I will lift up my eyes to the mountains;
From where shall my help come?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.
3 He will not allow your foot to slip;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
4 Behold, He who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.
